


Promise I'm Worthy

by HPfanonezillion



Series: The Life and Loves of Annie Cresta [2]
Category: Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins
Genre: Acceptance, Angst, Depression, F/M, Family, Loss, Love, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-08
Updated: 2015-03-08
Packaged: 2018-03-16 20:48:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 29
Words: 54,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3502307
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HPfanonezillion/pseuds/HPfanonezillion
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ten years after the uprising that started after the 75th Annual Hunger Games, a ceremony is being held in memory of all those that lost their lives. Annie and her son make the journey reluctantly. There they meet with Gale and a friendship starts. As Gale sets Annie's world askew and forms an attachment with her son, a new feeling is sparked between the adults.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"Please, Annie, we need you here." Katniss said over the phone.

"I don't know, Katniss. Finn has school." She sat stock still on her couch, staring off into the distance.

"All the schools are closing. It's a national holiday."

"I know what you're avoiding saying."

"And what is that?"

"That Finnick would want me there." Her voice cracked at her late husband's name.

"It's been ten years, Annie. Don't you think we should all move on?"

"Are you moving on? After your sister died? After Gale's bomb was used against her?"

"Annie."

"Just let me think about it, okay? I don't know if I want my son subjected… I just don't know, Katniss."

Finn came inside, smelling of the sea. "You okay, Mom?"

"Fine, Finn." She went back to her phone conversation. "I'll get back to you."

"You do that."

She hung up the phone and stared off into the distance. Her son sat down beside her.

"Mom?"

She put an arm around his shoulder. "Would you like to see the Capitol, Finn?"

"Really?"

"Really. There's a ceremony…"

"Because of the uprising? Dad and all the others?"

Annie swallowed some tears. "Yeah."

"So we're going to the Capitol? Will Katniss be there?"

"You like Katniss?"

"She's always so nice to me. Is it because of Dad?"

"Yeah. He saved her life more than once. He saved mine."

"Will you tell me about him again?"

"Not tonight, Finn. Go get ready for bed. It's getting late."

"We haven't had supper yet."

"Oh, that's right."

"I'll make something." He got off the couch and headed to the kitchen.

Some deep part of her knew this was wrong. She knew she should be the one making supper and setting the table and all those things, but she couldn't make herself. She lied down on the couch and curled up. She thought of Finnick. What would their life be like now if he had lived?

She was lost in her world again. At some point Finn floated into her vision and asked her to come to the table and eat.

"I'm not hungry." She mumbled.

"Please, Mom. Come eat something."

"I said I'm not hungry, Finn. Eat without me."

He sighed and walked away, "I always eat without you."

She wanted to cry, but no tears came. She heard the dishes clank as her son cleaned up. The lights went out. She felt him kiss her cheek and then all was silent.

Annie wasn't sure if she slept or if she was just off in the world she went to all the time. She saw the arena. She saw it flood. She felt her arms and legs moving as she fought to survive, fought the insanity that had started to creep in when her friend had been killed.

Then things shifted and there was Finnick, holding her and telling her it was all over and she was safe. Telling her she had won. What sort of victory was watching all those people die? What did it mean that she was still here and twenty-three others had lost their lives all for entertaining the people of Panem?

Dark times followed. As she looked through the dark times in her memory, she registered the sunrise. She felt the shift of the atmosphere as Fin awoke and started moving around, getting ready for school that day.

The phone rang. Her son answered. She heard him mumbling into it, but couldn't focus on the words, though he was so close.

Then he was bidding her good-bye and leaving.

She stayed there the rest of the day.

She dragged herself off the couch when Finn returned from school. She picked up the phone and dialed Katniss's number.

Peeta answered. "Hello?"

"It's Annie. Is Katniss home?"

"Yeah, hold on."

Katniss came to the phone. "Hey, Annie. How are you?"

"I've been better. I think."

"I called this morning. Talked to Finn."

"That was you?"

"Yeah. So do you need anything?"

"No, I…Um, we'll be there. You're right, it's probably time to try to move on."

"I'll be close, I promise."

"Yeah. Okay."

"You know I know some of what you're going through."

"You didn't lose Peeta."

"I almost did. It killed me."

"Look, I don't want to talk about this. We'll come to the Capitol."

"Okay. I'll send along the itinerary. You'll have a room in the guest housing. Just to warn you, they've renovated the training center for that purpose."

"So we'll be staying in the training center?"

"They've completely renovated it. I've visited. I had the same reservations, but it will be fine. I promise."

"I'll blame you if it's not." She teased softly.

"Take care of yourself, Annie. I'll see you next week."

 

"Soldier Hawthorne, a call from you. She says she's Katniss." Gale's assistant said from the doorway to his office.

"Katniss Mellark?" he asked surprised.

"She didn't give a last name, sir."

"But she wouldn't have to would she?" He mumbled to himself. "Patch it through. And go home for the night, Soldier Cole. I'm sure your wife is missing you."

"Thank you, sir."

"Katniss?" Gale said when he picked up the phone.

"Yeah, hi."

"I didn't ever expect to hear from you again."

"Yeah, well, I wasn't sure I wanted to ever talk to you again."

"So what changed?" He sat down on his desk.

"Annie Odair. Annie Cresta."

"You and her good friends now? You replace me?"

"There's no replacing you, Gale." She said softly.

"You've pretty much ignored me for ten years. Except for the letter telling me you finally married Peeta. And then the letter I got last year from the committee for the ten year ceremony, of which you are a member."

"Yeah, I know. I was hurt. You know how hurt I was."

"She was my sister too. I took care of her and watched over her all that time you were gone. It hurt me too. That was my idea and they used it against people I cared about. They hurt you."

"Gale, I want to be like we were."

"We can't be. Not completely. So much has changed, Katniss. I still hurt."

"I do too."

There was silence on the line.

"I just want my friend back. I've lost so much. It killed me when I lost you. I know it was your idea. I know you and Beetee designed it. He developed it. But I've come to the conclusion you'd never have been so callus. You wouldn't actually hurt all those innocent children."

"So you've forgiven me?"

"Yes." She paused. "Have you forgiven me for choosing Peeta?"

"Yeah."

"Have you been dating anyone?"

"I've talked to a few girls over the years. But none of them were you."

"I'm sorry."

"Yeah, well, nothing we can do about it now. You were always his." He sighed, "I'll see you next week."

"Maybe we can get together and shoot some targets."

He smiled, "Wander out into the woods and shoot a few birds or something?"

She chuckled. "Yeah, I think we can arrange that."

"Bye, Katniss."

"Good-bye, Gale."

He hung up the phone and rubbed his face. "What am I doing?"


	2. Chapter 2

Finn ran up to Katniss when he saw her waiting on the train platform and threw his arms around her waist.

"Finn?" she asked, holding the boy at arm's length. "Look how much you've grown."

"Hi, Katniss."

She let go of the boy and gave Annie an awkward, but kind hug. "Hi, Annie."

"Hi, Katniss. How's Peeta?"

"Fine. Everyone's fine. We're happy you're here. Your rooms are ready. You're the last ones to arrive."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. Come on. Your things are being loaded. There's a car waiting outside."

"A car just for us?" Finn asked.

"Just us, kiddo." She affectionately ruffled his hair.

They walked out and got in the car. The boy was excited. His mother subdued. It dampened his spirits slightly once he realized it.

Katniss softly said, "If you want to, we're having a bit of a dinner party. Nothing big, just Peeta and Haymitch and Gale. And me, of course. So if you two want to join us, you're free to."

"Can we, Mom?" Finn asked.

"I-I don't know." She said. "Maybe."

"That's better than no." he sighed and sat back to watch the Capitol zoom by.

Katniss tried unsuccessfully to start conversation. "You're both on the same floor as my old friend Gale Hawthorne."

"Okay."

"If you do join us for dinner, we'll have the meal on your floor."

"All right."

"Peeta and I will be close. Our rooms are on the same floor, but a different wing."

She nodded.

When she realized Annie wouldn't respond, she was a little happy. She knew exactly where her mind was. It was the same place her own was.

She was back at that day so many years before when she made this same journey; the journey that led to certain death for twenty-three kids. Well, in her case, it was only twenty-two. But it didn't matter. The death of just one person in those senseless Games was atrocious. There had been seventy-five of them. Well, seventy-four and a half. Then Katniss had destroyed the dome encasing the arena and all hell had broken loose.

"I'm sorry, Annie." She said softly.

"What?" Annie turned in her seat.

"I'm sorry. For everything. It's my fault."

"No, it wasn't." She turned away again and all went silent again.

 

Peeta and Gale were a little stiff with each other at first. Katniss tried to bridge the gap by talking about good times in District 12. The two former best friends got into a heated discussion about who was more talented with the bow. Of course, all knew how great Katniss was.

"Please, you must be out of practice in your life of luxury." Gale said.

"And you behind your desk." She countered.

"I get plenty of practice in."

"Oh, do you? I'll have you know I do too. I can't stay in the house all day."

"I bet I'm better now than ever before."

"I think you need to put your money where your mouth is."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I bet you ten bucks I can hit more targets than you."

He laughed. "Oh, man, Katniss. I've missed you."

She smiled, "I've missed you too."

Finn piped in, "Can I come see?"

"That's up to your mother." Gale said kindly.

All eyes turned to Annie. She was sitting, staring into space. Her mouth moved and no words came out. Finn leaned over and whispered softly to her. Everyone was reminded of his father's same treatment of her so many years before. She blinked a few times and looked over to her son.

"Better, Mom?"

"Yeah." She said softly.

Haymitch said, "It doesn't ever go away."

"That's nice to know." She mumbled.

He passed a cup to her. "This helps me."

"Don't start that." Katniss warned, remembering the one and only time she'd tried his vile concoction.

She passed the cup back to Haymitch. "Thanks, but no thanks." She smiled sadly at the group.

The rest of the meal passed in relative silence. Gale and Katniss set up a time for the shooting competition. Katniss, Peeta, and Haymitch took off for their own rooms.

Annie tucked Finn into bed, which was a rarity.

"Are you okay, Mom?"

"I'm fine."

"What did Haymitch mean when he said it doesn't ever go away? What doesn't go away?"

"You learn about the Hunger Games in school, right?"

He nodded.

"You must have learned that I was one of the victors."

"You and Dad both."

"Haymitch is also a victor. So are Katniss and Peeta."

"I remember."

"It was hard. We… we killed people, Finn. We had to fight for our lives. And it was all for other people's entertainment."

"Is that why you stay in bed all day sometimes?"

"Yes."

"And Dad?"

She brushed his hair back from his head. "Yeah, baby, it is."

"But it's mostly about him, isn't it?"

A tear slipped out of her eye. She sat back and wiped at her cheeks. "Life isn't fair, Finn. You need to learn that early." She stood up and walked out of the room.

"Good night, Mom." He called after her.

She didn't turn. She turned out the light and closed the door.

She walked past the main room and saw that Gale was sitting and staring into nothing. She stopped for a moment. She stared at him.

"You just gonna stare all night?" He suddenly said.

She jumped. Then took a tentative step inside the room. "What is it they used to say? A penny for your thoughts?"

He smiled. "My thoughts aren't important and they're mostly boring."

"I'm sure they're more entertaining than mine."

"I doubt it." He gestured to the chair next to his own. "Want to sit?"

"I should go to bed. The ceremony's early."

"It's only nine."

"Maybe here. I'm used to it being later."

"Yeah, me too. But I usually stay up late."

"It's Katniss, isn't it?"

He smiled. "You're perceptive."

"I know what it's like being in love with someone you can't have. Except, I did have him a little when he was home. He didn't have to completely hide."

"Well, I never had Katniss. In the woods, maybe, but never completely. When she wasn't hung up on him after the games, it was all about keeping her mom and sister alive. But, of course, I was out there to keep my own family alive."

She nodded. "But it changed."

"It did. I don't know when, but one day she wasn't just Catnip."

"'Catnip'?"

He laughed, "Some nickname I gave her when we first met in the woods. It's what I thought she said her name was."

She smiled. "That's kind of sweet. Finnick called me Ann all the time. Annie's my real name, but no one else ever called me Ann. It was sweet."

"I bet it was."

"I don't talk about Finnick much. My son asks me all the time, but I can't…"

"You don't have to."

"Finn deserves to know."

"When the time is right, you'll tell him."

"He's ten, Gale."

"I know. But you should do it on your time."

She was quiet for a minute. Then she spoke softly, "He was a good man."

"A very good man."

She paused, "Katniss still blames herself."

"It's hard seeing people you trust die for you." He said softly.

"Yeah." She sat back and was silent again.

He looked over to see her mouth was moving like it had at dinner. She must be back there at the Games. He watched for a moment, unsure what to do.

"Finnick." She whispered. She looked around the room for a moment, looking lost. Then she remembered where she was when she saw Gale. "I'm sorry." She stood up. "I don't know if I can do this tomorrow."

"I'll be there."

Annie nodded, turned, and walked out of the room without another word.

Gale waited a few more minutes in silence, thinking about Annie. She was unstable and a bit odd. But she was also intelligent. And so sad.

And then there was Finn. He was only ten, but he looked about twice that. Was he that grown-up after his father died? He deserved so much more.

He shook himself. Why was he even thinking about it? He barely knew Annie and he's just met Finn. He went to bed, still thinking about it.


	3. Chapter 3

Annie followed Katniss onto the stage the next morning. The ceremony was being broadcast all over Panem. But it appeared the entire country was packed into the square at the Capitol. The President's mansion was the backdrop to the ceremony.

She draped her arm over her son's shoulders as they sat down. Katniss sat down on her other side and slipped her hand into Peeta's. Annie couldn't help but notice Gale standing stoically in the back corner of the stage. He was wearing a bright white uniform. His jaw was clenched as he looked out on the crowd. What's he thinking about? Annie wondered.

The ceremony started. President Paylor stood at the podium and talked solemnly about the events of ten years before. She even went farther back as she spoke of those lost in the Hunger Games. She spoke of President Show and his reign of terror and oppression.

Then she went on to talk about the ten years of peace. She spoke of the advances made in technology. She spoke of a bright future and all the things being done to ensure that future.

When she was done, she sat down. Gale stepped forward along with another soldier in white. The unknown soldier stepped to the podium Gale stepped to a large bell sitting nearby. The other man started speaking and it took a few words for her to realize he was saying names of those who had lost their lives. Gale struck the bell after every name.

Some she knew. It took a long time for all the names to be called. There were hundreds, thousands. She lost track of time. She stared off into the distance. She barely registered Katniss's hand slipping into hers. And then she completely went away. She was back with Finnick in the days leading up to and after the wedding. She was lying in his arms and whispering of their future.

And she was farther back in the past, stealing moments with him when he was home from the Capitol. Swimming in the ocean, seeing who could swim the farthest. She was laughing. They both were. She was happy in those times, but she was nothing now. She was a shell.

"Mom." Finn shook her gently. "Mom, it's over. Everyone's clearing out."

She didn't respond. She was still in that distant place.

"Mom, please." He whispered. "Everyone's staring."

"Annie?" Katniss said softly.

Still nothing.

Katniss looked around, trying to figure out how to get her help. She made eye contact with Gale. He excused himself politely from his conversation with the president and came over.

He took in the situation as he walked across the stage. He could see Annie had gone catatonic. How long had she been like that? Without being questioned, he easily lifted her into his arms and walked away. Finn, Katniss, and Peeta followed in his wake.

He slipped into the car that was waiting on the curb. Once everyone was seated, he told the driver to take them to the training building. He held the silent woman on his lap. She went limp.

"It's okay, Mom." Finn said softly. "It'll be okay." He said it over and over.

No one else said anything.

Gale absently rubbed a hand up and down her arm. When the car pulled into the building's drive, he carried her inside. They were all still deadly silent as they rode the elevator up. Finn ran ahead and opened the door to her room.

Katniss hurried off to make a call. Peeta stayed in the hall as Gale carried Annie into her room. Finn turned down the blanket. He removed her shoes as Gale went to sit her down.

As soon as his arms released her, Annie began to speak. "Not Finnick. Not my Finnick. No. No, please. Not him." She said it again and again, getting more and more hysterical with every word.

Finn and Gale did everything they could to calm her. She got even worse when she looked at her son. She screamed about Finnick's ghost come back to haunt her.

"Finn, go with Peeta." Gale said softly.

"But, my mom—"

"I got this. Go on."

The boy said to his mom, "I'm just outside."

Gale sat down on the bed and grasped Annie's shoulders. "Calm down, Annie. I need you to calm down. Your son needs you to calm down."

She stopped and swallowed. "My son?"

"Finn. Your son."

"I can't." She started rambling again about Finnick.

It was then that Mrs. Everdeen and a doctor arrived. Mrs. Everdeen gave Annie a shot that soon put her to sleep. The doctor checked her vitals and then stood.

She said, "She should be fine. I'll be by to check her tomorrow. If there's any change, call."

"Thank you. We will." Gale said.

"Should someone sit with her?" Katniss asked.

The doctor said, "It's not entirely necessary, but she should be checked often."

All the adults nodded. The two left to return to the hospital.

Katniss said, "I, um, hate to say it, but I have somewhere I'm required to be."

"Me too." Gale said. He looked over at Finn. "You gonna be okay?"

He nodded.

Gale hated the look on the boy's face. It pulled at his heart. He didn't know why it was happening, but his mouth was moving before he realized it and he said, "I'll be back soon. I promise."

"Okay."

Peeta said, "I can hang out. I don't have anywhere to be." He looked at his wife. "You can fill me in later. It's your thing anyway."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure."

She took his hand and led him out the door.

Gale asked the boy, "You know how to play cards?"

"I know a few games."

"Good. I'll rustle up a deck and we can play for a while later. How does that sound?"

Finn smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes. "Sounds good."

"Okay." He looked at his watch. "I have to go." Gale took a step around him, but Finn stopped him with an unexpected hug. He turned around and patted the boy's back. "I'll see you later, Finn."

"See you later, Gale." He let go and walked slowly over to his mom.

Gale watched the scene for a few moments before he turned and left. He walked in on a very affectionate good-bye between Katniss and Peeta. He gritted his teeth and walked past them. How could he still feel so strongly for Katniss after all these years? And what was going on with Finn and Annie?

Katniss ran to catch the elevator with him. She took in the look on his face. "Are you okay?"

"I don't know." He mumbled.

"Finn likes you."

He was silent for a moment and then said, "He's me."

Before she could respond, the elevator opened and he stepped out.

Gale sat through the meeting with the heads of state and paid only the barest attention. All he could think about was Annie. She was so broken. She had lost everything. Was it harder losing the one you loved the most and never seeing him again? Or was it more difficult to see her kissing another man?

He gazed across the room at Katniss. She was paying very close attention and taking notes. Were they just for her or to help her remember to tell Peeta later? She spoke. He didn't register what she said, but he heard her voice. Did she still sing? Did the birds still stop?

When the meeting was finally over, Gale paid all the niceties to the officials and spoke with all the necessary people. Then he excused himself and hurried back. He stopped at a random shop that looked like it had a little of everything and found a plain deck of playing cards.

Peeta and Finn were silently watching TV when he walked in.

He waved the cards. "Found some."

The boy smiled. "That's nice."

"After supper we'll play for a while, okay?"

"Okay."

He sat down in a chair and watched silently with them. He looked over at Peeta a few times and thought bitter thoughts about how he was better that the baker in so many ways. He was just thinking about how much better a provider he was when Katniss came in and curled up beside the other man.

Gale stood abruptly and said, "I'll go check on Annie." He left the room in a rush.

She was lying there still. Not much change as far as he could see. Her lips moved, but no sound came out. He stepped closer to see if he could see more clearly. She let out a long breath and turned her head away.

"I think she's dreaming about my dad." Finn said from behind him.

He turned. "I hope it's all good."

"Me too."

"I don't know much about him. Every time I ask, she says she'll tell me later or she changes the subject. All I know is what she talks about in her sleep or what others tell me. They say that no one really knew him except her. Katniss has told me a bit."

"He was a good man. He was a good fighter."

"She said that too. But there's more to him than that. There has to be."

"Well, he loved your mom. Everyone could see that. He was nothing until we brought her to District 13. And she was so much better when he was around. He could always calm her the way you do; bring her out of being lost to the Games."

"The Games weren't fair."

"No, they weren't. I almost lost my best friend to them." He added in head, I did in the end, I suppose.

"Katniss?"

He smiled sadly, "Katniss." He clapped the boy on the shoulder. "Come on, it's got to be time for supper. I don't know about you, but I'm starved."

They all ate together again. Gale and Katniss talked a bit about Finnick with his son. They were starting to move on to other subjects when Peeta surprised them.

He said, "Finnick really liked my cake."

Katniss smiled and ran a hand down his cheek. "Yeah."

"What cake?" Finn asked.

"You parents' wedding cake." Peeta said. "I decorated it for them. It was like the ocean. There were fish. I barely remember the reality of that time, but I remember that. It was the first time I felt like me." He looked down. His hand shook as he gripped his fork tightly. He was fighting a flashback.

Katniss reached out and rested a hand on his arm. He looked over at her.

"I'm back." He said softly after a moment.

The rest of the meal was eaten in silence. Katniss and Peeta left not long after the meal was over. Gale took out the deck of cards and shuffled.

As he dealt them out, he started talking, "So how are you in school?"

The boy shrugged.

Gale smiled, "What does that mean?"

"I'm not the best."

"But you're not the worst?"

He shook his head. "I'm pretty good in math. And I can fish better than anyone."

"That's great."

"But I'm not great at spelling."

"Not everyone is. I'm better at math too."

"What happened to Peeta earlier? He looked like he was going away like my mom, but it looked worse."

"I think it's pretty much the same. He was taken by President Snow. You've learned about him, right?"

He nodded.

"Well, he had his men do something to Peeta. They gave him false memories and made him think Katniss was bad. They made him think everyone associated with her was bad too. It was hard to get him back; it took a long time. Sometimes he goes back to the torture he was put through. Sometimes he goes back to hating Katniss."

"How could anyone hate Katniss?"

It was an innocent question, but Gale knew a few ways he disliked his old friend. He was starting to like her again, but it was still difficult. If they were actually alone together, he knew they would be uncomfortable and their words would be forced. There would probably even be a fight.

He wasn't looking forward to the shooting match tomorrow. Maybe they'd bring Finn and Peeta along. He could be civil in front of them. Well, he could be civil in front of Finn. There's plenty he'd like to say to Peeta that he'd held back.

He remembered the question and said, "The Old Capitol did. She was a threat."

"Because she was the Mockingjay."

He smiled. "Right."

They talked about math for a while and then Gale asked Finn his favorite thing about fishing. That got the boy talking with hardly a break for almost an hour.

Gale looked at his watch. "What time do you go to bed?"

"Nine." Finn answered.

"Well, it looks like it's that time."

"One more hand?" he begged.

Gale sighed, "Just one."

They played one more hand. Gale won.

"I demand a rematch." The boy said as he stood from the table.

"Maybe tomorrow." He squeezed the boy's shoulder as he followed him out the room.

He waited outside as the boy changed into pajamas and brushed his teeth. Finn opened the door when he was done. Gale walked in and stood beside the bed.

"My mom doesn't put me to bed most nights." He admitted.

"Why is that?" Gale asked, sitting down on the edge of the bed.

"She goes to bed early sometimes." He shook his head. "That's a lie. She goes to bed early almost every night."

Surprising himself, Gale reached out and ran a hand over the boy's hair. "She's had a tough life, Finn."

"I know." His voice was thick when he said, "But I have too. It's like I don't even have a mom most of the time."

He had no idea what to say to that.

Finn swallowed. "But it's not like that all the time. Sometimes she's a great mom. She comes out fishing with me when she's not down. She taught me how to swim. We have races."

Gale smiled, "That's good." He ruffled the by's hair. "Good night, kid. I'll see you in the morning."

"Will you check on my mom?"

"I will." He stood up and walked to the door. "Light on or off?"

"Off, please."

He flipped off the light. "Good night, Finn."

"Good night, Gale."

He closed the door and then leaned his forehead against the door frame. Why was he being pulled to help Finn so much? And Annie too? What could he do? He wasn't Finnick. Annie would never trust him the way she'd trusted her one love.

He walked to her room. She was still passed out. Her mouth was turned down and her brow puckered. He walked over and kneeled beside the bed.

He whispered, "Good dreams, my friend. Think of the good times."

There was no change in her. He was a fool to think he could change her dreams just by whispering about them, but his mother used to do it when his younger brothers and sister were having nightmares. She said she used to do it for him to when he was smaller. She said it helped, but it didn't look like it did for Annie.

He stood and turned away. He'd check on her later. He went to the living room and turned on the TV for the noise. He fell asleep on the couch.


	4. Chapter 4

Gale arrived at breakfast the next morning to see Finn looking forlorn and picking at his food.

"Hey, what's going on?" He asked as he took his seat.

"My mom's still in bed. I asked her if she wanted breakfast, but she said she didn't feel like eating."

"It's not the first time, is it?"

The boy shook his head.

"Katniss and I have our competition today. You wanna come watch?"

"I don't know."

"I think your mom will be okay."

"You don't know."

"No, I don't." He watched the boy for a few moments and then asked, "Want me to go talk with her?"

"You could try. But I don't think she'll say much. If she says anything at all."

"Okay, I'll go see." He got up and walked to Annie's room. He knocked on the door. There was no sound from inside. He pushed it open. "Annie?"

No response.

He stepped in the room and saw the woman lying on her side, staring off into nothing. "Are you okay?"

She blinked and looked at him like she'd never seen him before. Then she looked away again without a word.

"Would it be all right if Finn came with me to the range? Katniss and I are having a competition."

"I don't mind." She said softly.

"Do you need anything?"

She said so softly he wasn't sure he heard it entirely, "The pain to go away."

His heart clenched at the words. He knew how she felt. "If you need anything, call someone? Please?"

She nodded, still staring into nothing.

"We'll be back later."

She said nothing again.

He walked out of the room. He smiled at Finn. "She said yes."

"She talked to you?"

He thought about what she'd actually said, but only told Finn, "She didn't say much."

"She never does. Sometimes she rambles on about water and tridents and fishing."

"I'm sorry, Finn."

They finished eating their breakfast and then went out to the shooting range. Gale smiled at the fancy bow he saw in Katniss's hands. He knew it had been designed especially for her. He told Finn this as they walked up.

"What about yours?" the boy asked, gesturing to the bow he carried.

"Not as special as hers, but still as beautiful."

"Who's beautiful?" Peeta asked, wrapping a protective arm around his wife's waist.

"My bow." Gale said. He took in the quiver of arrows on the floor. "Are those mine?"

"Yes." Katniss said. "The targets are set at twenty, forty, and eighty yards. One set for each of us. You have three arrows for each target." She smiled, "You ready."

"I'm always ready, Catnip."

She laughed and nudged his arm.

They took turns shooting at each of their three targets. When they were done, Katniss whispered to her bow, "Goodnight." And put it into its case.

The four of them walked up to tally the scores.

Both got all three of their arrows in the bull's eye of the first. On the second one, Katniss got two in the bull's eye and one just slightly out of center. Only one of Gale's hit center while the other two landed just slightly on the outside.

The last target decided it all. Gale hit just outside of center in a nice cluster. Katniss hit the bull's eye dead on with two while the third was just outside.

"Well, I think that proves that I'm still better." She boasted.

"I'm not too far off." Gale said, placing his arrows back in his quiver.

"No, not too far." She agreed, putting her own arrows away.

Mrs. Everdeen walked into the room. "I was told I would find you all here."

"What's going on, Mother?" Katniss asked.

"Finn, your mother was looking for you."

"Is she okay?" he asked, walking up to her, remembering she had come from the hospital the night before.

"She's fine. She just wants you to come back to your rooms."

Peeta spoke up, "I'll bring you back." He put his arm around the boy's shoulders and walked with him out the door.

Gale asked, "What happened?"

The older woman explained, "She called the hospital saying some odd things about 'feeling the pull' and that she didn't know where she was. She sounded off. I went to see her because I was free. She said she needed her son, that he was here. I gave her something to calm her and then came here."

"She's all right now?"

"I think so." She looked at her watch. "I need to get back." She turned without another word.

Gale leaned against the wall. "Your mother seems well."

"I suppose she's as well as she can be."

"You mean since I killed your sister?"

"I wasn't the one who said it."

"Maybe it wouldn't have happened if you had kept playing their game."

"You'd rather I was dead?"

"You know, sometimes I feel like it would be better."

"What does that mean?"

"Sometimes it just feels like it would be easier to let you go."

"You mean if I were completely gone? You think it was an easy choice to make for me?"

"You tell me. Is it better having a guy who wants to kill you half the time?"

"It's not his fault."

"Right."

"Are you saying it's my fault? I wanted him out Gale. But it wasn't my choice to make. It was him or Finnick."

"And look what happened to Finnick. Doesn't matter in the end, does it? Everyone that matters to someone is dead."

"Yeah and I might as well be, right?" She brushed past him and out of the room.

He followed, "That's not what I meant, Katniss."

She rounded, "So what did you mean?"

"That I hurt every day thinking about how I lost you." He took in a deep breath and let it out. "Annie is so lost. Knowing that you're actually alive and well makes it a little better, but not much. You're still not mine."

"I'm sorry, Gale. Peeta and I…we understand each other better than you and I do."

"Because of the Games?"

"Yes."

"I thought we understood each other after helping keep each other alive for four years. Working to keep our families alive."

"Don't, Gale. It's different. You weren't in that arena."

"We fought together in the battle."

"And your bombs killed my sister."

He clenched his teeth and pounded his fist into the wall. "It wasn't my fault, Katniss. I never thought they'd use it against our own people."

"But they did." She turned and started walking away.

He called after her, "I thought all was forgiven."

"Yeah, I did too."

He stood watching her retreating form. Then he walked slowly towards the old tribute training center. He walked up the stairs, not wanting to bother with the elevator.

As he walked by the living room, he saw Annie and Finn sitting together on the couch watching TV. Katniss and Peeta were curled up together on the love seat.

Gale shook his head and walked to his room, slamming the door behind him. He collapsed on his bed and stared up at the ceiling. Why did all of this still hurt so bad?

 

Gale walked out of his room when he heard the sounds of the group talking softly in the dining room down the hall. He walked in and stood in the door.

He looked at Katniss and asked, "Could I have a moment?"

She stood and walked out into the hall. "Yes?"

"I'm sorry for all I said. I don't wish you were dead. I'm sorry my bombs were used to hurt someone you love. And I'm really sorry for all I said earlier." He looked her in the eyes. "Do you have a good life?"

"As good as can be expected, I suppose."

"Then I'm happy for you." He clenched his jaw. These words were so hard for him to say. "And I hope we can continue to work this out."

She wrapped her arms around his waist unexpectedly. "I've missed you." She whispered. "I've missed you so much."

He wrapped his arms around her. "Me too, Katniss."


	5. Chapter 5

"Finnick, the night is beautiful." Annie said softly, almost sang, as she walked down the hall. "Come and see."

Gale sat up as he heard the one-sided conversation. He walked out his door and saw Annie walking slowly with her hand trailing along the wall. She turned at the end of the hall and retraced her steps.

"Annie?" he said softly.

"Finnick?" She turned. She saw Gale standing there in the dark. "Finnick, there you are."

"It's not Finnick, it's Gale. Gale Hawthorn."

She kept on smiling. "Want to go for a swim? It's the perfect night for it."

"Come on, Annie, let's get you back to bed."

"No, I want to swim."

"We can't swim here, Annie. There's no pool."

"I want to taste the salt water on your lips." She pressed herself close to him. "Come on, Finnick." She pressed herself up and tried to kiss him.

He gently pushed her away, "Whoa, now. Let's not do that."

She leaned against the wall and pouted. "You don't want to kiss me? You said you liked my kisses. You liked them because they were real. You don't get paid for them except in my love."

"That's all very sweet, but let's get you back to bed." He held her elbow and walked with her down the hall to her opened door.

"Yes, Finnick, get me back to bed." She wrapped arms around his neck as they walked through the door.

Gale tripped over her and they tumbled onto the bed.

Annie laughed and pressed a kiss to his shocked mouth. He pushed up away from her and managed to get out of her grasp long enough to get her properly in the bed.

She grabbed his arm in a surprisingly strong grip. "Come to bed, Finnick. You've been gone too long." She tugged him down onto the mattress beside her.

He tried to extract himself from her grasp, but she wrapped her arms firmly around him and they grew tighter whenever he tried to move.

"No, you can't leave again." She burrowed into him and pulled the blanket up over them.

"Well, I suppose a few minutes won't hurt." He mumbled.

She sighed, "Finnick, I've missed you."

"I'm not Finnick, I'm Gale."

"You're always such a joker." She pressed another kiss to his mouth.

He clamped his mouth shut and awkwardly patted her back. When she pulled away, he said, "Just go to sleep… Ann."

She smiled and drifted off.

He felt her body go slack and he tried to work his way out of her arms.

But she tightened them again, holding him in place once more.

He waited a few more minutes and she fell into her deeper sleep again, her arms loosening around him. He tried to extract himself once more and she once again pulled him tight to her.

She started talking softly then. "Do you remember the night after I was rescued?"

Gale wasn't sure if he should say anything, so he remained silent.

"You remember you held me? You told me I was safe again."

He didn't have control of his mouth. He whispered, "You are."

She kissed him again. "You told me you loved me."

He swallowed. "I'm sure."

"That you only ever loved me."

"I'm sure Finnick loved you dearly."

"You're Finnick, silly."

"Annie, please wake up." He gently shook her. "It's Gale, not Finnick."

"Again with the jokes." She slowly dozed off again with a smile on her lips.

Finn walked into the room, rubbing his eyes. "Hey, Mom, are you okay? I heard you talking—" He broke off when he saw the man in his mother's arms. He asked in a high, angry voice, "What is going on?"

Annie shot up. She looked at her son and then down at Gale. "What is going on?"

Gale turned pink around the ears he explained about encountering her in the hallway. He talked about her sleepwalking. He told her about talking in her sleep and thinking he was her late husband. Every time he said Finnick's name, Annie flinched. And with every new explanation, Finn grew more and more angry.

She let the tale sink in and then asked, "Did I say or do anything embarrassing?"

He hesitated, looking from mother to son and then back. He said softly, "You kissed me."

"Get out Gale!" Finn suddenly demanded.

"Finn." Annie warned. "You aren't the one that has the say."

"Mom, he took advantage of you."

"Believe me, kid, I was the one taken advantage of." Gale tried to tease.

"That's not funny." The boy said flatly.

"Sorry." He looked to Annie. "I'm really sorry. I know he loved you."

"You don't know anything about my father."

Gale looked over at the boy. His hands were clinched into fists at his sides. His face was set in an angry mask.

He said softly, "No, I don't."

"You have no right to be in my mom's room."

"Finn, calm yourself." Annie warned. "This really isn't your business."

"You're my mom."

"I'm the adult." She looked at Gale. "You swear I didn't do anything other than kiss you?"

"I promise." Gale said softly, resisting the urge to reach out and touch her.

"Then I think this is over."

"Yeah, get out, Gale." Finn demanded.

"Finn, don't be rude." Annie admonished.

"He needs to go."

"I'm gone." Gale got up off the bed and made his way to the door. "If you need anything, I'm just down the hall."

Annie nodded.

Finn glared daggers at him.

"Finn, you don't speak to adults like that." She said as she got off the bed and walked over to him.

"Like what?"

"The way you're speaking to me now. It's disrespectful and uncalled for."

"He was in your bed, Mom."

"I'm an adult and I can take care of myself." She turned him by his shoulders. "Back to bed, young man."

Gale was still standing in the wall when they walked out of her room. He stood awkwardly and watched the two disappear into Finn's room. A minute later she walked back out. He took a step toward her.

"Good night, Gale." She said, trying to walk into her room.

"Wait." He said. He took a step toward her.

She stopped, but didn't look at him. "What?"

"I'm sorry. I really am. If I could go back and sacrifice myself in his place, I would."

She turned her head and looked at him. Her eyes were dead. "You don't mean that."

"I do."

She shook her head and went back into her room, shutting the door firmly behind her.

Gale went back to his room and lied down. He looked up at the ceiling. He did mean it. So many times he wished himself dead. He had only told Katniss he wished her dead to hurt her. He didn't say the truth. He wasn't sure how he would have been received if he had told the truth.

But he felt he could tell Annie. He could admit the truth. He was hurting inside just as she was. He recognized the look in her eyes as the one he felt burning in his chest. He kept his expressions pretty stony and held his emotions close. But when Gale looked at Annie, he almost let it all out.

 

Annie lay in her bed. There was a part of her that really wanted to trust Gale. Part of her that felt he was like her. Should she believe he was telling the truth when he said he'd switch places with her Finnick?

"Tell me what to do." She whispered. "You were the one who always told me what was best. What's best now?"

She waited for the answer she knew would never come from his lips, but always wished would. She missed his voice far more than she missed anything else about him. She had his face smiling at her every day when she looked at her son. But she didn't have his voice as calm as the gentle waves rolling into shore.

Annie rolled onto her side and sobbed, "Why couldn't you take me with you? Why won't you come for me now?"

She cried until she fell asleep from the exhaustion.


	6. Chapter 6

_The water was rising quickly. So many kids screamed. Annie's instinct took over. She didn't think; she just moved her arms and legs, staying afloat. For a second she could almost imagine she was back in District 4, out there in the ocean with her friends._

_But then the screams came back to her. Fewer and fewer. A cry for help. A cry for someone's mom. And then nothing but Annie breathing hard and swimming for her life. Her arms eventually gave out. She rolled onto her back and floated, waiting for the water to take her down._

_And then a pair of strong arms were around her. The voice of her mentor murmured, "I have you, Ann. It's okay. You're alive. You're the Victor, for what it's worth."_

Annie woke up, but kept her eyes closed tightly, grasping at the edges of the dream and Finnick's voice in her ear telling her she was alive.

She blinked her eyes open, tears falling onto her pillow. So many times since the day she entered the arena she wished it had all ended that day they sent in the water. She had wished for death. She knew it was selfish, especially in the years since her son's birth, but she couldn't stop the thoughts. They helped her deal with the pain.

She forced herself out of bed as she did so many mornings. There was never a day that went by that she didn't feel the pain. It was just that some days it was easier to push it away and pretend to be a real person.

Today was one of those days. And as she showered and made herself up for the day, she told herself over and over, "You're alive for a reason. You are a Victor of the Hunger Games. For what it's worth. You're a mother. Someone depends on you. Be a proper mother. Get out there and do something to make him proud of you today."

She looked in the mirror and took a deep breath and let it out. She tried to smile, but it looked as painful and forced as it was. It dropped to a frown, but that didn't work either. She resigned herself to somewhere in between. It still didn't feel real, but it was what she had in all the blankness of her life.

Annie looked over to her bed. She felt the pull of her depression. It would have been so easy to just kick off her shoes and climb back under the blankets and let the world disappear. She stood there and argued with herself for several minutes before she turned on her heel and quickly walked out of the door, closing it forcefully behind her.

She walked to Finn's room and knocked.

"Who's there?"

"Your mother." She said. "Let me in please."

"It's open."

She opened the door and stepped in. Her son was sitting on his bed, tying his shoes. She pulled up a chair from the desk and say in front of him.

"What?" He asked, taking in the look on her face.

"I don't appreciate the way you spoke with Gale last night." She said.

Finn said nothing, focusing on tying his shoe.

"Did you hear what I said?"

"Yeah, I did." the boy snapped.

"Don't speak to me like that, Finn. That's exactly what I'm talking about. You need to learn how to speak to adults."

"Well, you don't talk much."

She took a moment to let the sting from the comment go away. "I'm sorry for that. I promise to work a little better." She thought for a moment and then said, "Would you speak to your teacher the way you spoke to Gale last night?"

"If my teacher was in your bed, I probably would."

"Well, that's unacceptable. Who I have in my bed is none of your business. Nothing is happening between Gale and me. Nothing is happening between me and anyone. And if it were, I would tell you about it. I certainly wouldn't invite a man to my bed."

He snorted.

She swallowed and looked at her hands. "I'm not entirely right in my head, Finn. I haven't been in a long time. And I'm sorry that you had to be born into this. I never planned to raise a child on my own. This is so hard for me. I need you to help me. And I need you to start with apologizing to Gale about last night."

The boy clenched his teeth together and nodded.

"Come on." She tugged on his arm and pulled him out the door.

They found Gale in the dining room.

"Gale, Finn has something he wants to say to you." Annie prompted.

"I'm sorry for the way I spoke to you last night." He mumbled.

"It's all right. My dad's gone, too. I think I would have reacted the same way if I walked in on a man in my mom's bed."

He nodded.

The three ate in silence. After he was done, Annie sent Finn back to his room.

"But I apologized." He protested.

"You're still grounded for today."

"Now you decided to be a real mom." He said, slamming out of the room.

She stared off into space, feeling the pull again for the second time that morning.

"Annie?" Gale asked softly.

"He's right. Why should I start being a mother now?" She stood and walked toward the door.

"Don't do that, Annie." He called.

She stopped and turned. "I wish I would have died in the arena."

He said nothing.

"You said you would have replaced Finnick. I would put myself in the place of any of those other twenty-three kids."

"It wasn't fair what they did."

"No, it wasn't. But they got away with it for seventy-five years."

"They did." He got up and walked over to her. He placed a hand on her shoulder. "Annie."

She jumped. "I don't know why I'm telling you all this. I've never talked about the Games with anyone but Finnick."

"Well he understood better, I'm sure."

"It's not that. Mags and some of the others, we used to have a sort of support group. But I never said anything at the meetings. There was plenty of opportunity, but I couldn't. I saved it for Finnick." She took a shaky breath, "I don't think it was a good idea to come here."

Impulsively, he reached up and cupped her cheek, stroking it with his thumb. "Words cannot express how sorry I am for all that you've lost."

She put her hand on top of his, bringing it to a stop. "Same to you. I know how it hurts to see Katniss with Peeta."

He opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted.

"Somebody say my name?" Peeta asked from the door.

The pair turned, jumping apart as thought they were doing something wrong.

Gale smiled, "The world doesn't revolve around you, bread boy."

Peeta smiled indulgently. "Ha ha."

Katniss patted his back and then turned to Annie. "So, I was wondering if you wanted to get out and get some air."

Annie looked between the other three adults. "I really don't know."

"It would be just us." Katniss assured her.

"Finn is grounded. I really should stay and make sure he doesn't leave his room."

Gale said, "I can do that if you want to go out."

She gave him an uncertain look.

Peeta said, "Are you kidding? Gale can't be trusted with children."

"Wanna bet?" the other man challenged.

Katniss broke in, "Boys, don't start."

Gale smiled at his friend. He wanted to work on mending his friendship with Katniss. And to do that, he would work on being friends with Peeta. This was a challenge. But he'd meet it and excel. He would make it so. At least, he'd work to become civil with his friend's husband.

Gale said, "Sure, we'll hang out here. We can turn on some trashy TV and make fun of it."

"Sounds like fun." He walked into the living room and flopped down on the couch. He stretched out and picked up the remote.

Gale turned to Annie. "I'll make sure he doesn't leave his room, I promise."

"Good." She said softly. "Thank you." She pushed herself upon her toes and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

They shared a smile. It didn't meet her eyes, but it was enough to make her look years younger.

"See you soon." Katniss called to Peeta.

He waved absently.

"See you later." Gale said to the women.

They chorused their goodbyes and walked to the elevator.

Gale walked into the living room and stole the remote.

"Hey!" Peeta protested.

"This is my TV."

"It's the Capitol's TV."

"Well it's on my floor." He sat down in a chair and propped his feet on the coffee table.

The two melted into a genial conversation and trashy entertainment.


	7. Chapter 7

"So how are you these days, Annie?" Katniss asked as they walked around the small park across from the training center.

"I'm as well as I can be, I guess." Annie wrapped her arms around herself and looked at the ground.

"Yeah, me too."

She looked up at her and then back down. She asked softly, "What can you tell me about Gale? What kind of man is he?"

She smiled, "I'm sure he's as good today as he was when we were in District 12 together."

"He's really good with Finn."

"Yeah, he's great with kids. Always has been."

"You still resent him for what happened?" She asked.

Katniss was silent for a while before she said, "I'm trying to get over it. I know _he_ didn't do it, but the bomb was his idea. They used it against so many innocent people. They used it against children. Coin used it against them."

"They killed plenty of kids in the Games all those years. What was a few dozen more?"

"How can you say something like that?"

"If the Games were still going on, my son would be two years away from his first reaping."

"I know."

She sat down heavily on a bench. "I'm glad my son no longer has to live in fear of fighting to the death. I'm glad I never have to know the fear of a mother waiting for her child's name to be drawn from that bowl." She put her face in her hands. She whispered, "Katniss, sometimes I wish he'd never been born at all." She looked up desperately. "I'm a horrible mother, aren't I?"

Katniss sat down beside her and stared off into the distance, thinking. "You're not. Peeta keeps telling me we're ready for children. But what sort of parents are we? I have horrible nightmares almost every night. I wake up screaming. And Peeta? He has flashbacks of his hijacking. I've seen his eyes turn from loving to murderous and back again in a matter of seconds. No child needs to experience that."

"They learn about the Games and the Rebellion in school."

"But how can we tell them our experience? Do you talk to Finn?"

She shook her head. "Sometimes he has questions. I only tell him what I can. But it's not enough. I just tell him that I won. He learns how I won from his teachers in school. How I went crazy. I can't relive it." Annie shivered, even in the warm air. "I relive it enough in my dreams every night. Or when I go away like I did at the ceremony."

She nodded. "I know what you mean. That's why I don't want children."

"Peeta doesn't get that?"

"I don't think so. But I think he can handle it better than me, even though he was more damaged."

"You were the one on the pedestal all that time. You're the one they'll ask about more because they'll hear of you more."

Katniss looked at her. "So you don't tell Finn anything at all? Not even about Finnick?"

Annie's face changed at the mention of her late husband. She stared off into the distance, looking over the years. "How do I make him real without hurting myself?"

"Maybe the hurting can lead to healing. And you can move on."

She turned her head, coming back to the present.

"Maybe with Gale. He deserves someone as kind as you. And you deserve someone as patient as him. And Finn deserves someone steady. You all can help each other."

"I'm not ready for another lover, another husband."

"Then just add him to growing list of friends."

"Yes, I suppose." She paused, "So tell me more about him."

"You want to hear about the day we met?"

"Sure."

"My father took me into the woods when I was small. He taught me how to shoot my first bow. He taught me how to hunt. After his death, I went out into the woods alone. I was so scared I didn't go very far. I came across this trap on my way back. As I was examining it, he spoke, warning me, scaring me. I looked at him and I saw…" She swallowed. She hadn't really told anyone this before. Why Annie? Why not? "I thought he was really handsome." Her cheeks turned red. "I remembered him from the ceremony honoring our fathers' deaths in the mines. I hadn't really looked at him that day. But the day in the woods was different. When he told me the trap was his, I realized he could help me save my family. With his traps and my shooting combined, we would never starve. And that, added with his strong features, made him so perfect to me."

"So when did he become just your friend?" Annie asked, intrigued.

"It wasn't long after. When I realized I'd just be Catnip to him and not Katniss. Even though I was teaching him to shoot, I was still just an annoying kid."

"But he fell for you."

"He did. And a part of me started falling for him all over again."

Annie wanted to challenge her about choosing Peeta over Gale, but seeing the love and connection she shared with her husband, she thought better of it. "He still has it bad for you."

Katniss smiled, "Did he tell you that?"

"He didn't have to. I know what that looks like." Annie stood up. "Shouldn't we get back?"

"Do you want to?"

"I should check on Finn."

"Do you not trust Peeta and Gale?"

"Do you really trust they'll both be alive when we get back?"

She laughed, "Hard to say."

Annie looked around with a slight lost look. "I wish Finnick were here."

"I know. He was a great fighter. He was a great friend. And I know he loved you with every fiber of his being."

"It's not fair. None of this is fair." She started sobbing and dropped back onto the bench.

Katniss sat for a moment watching the other woman. She was uncertain what to do.

Annie started rocking gently as she cried and then she went very still and silent.

"Annie?" Katniss asked gently.

She continued to stare stonily ahead.

Katniss looked around. There was no one there. Most of the people were at work or preparing for the evening's last hurrah. A dance was to be held as a final ceremony. The dinner the previous night was a success. Katniss remembered seeing the strained look on Annie's face all night. And she had left early.

Had it been a mistake to force Annie to come here and be involved in all this? Had Katniss only made it worse by pushing her to come? Or was this how she always was?

And just as suddenly as the episode started, it stopped. Annie turned her head and looked at Katniss beside her as though she had forgotten she even existed. She blinked a few times, clearing her vision.

"Annie, are you okay?" Katniss asked softly.

She nodded. "I think it's time to get back." She stood and walked back toward the building.

They made the journey in silence.

When they stepped off the elevator and walked toward the living room, they heard the sounds of male laughter surrounding differing degrees of belches.

"That was a good one, Finn." They heard Gale say enthusiastically.

The women peeked their heads around the door frame as another large burp echoed around the room.

"Peeta." Katniss said, shocked.

The man looked contrite as his wife gave him a disgusted look.

The other two suppressed laughs.

Annie gave them both hard looks, sobering them.

Gale looked from the boy to his mother and said, "I'm sorry, Annie. I, um… Finn seemed very remorseful when I went to check on him."

"I hardly ever follow through with my punishments." She said softly.

"So no harm done?" he asked hopefully.

She shook her head. She looked at Katniss, "Thank you for the walk." She turned and walked out of the room, closing her door firmly behind her.

Finn's face went from joyous to crestfallen. "She does that sometimes."

Gale asked, "Should I go talk with her?"

"Won't do you any good." He walked out. They heard him close his own door.

"Well, there goes the fun." Peeta said softly.

"Yeah." Gale said. He looked at Katniss, "What happened?"

She shrugged. "She froze up suddenly. But it was sort of my fault. We were talking about the Games. It's a hard subject to avoid. It's a gigantic part of our history."

He nodded.

"Maybe you _should_ try talking to her. You never know what it might do."

"Yeah."

"See you later?"

"Sure." He left the room and knocked on Annie's door.

She opened it. "There's nothing you can say, Gale. I'm a horrible mother."

"No, you're not. You do the best you can."

"You don't know."

"No, I don't. But I've seen how much you love your son. He's still alive and well. He's thriving."

She smiled sadly. "He is. If only Finnick could see him."

"I'm sure he does."

"You believe in an afterlife? One where people can look down on us?"

"I'd like to."

"It's a nice thought."

"It is." He paused. "You going to the dance thing?"

"I don't know if it's such a good idea. All those people watching, waiting for poor, unstable Annie Cresta to do something. And I've never done well with crowds since my victory."

He nodded. "Then let's just eat dinner here and then play cards or something."

"I like the sound of that." She said with a smile. "I want to make it an early night. The train leaves early."

"Sure. Me too. I have to get back to my job."

"You should make an appearance at the dance. People are going to talk."

"About you and me, you mean?"

"Yes."

He shrugged and gave her a secretive grin, "Let them."

She laughed. "Okay. You, me, and Finn?"

"Yes."

"Good."

"I'll arrange for dinner."

"And I'll go talk to my son."

The evening was fun for all. Finn said so many times that it was the best night of his life. He mostly loved that his mother seemed so normal.

He groaned when Annie sent him to bed early. "I can sleep on the train, Mom."

"You can sleep now, Finn."

"But, Mom."

"But, nothing. Go to bed."

He sighed and went away.

Annie and Gale sat together quietly for a few moments.

Gale said, "I've liked getting to know you, Annie."

"I have too, Gale."

He looked at her with a little uncertainty. Then he said, "Can I call you?"

She smiled, "What do you want to call me?"

He laughed and looked away, embarrassed.

"I'd love it if you would call me. I'm at home all the time. I'm not always exactly there, but if I hear the phone, I'll answer."

"I hope you're there when I call. I like this Annie better than the other one."

She smiled. "I do too." She paused. "It doesn't ever go away completely. But when I'm around you, it seems a little easier." Then she got up and left the room calling out, "Good night, Gale."

"Good night, Annie." He whispered to himself, "You make it seem easier too."


	8. Chapter 8

It was the longest train ride Gale had taken in a long time. He gathered his things and made the short walk home that evening. He unlocked his apartment and stepped in.

"Honey, I'm home." He said softly, dropping his things by the door and kicking off his boots.

He stepped into the small living room and looked around. There were a few discarded dishes he hadn't felt like picking up before he left. He cleaned up after himself, turning on the TV for noise. He rarely turned it on and actually watched it. It was his only actual companion.

Not that he never went out. He had a few girls on hand to have a good time with. But he never brought them home because he didn't feel like making a commitment. And he felt that once their feet crossed the threshold, that's what he was doing: committing.

And it was lonely. Sometimes he considered getting a dog or a cat. But he often spent long hours at work and he worried the pet would be neglected. He'd never be home to give them attention.

That's also part of the reason he never worked harder on finding a wife. Katniss would have been worth the sacrifices made to work. But he didn't think anyone else worthy of that. His work was what mattered. And he would gladly take on more and let those with families go home early or get a day off.

He was known to sometimes work for two weeks or more, fourteen or eighteen hour days, before he took a day off so that a coworker could spend time with her sick children or visit his elderly mother. His own mother often called him wondering when he's be coming to see them as a result.

Thinking about calls led his eyes to the telephone sitting beside the couch. He had promised to keep in touch with Annie and Finn, with Katniss and Peeta. But he didn't think they would be home yet. He wasn't sure if they really wanted him to call tonight.

He turned off the TV and went to bed. He had to get up early and make up for the days he'd been gone.

As he was settling in to bed, the phone he had been so worried about just minutes before rang. He hurried into the living room and picked it up. It was Annie's voice that greeted him.

"I just wondered if you'd made it back home." She said softly.

"Yes, I did."

She gave a small laugh, "Yes, obviously."

"How was your trip?"

"It was good. Finn wasn't really happy to leave the Capitol and get back to school."

"What kid likes school?"

"I did." She said, a twinge of guilt in her voice.

"I didn't mean anything by that. There were things about school I liked. But mostly, I wanted to be out in the woods."

"I think Finn would be happy to live in the ocean."

"If only he could grow gills, huh?"

She laughed, "Yes. And I would join him. Sometimes the sea seems better with the fish rather than people. Fish don't judge. They don't know about my past."

"Neither do the trees." He said softly.

"I'll let you go. I bet you have work in the morning."

"I do, but it doesn't matter."

She hesitated. "I like the sound of your voice, Gale. It's calm."

"So is yours, Annie."

"Thank you. No one ever told me that. Most of them think I sound mad."

"You just lose yourself sometimes. That doesn't make you mad."

"I think you always know how to make me feel better. I'm glad we've forged this friendship. And I hope we continue it."

"Me too."

"And now I really will let you go. You have work and Finn has school."

"Good night, Annie."

"Good night, Gale."

 

Gale got back into the daily grind. He became swamped with backlogged work. He went in at five in the morning and sometimes didn't return until after nine that night. He felt the need to pick up the slack in apology for his days gone, even though he was told by his superiors that he didn't need to.

He went to meeting after meeting, drinking gallons of coffee a day. It had become an addiction for him when he started at District 2. It barely helped him anymore. He supposed his body was too used to it to effect his wakefulness. But it still craved it.

One late night, several weeks after the ceremony, Gale sat in his apartment on a Saturday night. He had the next day off, but he'd brought a pile of paperwork home with him. He had been told not to come in the next day; to take some time off, if only it was a day. He hadn't taken a day off since he'd gotten back nearly two months before.

He rubbed his face and looked up at the clock on his wall. It was only a little after seven. He'd been shoved out the door by his commanding officer and hour before. His stomach rumbled.

"Food." He said, standing up and heading to the kitchen. He looked in his refrigerator. There was nothing.

"Guess I'm going out." He sighed. "I need friends."

He walked to a diner close to his apartment. He took a seat at the bar and ordered a glass of water.

"No coffee tonight?" The waitress teased.

He smiled. "Do I come here that much that you know I normally only drink coffee?"

She gave him a seductive grin. "Even if you didn't, I'd know what a man as handsome as you ordered to drink." She winked and sat down a glass of water in front of him. "Ready to order?"

"Don't you know what I'm going to order already?"

"That depends. Is it a steak and eggs night or a pancake night?"

"Hm… A nice, rare steak with perfectly fried eggs or pancakes drenched in butter and syrup? That's a tough one. Why not have it all?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I feel like indulging."

"All right, then." She called out the order to the cook and then turned back to him. She leaned over the bar, resting her forearms on it. "So what are you doing tonight?"

"Work. But my boss told me I couldn't come in tomorrow. He even made me leave early tonight. But I still have plenty to do."

"Early? Like ten minutes ago?"

He laughed, "Why do you know me so well, Kate?"

"Like I said, I pay attention to a handsome man." She winked and walked to check on her other customers.

She flirted with him every time she came back. And he flirted right back.

He asked her, "When do you get off work tonight?"

She looked at the clock. "Half hour." She grinned at him and bit her lip. "Would you like to walk me home, Soldier Hawthorne?"

He smiled. "Do you think you need an escort, Miss Black?"

She leaned over the bar. "I think I just might."

"Then I will wait for you, miss." He winked and made slower progress on his meal.

What was he doing really? Was this him? Was he just so lonely that this girl would do the trick? Annie snuck into his mind. He shook it off.

When she clocked out and passed over duty to the next server, Gale stood from his seat. He'd already paid for his meal and was just sitting and waiting. They stepped out the door together. The night was warm.

"Which way?" Gale asked.

Kate slipped her arm through his and steered him in the same direction as his apartment.

"I'm this way." He said.

"Are you really?" She laughed. "I've seen you coming out of the neighboring apartment building to mine. I was always too shy to say anything."

"You didn't have to be." He paused and then blurted, "I don't really have any friends."

"I don't either. I've lived here all my life and I don't have any friends. I kept to myself. I didn't even really do any of the training the others did."

"How old are you, Kate?"

"Twenty-three. I was twelve the year of the Quarter Quell. My mother was so relieved. I wouldn't have to go to the reaping that year."

"Yeah."

"It must have been so terrifying."

"It was. It was even more frightening when my brothers were old enough for the reaping."

"I'm sorry."

"I'm glad you never had to go through it."

They walked into the apartment building and up to the third floor. They stood outside for a while awkwardly.

"Would you like to come in?" She asked.

For a moment, he considered doing it. But then he shook his head. "I'm pretty tired. It's been a long week. A long several weeks actually."

"Well, okay, then. Now that you know where I live, feel free to drop by." She said hopefully.

"Okay."

Kate pressed herself up and kissed him. She dropped back down to her heels and hurried to open her door.

"Good night, Kate." He said as she went to close the door. He could see her face was bright red.

"Good night, Gale." She closed the door.

Gale deflated. He was such an idiot. He reached up his hand to knock and then decided against it. He turned and walked to his own building across the street. He let himself into his apartment.

He stood in the middle of the living room for a moment, trying to decide if he should work or just turn on the TV and zone out. But, before he knew what was happening, he picked up the phone and dialed Annie's number.

She picked it up. "Hello?"

"Hi, Annie. It's Gale."

"Yeah, hi. How are you?"

"I've been busy. I'm sorry. How are you?"

"I have good days and bad days."

"What was today?"

"Mostly good."

"Why only mostly?"

"I had a bit of a breakdown this afternoon. Finn came in from fishing and…He looked a lot like his father for a moment. And I couldn't stand it. I just lost it."

"Oh, Annie." He said.

"I got over it. But it was hard." She paused. "I almost called you. I don't know why."

"I wouldn't have minded. I was out, though."

"Out?"

"I got some supper at a diner down the road. Stayed to flirt with the waitress."

She laughed, "Glad to know you have some fun and you're not all work."

"I am mostly work." He sighed. "I haven't taken a day off since I got back. I've been working until late every night. My boss told me to take tomorrow off. But I brought work home with me anyway."

"Why? Are you that far behind?"

"Not at all. I just… I don't have any friends, Annie."

"You have me."

"You're not here."

"We're talking on the phone. We can do that every couple days. It won't be the same, but it will be enough, right? And you can maybe come home early some nights so we don't have to rush off."

He smiled into the phone. "I guess I should try to have more of a life outside of work. And starting with talking on the phone with you isn't such a bad place."

"Yeah."

"So how is Finn?"

"Counting down the days until his next school break. It's in a couple of weeks."

"That was me every year."

She laughed, "I'm sure. I always counted down the days until we went back to school."

He laughed. "I bet your son's lack of care of school drives you up the wall."

"It does. But it reminds me of his father."

"Finnick not much for school either?"

"Nope."

He sensed through the phone her shift in mood. He said softly, "Please don't go away, Annie." He heard her breathing steadily on the other end. "I'm still here."

In a few more seconds, she assured him, "I'm back."

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." She said, "I'll let you go."

"You sure you're all right?"

"I am."

"Will you tell Finn I say hello?"

"I will."

"Good night, Annie."

"Good night, Gale."

When they hung up, he looked at the phone for a long time. He hoped she was really okay.

He picked up the phone again and dialed another number.

"Hello?" Katniss's voice said from all the miles away. For a moment, they were back in the woods all those years ago.

"Hi, Katniss." He said.

"Ah, Gale. You're such a busy man, I hear."

"I have been. But I, uh, have a question."

"What's that?"

"It's about Annie."

"Ooh, Annie." She teased. "What about her?"

"How do I act with her? You know, to get her to like me."

He could hear her smile through the phone. "Just be you, Gale. What's not to like?"

"I don't know, you tell me." He said a little helplessly.

"You know how hard that choice was for me."

"Yeah, I know." He struggled a moment and then said, "Will it be just as hard for her?"

"With the way she was acting around you, I don't think so. It's been ten years, Gale. I think you can help her finally get over him and move on."

"I think she can help me." He took a breath. "I have to go. Talk to you later, Catnip."

She laughed. "Good-bye, Gale."


	9. Chapter 9

The phone was ringing as Gale unlocked the door. He ran to it and picked it up, afraid whoever it was would hang up before he could find out who it was. "Hello?"

"Hi, Gale." Annie's sweet voice said from the other end.

He smiled, "Annie, hi." He sat down on the couch and settled in for the conversation.

They'd been calling each other for the past several weeks. The conversations mostly centered around Finn and his activities. On occasion, they would delve into deeper topics like Katniss and sometimes Gale's foundering social life. They never talked about Finnick. When Gale brought him up, Annie would change the subject.

"So," He said, "How was today?"

"It wasn't great. But I got up and walked Finn to school this morning."

"Walked Finn to school?"

"He's skipped the last couple days. I told his principal I'd walk him to school myself to make sure he got there."

"Well, I suppose that's good."

"Yeah. He didn't like the idea. We got into a fight last night. I, um, locked myself in my room. I couldn't handle it. He would have been able to."

Gale didn't have to ask who the "he" was she mentioned. He said, "You think so?"

"He was always so much stronger than me, Gale."

"I don't think so. I think you just hold your strength in a different place."

"I had to make myself get out of bed this morning." She said softly.

"But you got up. And you walked your son to school."

"I did."

"How is Finn this evening?"

"He's fine. In his room doing homework."

"And you're doing what?"

"Sitting on the couch." She said softly.

"You sound like you're slipping." He said suddenly.

"What do you mean?"

"Are you okay?"

She paused a moment, "I don't know." She paused again. "Sometimes I miss him so much it hurts. Some days are harder because I remember something associated with him."

"So what is today?"

"Not today, tomorrow. It's his birthday." She let out a strangled sob. "He would have been thirty-five tomorrow."

"Annie?"

"I need to go, Gale." She said.

He didn't know what to say, but he felt he needed to say something to keep her on the line. "Does Finn know?"

"Yes. They honor all the past Victors on their birthdays. They mention it in the morning announcements at his school."

"You don't like that, do you?"

"I never have. Especially when I was added. Not that they made the Victors finish school. I just chose to. Sometimes it was what kept me sane."

"Then you had Finnick."

There was a pause. Then she said, "I need to go, Gale."

And before he could say anything else, the line clicked.

He sat back and kicked off his boots. He picked up the phone and almost called back, but he knew it wouldn't do much good. He put it back in its cradle and went about making supper.

The phone rang again as he was cleaning up his supper dishes. He ran to it, almost desperate. "Annie?"

"No, Katniss. Is something wrong?"

"I was talking with her earlier and she just hung up on me."

"Is there anything going on?"

"Tomorrow's Finnick's birthday."

"Oh."

"Yeah. We were talking and she said something about it. And then she hung up. Should I call her back?"

"Maybe she just needs to be alone."

"What about Finn?"

"What about him?"

"Should I worry about him if she…does something?"

"Do you think she's going to do something?"

"I don't know. Just sometimes I get this feeling that she would if she had the chance."

"I think she's stronger than that. Don't you?"

"Greif can make even the strongest person weak."

"You know from personal experience?"

"Watching you after Prim died." He said gently. "With all that Peeta went through after the Quell. When he was at the Capitol and you were in Thirteen. You were just a shell, Katniss. And it hurt me that I had to watch you and I couldn't do anything about it. It hurts me now that Annie is just as hurt and I'm not there to help her."

"Do you love her, Gale?"

"I don't know about that, but I do care. I care about Finn. He's a good kid. He deserves a chance at his childhood. He's been robbed of it."

"So you resent Annie?"

"No, that's not it. I pity her. I should have died in those tunnels that day. If I had, Finnick would still be here. And you would have had an easier choice to make."

"Don't you say that, Gale. If you had died…" She trailed off. There was silence on the other end of the line.

"You could have hated me in death and never had to forgive me for creating that bomb."

"If you had died, I never would have been able to live with myself. I may have blamed you for Prim, but I would have blamed myself for you. You're important to me, Gale. You always have been. You helped me keep my family alive for four years."

"Lot of good I did."

"You did."

"So why did you call?"

"I just wanted to see how you were doing. We haven't talked in a few days."

"Well, I'm fine."

"Maybe you should call Annie back."

"Maybe."

"Do it, Gale."

"Okay."

"Bye."

"Wait." He said urgently.

"What?"

"Do you hate me? I know you forgave me, but do you still hate me?"

"You saved me so many times. I don't know if I could ever hate you. I was hurt, sometimes I still am. But I love you, Gale. With all that we've been through together, I'll always love you."

"Katniss…Thank you. Good-bye."

When they were done with their conversation, he hung up. After looking at it for a while, Gale reached for the phone again. But it was ringing before he could start to dial. He answered it.

"Annie?" He asked expectantly.

A frightened voice said, "Gale?"

"Finn, what's going on?"

"It's my mom… After she got off the phone with you, she just wandered out the door. I thought she'd be gone for just a little while, but she's been gone for over an hour."

"Did you call the peacekeepers?"

"Yes. They said they'd send someone out to go looking, but they couldn't send out a full force because she hasn't been gone long enough."

"I don't know what to say, Finn."

"Will you stay on the phone with me until she comes back?"

"I will." He said, stretching out his legs on the couch. "Tell me about school. Why did you skip?"

"I just didn't feel like going. I'm no good."

"Your mom said you were good at math."

"Yeah, because it's easy. I don't understand anything else."

"You know what, Finn? I don't know much else either."

"Really?"

"Really. I was a wiz at math. And I could figure out shapes and things. I could graph lines in my head."

"Wow. I've seen the older kids struggling with that, even with a calculator."

Gale laughed, "My teachers used to get so frustrated with me because I never showed my work, I just wrote down the answers."

"But they were always right?"

"They were."

"It's the same with me. My math teacher accused me of cheating on our last test."

"When was the test?"

Finn paused. "Monday."

"Is that why you skipped school?"

"Kind of. I don't think she likes me. Her daughter was in the same games as my dad."

"Ah, I get it now. She doesn't like you because your dad survived and her daughter didn't."

"I guess. So she does everything she can to cut my grades. And she's not the only one. Most of the people in this District, in the village, they like me because of my parents. But there are a few others who don't. Or they feel sorry for me because of Mom."

"Because she's a little off?"

"That's the nice way of putting it, I guess."

"What do you mean?"

"When I was a baby, they tried to get me taken away. They said she was an unfit mother."

"Your mother is far from unfit."

"I was told that just after I was born, she walked out of the house without me. I was screaming my head off, but she left. Someone heard and came in to find me just lying on the floor. They found her later sitting out on the beach, staring off into nothing."

"Was that the only time?"

"They told me it was."

"And who is it that's told you this?"

"There's a neighbor, Mags's husband Dale. He's watched out for us. I think because Mags liked my father so much. She was his mentor. And he likes my mother, believes in her, I think."

"So he helped her keep you?"

"Yeah, he promised the authorities he'd keep his eye out for me. He used to come over a lot, but he's older and kind of forgetful nowadays."

"I'm sorry."

"He's as close to a grandfather as I have. None of my parents' family is around anymore."

"I know that's tough."

There was a pause on the line and then Finn said, "Mom?"

"Is she back?"

"Yeah. She's being supported by a peacekeeper."

"Good, then they know she's been found. Put her on and go to bed, okay?"

"Okay."

Gale heard the tap as the phone was sat on the counter. He heard muffled conversation. And then the phone was picked up again.

"Gale?" Annie's voice shook as she spoke.

"Annie, where were you?"

"On the beach. I'm sorry."

"Well, you need to apologize to Finn for what you've put him through."

"I'm a horrible mother, Gale."

"You're not. But I think you need some help. Is this because of Finnick?"

She let out a sob. "Yes." She whispered desperately, "I can't do this without him."

"Yes, you can. You've done well in ten years. You can do well for the rest of his life."

"I can't."

"You can." He took a breath and let it out. "Just don't walk out again, please."

"For you or for him?"

"I don't know—"

"I don't either. Just forget I said it. I'll talk to you later."

"Are you going to be all right?"

"I don't know."

"Just do your best. For him."

She hung up without another word.

Gale fell asleep on the couch worrying about his friend.


	10. Chapter 10

Gale slept fitfully that night. He got up in the early hours of the morning and moved to his bed, but that didn't do much to help. He still fretted about Annie and Finn.

As he got ready for work the next morning, he couldn't shake the feeling that something was going to go wrong that day. He called Annie's house as soon as he got to his office. Finn answered.

"Hey, buddy. How are you this morning?" He asked.

"Fine. Mom's not up yet. I think it's because today's Dad's birthday. She usually gets a bit worse on his birthday."

"You gonna be okay to get to school?"

"Yes."

"Go straight there. When you get out of school, call me at work."

"I don't have the number."

"Do you have a pen and paper to take it down?"

After a moment, he said, "Yeah, go ahead."

He gave him the work number and had the boy read it back. "You keep that close and call me. Promise?"

"Promise."

"Make sure you get to school. Don't be late. Today's important."

"I know."

"And tell your mom good-bye."

He mumbled, "Okay. Bye, Gale."

"Bye, Finn. Call me."

"Okay."

They hung up and Gale hurried off to his first meeting. He was distant in all his meetings, guzzling his coffee and thinking more about Annie's well-being than the current topic of more reconstruction to the Capitol. There were still, ten years later, some damage that had been left to do at a later date. And that later date was now, the government had decided.

Why this was an issue here was that they'd been working painstakingly to deactivate and remove some of the pods still guarding the place. They had all been shut off, but were still dangerous. The streets that held them were avoided at all costs.

The final pods had been discovered and taken down only weeks before. There were still some, even after all that had happened, who thought Snow could do no wrong. They still caused some trouble, writing threatening letters and making calls. So they were also putting together some guard teams to watch over the reconstruction.

"Hawthorne, is there something more important than this situation?" Commander Cabot asked from her seat at the head of the meeting. She'd been watching him all day and had finally grown tired of that distant, worried look on his face.

"No, ma'am." He said.

"Then do you have any suggestions?"

"I think everything seems in order."

"Good." She turned back to the man who had been speaking before she interrupted Gale's thoughts, "Proceed."

As he went on, Gale tried to pay attention, but there was still something that nagged him with worry about his friend so far away. How was she doing? Had she moved from her bed at all?

After the meeting, Cabot asked Gale to come to her office. She sat down behind her desk and motioned for him to have a seat in front of her. "You work too hard, Hawthorne."

"Too hard, ma'am?"

"When was the last time you took a day off? A complete day off?"

He thought about it a moment before he said, "Well, I suppose not since I was at the Capitol in February."

"Is there something worrying you?"

He looked at her for a moment before saying, "I just have some personal issues."

"Do you need to take a few days and deal with it? God knows you deserve it."

He breathed out a sigh, "Actually, that would be great."

Cabot smiled, "I'm giving you three days. And you should take your Sunday off as you are usually supposed to but haven't been. I don't expect to see you here before next Wednesday. And if you need extra time, call. You've hardly taken any time off since you came here and I was just a soldier at your side."

"Yes, ma'am."

"Dismissed, Hawthorne."

He stood. "Yes, ma'am." He walked out of the room and into his office and stared gathering his things. He would take some paperwork with him anyway to keep on the top of things.

The phone rang. Gale looked up at his clock as he picked it up. "Finn?" he asked. He could hear the worry in his own voice. What would the boy say?

"Hi."

"Hey, how was your day?"

"Good, I guess. Everyone kept watching me all day after they made the announcement about Dad's birthday. And my math teacher sent me into the hall for no reason."

"I'm sorry, buddy. Did your mom get up?"

"No. She's still in bed."

"Did you try talking with her?"

"Yeah, but she didn't even roll over to look at me."

He took a deep breath and said, "I'm going to come there for a few days."

He brightened, "Really?"

"Yeah, really. I've got to call and see about the next train, but I'll be there tomorrow sometime. I'll call when I know for sure."

"That's great. Maybe it will help."

"I hope so. I've been worried about both of you today. Are you sure you're okay?"

"I am."

"You promise?"

"I promise."

"Good. Put your mom on the phone."

"She won't talk, Gale."

"Just bring her the phone."

"Okay. Here she is."

"Annie?" Gale said softly. "Annie, it's Gale."

He got no response, but he could hear her breathing softly.

"I'm going to come see you for a few days, okay? Just stay strong."

She whispered, "It's so hard."

"I know. Just be strong for a few more hours and I'll be there. Okay?"

She didn't say anything.

Finn got back on the phone. "She's nodding."

"Good. I'm calling the train station right now and I'll let you know."

"Hurry, Gale." The boy sounded suddenly desperate.

"I will, buddy."

He called the train station.

"I need a ticket for the next train to District 4."

The man who answered the phone said, "We have one leaving in two hours."

"Fantastic. I'll take it. About how long will the trip be?"

"About eight hours, sir."

"So that would put me there at about one in the morning?"

"Yes, sir."

"Okay, then." He gave his information to the man on the other line and then hurried home. He called Finn to let him know what's going on. "I'll just have to find somewhere to stay the night. There's no need in me wandering around in the wee hours of the morning in a strange District."

"Are you good with directions?" the boy asked.

"I am."

"Then let me tell you how to get here from the train station. There's no need for you to stay somewhere for just a few hours."

"Okay." He laughed and then listened intently as Finn told him how to get from the train station to their home in the Victors Village. Gale repeated it back.

"I'll leave the porch light on so you know."

"Okay. Good. I'll see you in the morning, Finn."

Then he called Katniss's house. Peeta picked up.

"Hey, Peeta. Is Katniss home?"

"She's still out hunting."

"Okay. Well, I'm going to District 4 for a few days to see about Annie and Finn. Could you let her know?"

"Yeah, sure. Katniss told me about Finnick's birthday."

"Yeah. Finn called me this afternoon and told me Annie hasn't left her room all day."

"You take good care of her, Gale. She needs it." He paused, "I know that you lost out on Katniss, but… No, that came out wrong. Annie needs someone as steady as you. She's never been stable. But we watched her over the years, looked after her and Finn, because Finnick helped us. He helped Katniss. Annie's never been well since he died. So take care of her."

"I plan on it."

"I'll let Katniss know. And if you need anything, call us."

"I will. Thank you." He hesitated. He really needed to get to the station, but he had something else he wanted to say. "You've been good for Katniss."

"We've been good for each other, I think."

"Good. Now I really have to go. I'll talk to you later, I guess."

"Really?"

He chuckled, "You never know. In another life we could have been friends."

"You don't think we can be now?"

"You were always a better man than me, Peeta. Kinder to others." He admitted softly. "Good-bye." He hung up before Peeta could respond.

Gale quickly packed a small bag and then headed out the door to the station. He was able to board the train not much later. He settled in to the long ride. He hugged his bag to his chest and looked out the window.

As the train rumbled down the tracks, he thought about what Finn was doing. Was he all right? He wished he could talk to the boy again. Would he be able to sleep tonight?

With the rocking of the train, Gale's eyes started drooping. His lack of proper sleep the previous night was finally getting to him. He allowed himself to sleep for the rest of the journey.


	11. Chapter 11

It was dark when the train came to a stop and the conductor announced they had arrived at the District Four train station.

Gale stood and stretched. He walked into the station with the few other passengers and stood for a few moments, getting his bearings and waking up more fully. Then he walked out into the night. He turned left as Finn had instructed him. The main street was bright with street lights.

He counted out the number of blocks the boy had told him to travel. He looked up to see the name of the street: Oak Drive. He turned left and travelled down the darker street. They didn't seem to think street lights were as important here.

Near the end, he saw the new, brighter glow as he came upon the Victors Village. Here the street lights became regular again. He counted the number of houses and came upon the one house with a porch light as Finn had promised.

As Gale walked up the steps to the front door, it was thrown open and he was tackled around the middle by a brown-haired blur.

"You made it!" Finn exulted.

He patted the boy's back and said, "I did. You give really good directions, Finn."

"You must be tired. Come on, I got the guest room ready." He took the man's bag from his hands.

"You haven't gone to sleep, have you?" He asked as he followed him inside.

"No. I tried, but I was too anxious." They walked down the hall that led to the back of the house. There were three bedrooms. "The one on the left is Mom's room." He said, pointing.

Gale could make out her figure in the shadows.

"The one across is mine. And the third is the guest room." He stashed Gale's bag just inside the guest room.

Gale poked his head in the door across from Annie's and saw by the lamp on the desk a room painted a sky blue. There was a wave painted on three walls half-way up. On the other wall there was a mural of different sea creatures: several types of fish swimming in their different schools, an octopus, some star fish scattered here and there, shell fish of all kinds, sea horses, creatures Gale didn't even know.

"Peeta painted all that when I was a baby." Finn said when he noticed Gale's admiration of the painting.

"It's beautiful." Gale said in awe.

"My crib was on that wall."

He walked up and looked in a bottom corner. There was a man there, only a few inches tall. He was bronze-haired. He held a trident in his hand. Gale walked closer and stooped down. He had a cocky grin on his face and his sea-green eyes looked playful.

"It's my dad." Finn said, leaning down beside him.

"I thought so."

"Peeta told me that he had to fight with Mom to put him there. She didn't want it. There aren't any other pictures of him."

"None at all?"

"She put them all in the attic. She said when I was older and moved out, I could go up there and find them. They'd be mine. But she says she sees him enough in me."

He wrapped an arm around the boy's shoulders. "You do look a lot like him."

"I think it makes it worse for her when she sees it. She says some days I'm all him. But she never says his name. It's my name, too. Did you know that?"

"I thought it was."

"It's almost like she wishes she could forget him. If not for me, she could."

"Don't you think like that, Finn. If not for you…" He trailed off, not sure how to continue.

"You think she would have died?"

"I'd hate to think of a world without your mom."

"Me too. I just wish she had more good days."

"I know." Impulsively, he pulled Finn into a hug. "Get some sleep, kid. I'll go check on your mom and then go to sleep myself."

The boy hugged back, almost clinging to him.

Gale felt a sob leave the boy and suddenly he was shaking all over as he cried. His arms tightened around the man.

"Hey, it's okay. It's all right, buddy." He patted his back. "I'm here now and I'm going to do my best to help."

"I feel like she's never here." He whispered.

"She does some things with you."

"Sometimes." He sniffed and sat back. "He was great at the Capitol. She's never that good. I mean, she pulled herself together a few times to teach me to swim. But Dale taught me how to fish. He's done everything for me. And even when she's together, she's still not here. You know?"

He brushed some hair out of the boy's face. "I'm going to help do what I can from now on. Okay?"

He wiped at his nose and eyes. "Okay."

"Now, get some sleep. We'll talk more about this in the morning." He kissed the boy's forehead and then tucked him into bed.

Gale walked across the hall to Annie's room. He walked over to stand beside her bed. "Annie?" He asked softly.

There was no response or movement.

He sat down on the bed and reached brushed the hair off the side of her face.

She jumped at his touch and then rolled over onto her back and stared at him in the darkness. "You came?"

"I did. Are you sick?"

She nodded.

He placed his hand on her forehead. "You don't have a fever."

She simply stared at him.

"Are you dying?"

She shook her head. She whispered softly, "But I wish I was."

"Don't say that, Annie." He scolded. "Don't you ever say that."

"You don't know. I've been without him ten years. And even before that, I never had him. Not really. He was the Capitol's."

"He married you."

"It was only a couple months."

"You created a child together in those months."

Tears fell from her eyes and she rolled back over.

"Are you going to get out of bed in the morning?"

"I don't know."

"Will you be okay?" He felt his chest tightening in fear that she wouldn't. What would become of her son if she didn't? What would become of him?

"I don't know, Gale." She wailed, pressing her face into the pillow.

He reached out his hand and placed it on her back. "I'm here now. I'll be here for a couple of days."

"Okay."

"Finn made up the guest room for me."

"He shouldn't have. That should have been me. I should do so much more; I can't make myself do it. Without him, I've become nothing."

"Annie…"

"It's true, Gale. He was the only one who kept me going. Finn is just a reminder that he's gone." She let out a sob. "How awful is that? I hate my son, Gale. I resent his existence. If he hadn't been born, I could be with Finnick right now. I'd have no excuse. I've only been holding on for him because that was the right thing to do."

"Annie, stop this. Don't talk like that. Finn has no one else but you. He loves you. He needs you."

"He has you. You take him. He likes you. You've done well with him."

"Don't talk like that. Besides, I'm in a different district. He's all Four. He'd never do well in Two. And he does well with you."

"I don't care." She sat up and looked at him. "I can easily make the arrangements. You could take better care of him than me. And he's almost ten, so he knows how to take care of himself. It's not like a baby where you have to watch their every move—"

He grabbed her by her shoulders. "He's your son, damn it. He's your flesh. Your blood. Finnick's flesh and blood. I have no right to him. Now stop talking like this."

She wrenched herself out of his grasp. She rolled over.

"Annie?"

She said nothing.

"Are you going to be okay?"

Again she said nothing.

He leaned over her and brushed her hair from her face again.

She was staring at the wall unblinking.

"Annie, I like your son, but I like you too. I think he would do better to be with you, to stay with you. If you need me, I'm here. I'll be here for a few days. If you need to talk to me, I'll gladly listen."

She shifted her eyes to look at him a moment and then blinked and her eyes were once more focused on the wall.

"Please don't do this. Don't give up."

She pressed her face into the pillow and let out a shaky breath.

He gently rubbed her back. "I don't think Finnick would like to see you this way. He loved you to the depth of his soul. I know you miss him. But your son, the one you made with him, is in that room across the hall worried about your well-being. So get some sleep tonight and I hope tomorrow will be better. I'll be in the guest room. I'm staying until Tuesday." He kissed the back of her head and then walked out of Annie's room and into the guest room. He shut the door and turned on the light.

It was a simple room, painted a similar color to the waves in Finn's room with one wall the sky blue color. He changed and then stretched out on the bed. He didn't bother turning off the light. He didn't sleep the rest of the night either. He thought about Annie's words and the desperation in her voice as she begged him to take her son.

He thought of himself. Why was he so worried about himself when it came to Annie? Finn was more important. But he thought about his growing attachment to the woman. What would he do if he couldn't hear that sweet voice coming through the phone? It had started to become the only thing that really made life worth living for him.


	12. Chapter 12

There was a tap on his bedroom door. Gale threw himself out of the bed and ripped open the door only to find Finn standing on the other side. His heart fell a little, but he still pasted on a smile.

"Hey, buddy. What's up?" He asked, leaning against the door.

"I go fishing on Saturday mornings. Would you like to come with me?"

He glanced over at Annie's room. "I don't know. What about your mom?"

"She knows I go. We usually cook up whatever I catch." He looked down. "Well, when she has a good day we do."

"I…" he really didn't know what to say.

"She knows where to find me. I always go to the same place. I promised her I would."

"How long do you stay out?"

"Only a few hours. I usually get a good haul."

He looked at the doorway again. "What should I wear?"

"Something comfortable. Sometimes I just go out in my swimming shorts. Especially if the weather's nice. And it should be today."

He nodded. "Let me go check on your mom and then I'll see."

Finn's face brightened. "I'm sure she won't mind." He ran off into the kitchen on the other side of the house.

Gale stepped into the adjacent bedroom. He stood beside Annie's bed. She was still fast asleep, breathing steadily. He sat down on the edge of the bed and smoothed his hand over her back.

She stirred and opened her eyes slightly. "Hm?"

"Annie, it's Gale. You remember? I got here a few hours ago."

She nodded and rolled onto her back. She squinted open her eyes. "What's going on? Is something wrong?"

He rested his hand on the other side of her on the bed and leaned over her slightly. "No. Finn wants me to go fishing with him this morning."

One side of her mouth tilted up. "He's a good fisherman." Her eyes opened a bit more. "Are you going?"

He was struck by the brilliance of her eyes in the early morning light filtering through her windows. He swallowed and asked in a hoarse voice, "Do you mind?"

She shook her head.

"Will you be okay?"

She looked up at him a moment and then said, "I think so."

"Finn says he goes to the same spot."

"Yeah, I made him promise if he was going out alone, he'd go to the same place so I would know. On some of my good days, I go out and watch him. I tried dragging myself out there once on a bad day and I… Well, I didn't see Finn. And it hurt. I kind of lost it."

"Well, I'll be with him."

She smiled, "Do you know how to swim?"

"I know a little."

She chuckled. "Then I guess it's better that you have him out there rather than he has you."

He laughed and leaned down just a bit more. "Are you sure you'll be okay?"

She reached up and pushed hair out of his face. "I'll be here when you get back. And I will be well." She stroked his cheek lightly with the tips of her fingers. "I promise."

He stared down at her for a moment, letting her touch him. It was so tender, so kind. His eyes drooped and he almost leaned into her touch. Then he cleared his throat and stood. "Good. Maybe we'll get his normal haul."

"I hope so."

"See you in a few hours, Annie." He went back to his room and changed. He called a final good-bye to Annie and walked into the living room with Finn.

He held out a piece of bread smeared with a red jelly. "It's strawberry. Dale grows them and makes jelly out of them. I help." He held up his backpack. "I got some more food in case we get hungry."

"Great."

"How's Mom?"

"She's doing pretty good. Maybe you should go say good-bye."

He walked off to the back of the house. Gale chewed his bread and jelly. He looked around the living room that flowed into the dining room and then the kitchen.

"This was the house they gave Dad after he won. Mom's was farther from the beach." He walked over to the far side of the living room and pulled back the curtain that covered what Gale had thought was just a window. It was, in fact, a set of glass sliding doors.

Through them, Gale could see the beach and the waves gently lapping the shore. He walked over and stared out in wonder at the water glistening in the rising sun. He'd never seen anything so beautiful. "You see this every day?" he asked in a hushed voice.

Finn chuckled, "It's pretty, isn't it?"

"Gorgeous."

He pointed off to the left to a form on the beach. "That's my boat. It's not much, but it's mine. It used to be my dad's. Dale helped me fix it up."

He ruffled the boy's hair. "I bet it's great. Let's get going." He reached out to open the door, but Finn stopped him.

"We have to go out the front door." He closed the curtain again and walked toward the front door.

"Why do we have to take the front door?" Gale asked as he followed.

"Mom keeps the curtain closed over the doors. Sometimes looking at the sea makes it worse."

They finished their trip to the boat in silence. It was a small one, only about eight feet long. Finn put all his things in the boat and pulled out the oar. They pushed the boat out into the water and climbed in.

Finn rowed them out into the open water. He kept looking over his shoulder every few yards.

"What are you looking for?" Gale asked.

"I have to keep the house in view." He explained as he threw an anchor over the side of the boat. "Will you help me untangle this net?"

They worked together to untangle the net and put it off to one side. There were weights at the bottom and floaters at the top. One side was affixed to the side of the boat and Finn had a thin pole that was attached to the other end. Every so often, he would pull the string to him and haul the net up out of the water.

As Gale watched, he realized he did this when he felt a tug on the pole. He helped him haul it in every time. There were only a few small fish in it each time.

"These are too small." He said, throwing them back in. A few bigger ones he kept and threw them into a bucket filled with water he kept in the middle of the boat.

"So who taught you how to do this?"

"Dale. He let me ride out with the crew on his big fleet. When he retired, he came out with me alone and showed me how to fish like this. Sometimes he would take his boat with me and we'd stretch the net out between us and just drift for hours and see what we got."

"Do you think I could meet Dale while I'm here? He seems like a nice man."

"He is. And he said he wished he could meet you. I've told him about you."

"Have you really?"

"Yeah, well, you're so nice, Gale. And I know my mom likes you."

"Well, I like her too."

Finn opened his mouth to say something, but stopped abruptly when he was jerked back, almost losing a grip on his pole. "It's a big one!" he exclaimed.

Gale leapt forward and grabbed onto the pole to help haul in the net. The fish put up a good fight, but eventually the two were able to pull it in. It was a fish Gale had never seen and was a little longer than as his forearm, but twice as big around.

They untangled the fish from the net and it dropped onto the floor of the boat. It flopped around for a few minutes as the two stared at it in awe.

"Have you ever gotten one that big?" Gale asked in a hushed tone.

"Not alone. The biggest I get are about ten inches or so." He looked down at the fish and then flipped it into the bucket with the other smaller fish. "I never would have been able to wrestle that one on my own." He smiled up at Gale. "Thank you."

"It was nothing." He said with a wink.

"I think this is good enough. I want to show this one to Mom. Do you think she got out of bed? She told me she would."

"I hope so."

Finn pulled the anchor up and then picked up the oar.

"Let me row." Gale said and took the oar from him. He rowed them back to shore as the boy sat back.

"On my really good days, I bring extra to the market to sell or trade for other stuff we need."

Gale smiled, "Really? Katniss and I used to do that when we hunted. Except it was the black market, so it was kind of illegal."

The boy's eyes went wide.

He laughed. "Our peacekeepers turned a blind eye. At the time, they were pretty lax. And they were taking advantage of the market too."

Finn had a thoughtful look on his face.

Gale noticed it. "What are you thinking, kid?"

"Are you in love with Katniss?"

He hesitated for only an instant. "I was a long time ago."

"But she married Peeta. So you stopped loving her?"

"It was more than that." He looked over the water and pulled the oar onto his lap. "You know about the war? You know how it all ended?"

"I know Katniss was supposed to kill Snow, but killed Coin instead."

"Do you know what happened before that?"

He thought for a while before he said, "The bomb in the square in front of the mansion? The one that killed Primrose Everdeen?"

He nodded and continued rowing. "I helped design that bomb. Katniss knew. It hurt us both that something I made hurt someone we both cared about."

"So you stopped loving her then?"

"I don't think I ever stopped loving her. I don't think I ever will."

Finn watched the man for a while. He wanted to know something else, but wasn't sure of the answer he would get. But he asked it anyway, "Do you think you could love my mom?"

"She's still very much in love with your father. And lost to him so much of the time."

"I learned a word in school this week: persistent. That's how you should be with Mom. I know she could love you. I know she at least likes you. She smiles when she talks to you on the phone."

"I don't know about loving your mom, or if I ever can love her, but I do like her a lot. I like you a lot too. I hope we can keep being friends."

"I hope so too."

They pulled the boat in and gathered the things from the inside. Gale picked up the bucket and Finn got all his other supplies.

The boy ran forward and sang some happy fishing song about getting a monster fish that had gotten away from everyone else.

Gale laughed and followed, joining in on the chorus when he got to it the third time.

Finn pushed open the door, calling, "Mom, we got a whopper!"

Annie came over as they stepped into the house. She was smiling and looked the way she had at the Capitol all those months ago. Gale was caught by her eyes as she looked into the bucket. They were even more brilliant green in the light streaming in through the windows. She looked genuinely happy.

He was brought out of his trance when she pushed herself up on her toes and kissed his cheek.

She said, "Good job, boys. You want my help cleaning them?"

"I can get it." Finn reached down and picked up the bucket. He struggled a bit, but waved off any help Gale offered. "I like to work alone. It's calming."

"I know what you mean." Gale said as he and Annie watched him walk out of the house. "So what have you been doing this afternoon?"

"I did some cleaning." She walked into the kitchen. "And I started working on some rolls to go with tonight's meal. And an apple pie."

"I love apple pie." Gale said, sniffing the air hungrily. He had recognized the smell, but couldn't fully place it. It had been so long since he'd had homemade pie.

Annie laughed, "Good. So does Finn. So do I, for that matter. I guess we'll clean the pie pan."

"I guess." He lifted his hand to brush some hair off her face, but immediately dropped it.

"Thank you for going out with him this morning. All he has is Dale and he's not been well the last several months."

"I'm sorry. Finn speaks highly of him."

"Yeah, he's really been there for us. I invited him for supper."

"Good, I'm excited to meet him."

"I'm excited for you to meet him." She looked around the kitchen. "You want to help me finish up the rolls?"

"Sure."

They worked together side-by-side, making dough balls and placing them on a baking sheet to rise a second time. Gale reveled in spending this time with someone who was fast becoming his new best friend. It made him long for the days wondering the woods with Katniss. But at the same time, he wondered what could become of his time with Annie.

"This is nice." She said when they sat the rolls off to the side.

"It is."

"I'll make some tea. Let's sit in the living room."

Gale watched as Annie put the kettle of water on the stove. He leaned against the counter. She leaned beside him.

She said softly, "About what I said last night…"

"I'm honored that you'd trust me with your son's care, Annie. I just don't think you were in a good place to make that choice."

She nodded. "I do trust you." She leaned against him for a moment. "I trust you a lot more than I've let myself trust people in a while. You just have something about you."

"You do too." He said softly.

They stood there quietly for a while the kettle started whistling. Annie went about finishing the tea. She handed a cup to Gale and then walked into the living room. He followed her and was amazed when she walked over to the sliding doors and pulled the curtain to the side.

"Finn said you never open those." Gale said as he sat down on the couch opposite it.

"I hardly ever do. But I like it sometimes." Annie said. She turned and looked at him a moment and then walked over and sat down beside him. She sipped her tea quietly.

Gale put his arm over the back of the couch.

They talked quietly as they looked out at the beach. He told her about the fishing trip. She told him about her day.

Without knowing when it happened, Annie leaned into Gale's side and he wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

This was how Finn found them when he came in with the cleaned fish.


	13. Chapter 13

Finn leaned over the back of the couch. "Why are you touching my mom?"

The pair jumped apart.

Finn laughed happily. "I'm just kidding."

Gale reached over the back of the couch and pulled the boy over it and onto the ground. The pair wrestled as Annie fretted.

"Don't hurt him, Gale." She begged.

"Me hurt him? Your son's pretty strong."

Finn was holding Gale off pretty well. He batted the man's hands away and eventually wrapped his legs around Gale's and flipped him onto his back.

"I let you do that." Gale said with a laugh.

He laughed in the man's face. "Right."

"Guys, stop." Annie said, sounding distressed.

Both looked up at her. She was wringing her hands and biting her lip.

Finn got up and went to her. "I'm fine, Mom. See?"

She nodded and walked into the kitchen.

Gale gently squeezed Finn's shoulder and followed her into the kitchen. "Hey." He said soothingly.

She looked up when he walked in. "I'm fine." She said. She gave him a small smile. "I know you were only playing, but I went back to the Games."

He reached out a hand and placed it gently on her arm. "The Games are over, Annie. Everyone's safe. Finn is safe."

She nodded. "You're safe too."

"I'm not as important."

"Of course you are." She moved away from his touch and lifted the towel from the rolls. "These are perfect."

"Not the ones I rolled out. They're a bit irregular."

She turned her smile back to him, once again normal. "They're fine, Gale."

He reached up his hand and brushed some hair off her cheek. "You're beautiful when you smile. You look ten years younger."

"You mean I look old and ugly otherwise?" She teased.

"No, just older."

Finn cleared his throat. "Don't move too fast, Hawthorne. I'm watching you."

Gale looked at him for a moment and then turned back to Annie. He leaned in and pressed a kiss to her cheek.

She laughed. "You two." She turned away and put the rolls in the oven. "Where's that fish, Finn?" She turned and started rummaging through the cupboards. She produced flour and cornmeal and several different spices.

Finn came over happily carrying the fish he left to soak in water after cleaning it.

"Mom can fry better than anyone in the district." The boy boasted as his mother turned on a pan of oil to heat up and prepared the frying station.

"I wouldn't go that far." She said with a small laugh. "Finn, run next door and tell Dale that supper will be ready soon and he can come over whenever he's ready."

"You invited Dale?"

"Of course I did. Run along, now."

He did, literally, yelling for Dale as he went.

Gale laughed and sat down on the other side of the bar to watch Annie as she cooked.

"I've never had fried fish." He said as he watched her moving pieces of fish from flour to egg to corn meal and then to the hot oil.

"I hope you like it. We make fish every way you can think of."

"I used to make squirrel any way you can think of."

"Squirrel? But they're so cute."

He laughed. "So are rabbits, but people have to eat."

"You eat rabbit too?" She looked a little horrified.

"Yeah, I'm sorry."

She smiled, "Desperate times, I guess. Katniss told me a little."

He nodded. "She was a good hunting partner."

"I bet. She knows how to adapt to different people. But I know she's the best when she's with you or Peeta. I saw it at the Capitol."

"We still have our differences."

"I know. But you're still friends, or friends again. She's special."

"She was always something special to me. Before she was reaped for the Games, she was special to me. And to Peeta, I guess."

He folded his arms on the bar and watched her cook in silence.

Finn returned with a white-haired man. Gale had never seen someone so old. When he was growing up in Twelve, in the Seam, no one lived long. It was hard to believe he was still breathing.

The man turned his eyes, as blue as the sky, on Gale and gave him a calculated look. He held out his hand.

He slipped his hand into it and was met with a surprisingly strong grip. He smiled, "It's nice to finally meet you, sir. Finn and Annie have both spoken highly of you."

"And the same for you."

"Dale." Annie warned.

He removed his hand from Gale's and walked around the bar. "Now, girlie, don't go on about keeping him safe from me. I just want to protect you." He kissed her cheek.

"I appreciate it." She smiled at him and removed several pieces of fish from the oil.

"The boy was telling me about the whopper you two wrangled in today." The old man said, taking a seat beside Gale.

Finn took the other and talked about their morning fishing trip with hardly any breath. The adults indulged him. But Dale really wasn't paying much attention, he was examining Gale.

The younger man looked at him, removing his gaze from Annie's eyes as they danced with amusement at her son.

The old man leaned over and said softly, "I may be old, but I can still break your bones if you hurt those I care about."

Gale looked at him, blinking. "I'm sorry?"

Dale gave him a mysterious smile and then paid attention to Finn's tale.

The boy continued to command the attention of everyone throughout the meal. Gale paid attention, but just barely. His eyes kept wondering back to Annie. He would occasionally glance at Dale and see the man giving him a hard, warning look. He snapped his attention back to Finn.

Dale left after eating a small slice of apple pie.

Finn sat between Annie and Gale on the couch after they finished cleaning up the kitchen. Annie ruffled her son's hair and then pressed a kiss to the side of his head. He pulled himself out of her grasp, but crashed into Gale's side.

The man wrapped his arms around the boy and held him. "I got him, Annie. Do your worst."

Finn tried to wiggle his way out of Gale's grasp, but Gale only tightened his grip.

Annie laughed and took her son's face in her hands. "Give Mama a kiss, my dear, sweet baby boy." She planted kisses all over his face.

"Stop. Stop." He begged as he laughed.

She sat back, still laughing. "Okay, Gale, let him go. He has to go to bed anyway."

"But, Mom, it's the weekend."

"I know you didn't get much sleep last night. And you can barely keep your eyes open now. I'm going to bed soon myself and I want to make sure you're tucked away."

He looked like he was about to make a rude retort, but held his tongue. He nodded and stood, yawning and stretching. "I am tired."

"I'll be in to see you in a little bit."

He nodded. "Good night, Gale. Thank you for going fishing with me this morning."

"It was fun. Thank you for letting me go with you."

He walked out of the room.

"He was about to say something to me." Annie said softly.

"I noticed. He likes when you bother yourself enough to be concerned."

"'Concerned'?"

"When you pull yourself out off your depression to care about him getting enough sleep or being safe."

"I care all the time."

"Sometimes you don't show it enough. You lock yourself inside yourself and you just let that boy fend for himself."

"We were having such a good day, Gale. You're ruining it."

"You have some things you need to face. These days are so few."

"You don't know anything about me. You weren't at the Games and you didn't lose your spouse two months after you married him."

"No, I wasn't at the Games. And I didn't lose a spouse. But I lost a piece of myself when Katniss went in."

"She's still alive."

"Yeah, but she's married to someone else. Sometimes I think that's harder."

"Maybe it is, but you still don't get a say in how to run my life."

She got up and left the room.

Gale turned out the lights around the house and went to his room. It took him a while to get to sleep. He was thinking about Annie and the way her eyes had changed. They were a bright sea green when she was happy and focused. They sparkled when she was listening to her son. But as she had talked with him before walking off, they had turned darker. They looked like a gathering storm.

 

In her room, Annie climbed into bed without changing. She reached into a drawer in her bedside table and took out a small picture of Finnick. She curled up on her side and whispered to the picture, "Am I doing the right thing? Tell me, please. He's your son too. You left me alone without any guidance. Tell me what to do."

She stared at the picture for a long time. She knew it wouldn't answer her, but she still hoped. She still longed for his voice. "Finnick." She whispered. "I miss you so much."

After a few more minutes, she put the picture back and changed. She climbed into bed and stared at the ceiling until she finally drifted off to sleep.

 

Annie got up early the next morning after a dream about the Games. She knew she wouldn't be able to get back to sleep. The sun was up anyway. There was no use in staying in bed.

She got ready for her day and went into the kitchen.

Gale sat there, looking over a file with a steaming cup in front of him. He looked up when he noticed the movement out of the corner of his eye. He smiled.

She smiled back and sat down beside him. "Good morning."

"Good morning. I hope you don't mind, I made myself a cup of tea."

"No, I don't mind. Make yourself at home." She looked down at the file. "What's that?"

"Just some work I brought with me." He sat back and picked up his cup. "How are you this morning?"

"I'm fine." She looked at him a moment. "I talk to him. I know I'm already crazy by most people's standards, but that makes it worse, doesn't it?"

He examined her a moment. Her eyes were back to the bright sea green. "No. I used to talk to my dad all the time after he died. I caught my mom doing it a lot too." He reached out his hand and placed it on hers. He leaned closer. "I've never thought you were crazy, Annie. I just think your mind works differently than other people. And those that call you crazy don't have even a single clue as to what you've gone through."

She kept her eyes on his for a long time without a word. Then she leaned in and pressed her lips to his for a moment.

Gale was shocked at the pressure of her lips against his.

She saw the look on his face when she pulled away. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that."

"No, it was fine. I just wasn't expecting it."

She blushed. "I just couldn't think of a better way to thank you. No one else gets it."

He swallowed and nodded. He breathed out, "God, you're beautiful." He clamped his mouth shut. He stood hastily. "I'm going for a walk on the beach."

He left the room before Annie could stop him.

Finn walked into the room, yawning. "What's for breakfast?"

"I'll make some eggs." Annie said in a daze as she walked over to the refrigerator.

The boy looked around. "I thought I heard Gale."

"He went for a walk on the beach." She explained and went about making breakfast as Finn plopped himself down on the couch to doze some more.


	14. Chapter 14

Annie found Gale sitting with his feet in the surf several minutes later, staring out at the sun as it made its progress higher into the sky. She'd left Finn inside to gather the rest of the things for a picnic and meet them out there. She'd already packed the basket, but wanted a few minutes to speak with Gale alone first.

He looked at her as she sat down.

She sat a little apart from him. She smiled and looked out at the horizon. "I used to come here and sit and wait for him to come back from the Capitol every year."

"This exact spot?"

She looked around at the landmarks. She pointed a little farther down the beach to the left. "By that rock. That was the marker."

"And he always found you?"

She nodded. "And then we'd sneak away somewhere else." There was a wistful smile on her face, but the storm was in her eyes.

"Where?"

She shook her head. "Sorry." She turned her head. She had a teasing grin and her eyes were normal again. "My secret. I may tell Finn one day."

He reached up and hand and tucked her hair behind her ear. He smoothed his hand over her shoulder and down her back.

"Gale." She said, a small tremor in her voice.

"Annie." He leaned in and kissed her gently. He pulled back slightly.

She took a moment to consider and then leaned in and kissed him again, keeping her lips pressed to his a few seconds longer.

They sat looking at each other for a few seconds.

The spell was broken when they heard Finn singing happily in the distance. They parted and looked out at the ocean again. Both leaned back on their hands. Gale slid his hand over to Annie's and touched it with the tip of his fingers.

She looked at him out of the corner of her eyes. A small smile played on her lips. She lifted her hand and pressed on his shoulder, laughing.

He let out a small chuckle. "Way to break the moment, Annie." He teased.

"Finn started it." She slid her hand down his arm.

He turned his hand over, inviting her to slip hers into his.

She smiled and shook her head. She stood and walked into the water.

Gale watched her.

Finn came up and dropped a basket beside him and then ran out into the water with a yell and knocked his mother down, submerging her in the water.

She laughed and splashed water up at him.

He splashed her back, laughing louder with every bit of water that flew through the air.

Gale smiled as he watched them. He liked seeing Annie like this. She looked so much younger. He was lost in her laugh and her shining eyes when they started calling his name.

"Come in, Gale. The water's great." Finn said.

He waved them off. "No, I'm good."

The pair shared a look and then ran out of the water. They each grabbed an arm and pulled on him until he was on his feet. Then they tugged him into the water.

He gasped at the cold. "This isn't great. It's freezing."

Annie looked at him and said, "Well, Gale, there's only one way to fix that."

"What?"

She jumped on his back. "Just get in the water, Hawthorne." She said with a laugh.

He fell to his knees with a splash. He reached behind him and pulled her around and into the water.

She pulled him under and flipped around.

He sat up, sputtering and pushing his hair out of his face.

"Doesn't it feel great?" Annie asked, laughing and splashing water in her son's direction.

"Sure." The man said, still wiping water off his face.

Finn laughed. "What a wimp."

Gale narrowed his eyes at the boy. "Did you just call me a wimp?"

"Yeah, I did. Got a problem?" He challenged.

"No one calls me a wimp and gets away with it." He lunged out of the water after the boy.

Finn laughed even more and called, "Come and get me, Gale." He dove smoothly into the water and started paddling quickly out into open water.

Gale sloshed through the water until the water reached his neck. He stretched out his arms and started paddling clumsily. But he tired quickly. He treaded water and yelled, "You win this round, Finn. But I'll get you on land."

The boy turned in the water and laughed, "No, you won't."

"We'll see, kid." He swam back to where Annie was sitting in the water and watching them. He walked to her and sat down beside her.

They watched as Finn played in the water for a long time. Gale reveled in the quiet time with her. It was comfortable. Her hands floated through the water. Occasionally her fingers would brush against him. The boy's laughter drifted to them as he dove and flipped and turned in the water for nearly an hour.

"About the kiss…" Annie said after a while.

"Which one?" He asked. He gave her a teasing grin.

"All of them." She turned her head to look at him. Her eyes were on the brink of the storm again. "I don't want it to happen again."

His smile dropped. "It won't. Don't worry."

She smiled and nodded. "Thank you." She rested her head on his shoulder for a moment and then stood. "Finn, come get something to eat." She turned and went back up on the shore and started unpacking the basket.

Gale walked up behind her and helped her spread out a blanket and put out the food, mostly leftovers from the night before and a few apples thrown in since they all had, in fact, cleaned the pie plate.

Finn splashed up on the shore. Gale threw him an apple and he caught it without a second thought. He bit into it as he flopped down.

Annie reached over and pushed the wet hair from his face. "Did you have fun?"

"So much fun. You should have come out there, Mom."

"I couldn't leave Gale alone. He's our guest."

They all three sat and looked out to the water. The sun was high in the sky.

Finn kept casting glances at the adults. He'd watched them kissing as he walked up. Part of him hoped that they would soon admit to more than just friendship. He daydreamed about the three of them being a family and staying in District Four. He didn't even care that Gale's work was in a different district. A part of him imagined Gale do whatever he could to spend his life with him and his mom.

Annie stretched out on her back and closed her eyes. "Perfect time for a nap." She sighed.

Gale and Finn both agreed and stretched out on either side of her. It was quiet. The waves lapped the shore. Birds called to each other.

Gale turned his head to the side and watched Annie sleep for a while. She smiled. She rolled over and her arm came over his chest. He reached up to remove it. But after considering it, he left his hand resting on top of hers. His eyes drifted closed and he fell asleep.

* * *

Annie opened her eyes and saw Gale close to her. She felt his hand on top of hers on his chest. She sat up and slipped her hand from his. He woke up at the movement.

"Sorry." He said softly.

She shook her head and brushed the sand out of her hair. She looked over to see her son was still asleep. She leaned over and whispered, "Wake up, Finn."

He mumbled something and rolled onto his side.

Gale finished put the picnic things in the basket and said, "I can carry him back to the house."

"You don't need to do that. He can walk." Annie said as she reached down to shake him awake. "Finn. Come on, baby, wake up."

He rolled onto his back and stretched. He sat up and yawned. "I don't want to go back to the house yet."

"Well, if you want to stay out, just make sure you're back home before dark or I'll come looking."

He smiled, "Okay. Thanks."

Gale carried the basket back to the house with Annie strolling along beside him.

"I'm glad you came." She said as she let him into the house.

"Well, I've got one more day. My train back is Tuesday morning."

She nodded. "Tomorrow, we're going to take a trip to the market and pick out some of your favorite foods. Then Finn and I will make you a going away feast that you'll never forget."

He smiled, "I like the sound of that. But what about tonight?"

"There's a little stand in the market that makes fish tacos. They're pretty amazing. Finn and I love them."

"Fish tacos? What are those?"

"You've never had tacos?"

He smiled and shook his head. "I've never even heard of them."

She laughed. "Well, they take a piece of round flat bread called a tortilla and then put grilled fish, or breaded and fried similar to what I made last night, in it. And then they add a chunky, spicy tomato sauce called salsa and sometimes vegetables. And then they wrap it all up and you eat it."

"That sounds delicious."

"It is. Finn and I can put away quite a few of them."

He laughed. "So how long does this stand stay open?"

"Pretty late. They have a boat that catches fish especially for them. And they sell other stuff too. But that's what they do the best, according to Finn and me."

"Well, I'll have to try it."

"Good. I can run out and get us a mess of them and be back by the time Finn gets back. You can hang out and make yourself at home." She reached up a hand and ruffled his hair. "Maybe wash the sand out of your hair."

He laughed. "Yeah, maybe." He put his finger under her chin and tilted her head up. "Bright green. Good."

"What?"

"Your eyes. When they're bright green, you're doing well. When you start to go away, they look like a storm is coming."

She wrapped her hand around his wrist. "You noticed that in just two days with me?"

"Yeah." He leaned down and pressed a kiss to her forehead.

She looked up at him and smiled. "You're too kind."

He shook his head. "I'm just being human." He let go of her and walked around her. "I _will_ go and wash the sand out of my hair. And put on some clothes that aren't itchy with salt water."

She watched him as he walked down the hallway to his room. She flashed to a night with Finnick: the two of them sharing a shower; his hands caressing her body so gently; his kisses hot on her skin.

She swallowed and cleared her throat. "I'm going to head out, Gale. I'll be back in about a half hour."

He stepped out of the guest room carrying some clothes. He smiled. "I'll come looking if you're not back before dark."

She let out a small laugh. "Then I promise not to be gone long. And I will have supper with me when I return."

"You better." He teased as he stepped into the bathroom.

She waited until she heard the shower starting before she went to her room and changed quickly. She brushed out her tangled hair and slipped on some shoes. She rushed out the door. She was still thinking of that night with Finnick as she walked into town. Tears dripped from her face and she had to stop walking. She leaned against a wall and sunk to the ground.

_She'd been so much younger then. Barely more than a child according to her age, but she had lived a lifetime in the Games. And Finnick knew that. He had been there to comfort her so much that making love had seemed inevitable. But as many lovers as he had in the Capitol, he held off with Annie for so long._

_It wasn't until after the reaping the following year that it had finally happened. Her father was gone. He stayed gone a lot. Her mother had died when Annie was young and there had been no one else. He had become an alcoholic and it had only gotten worse when Annie had gone into the Games and then came home so unstable. He went out every night and drank to escape._

_She was in the shower. She often took showers because she could cry and cry and no one ever expected her to talk to them. They kept thinking that if she talked about it, it would make it better. But it only made it worse._

_And then Finnick was there with her and kissing her and holding her and telling her it would be all right. Then they were in her bedroom and he was so gentle and so sweet. He didn't pressure her; he just let her make the calls._

She wiped her face and took several long breaths. "You do always come back at the most inconvenient times." She said as she walked the rest of the way into the market. "Why do you do that?"

A few people saw her and heard her talking to herself. They gave her sympathetic looks. A few of them turned to each other and started whispering. She heard snatches of the conversations: they were talking about Gale.

"It's about time." She heard a woman say.

"Are you sure it's right for him to stay overnight with the boy in the house?" her companion said.

She walked up to the familiar food stand and sat the basket she'd been carrying with her on the counter.

"Hello, Annie." The kind owner of the stand asked. "How are you today?"

"I'm fine, Martin, thank you. Finn and I are entertaining a friend and we want him to try your fabulous tacos."

"Well, I'm happy to oblige. Grilled or fried?"

"Eight of each."

He nodded. "I'll get right on it."

They made small talk as he cooked. He asked about Finn and she asked about his family. He loaded up her basket and then threw an extra package on top.

"What's that?" Annie asked.

"They're called Elephant Ears. Fried tortillas with sugar sprinkled on top. A little treat for you. No extra charge."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. You're my favorite customer, Annie." He leaned in and said, "But don't tell anyone else." He winked.

Annie laughed and handed over the amount due. "Thank you, Martin. You're the best."

"I do what I can."

She laughed again as she picked up the basket and walked home thinking not about Finnick and her past, but about Gale and what the future could be.


	15. Chapter 15

Finn had dragged himself off to bed not long after supper. He had played hard out in the surf with a friend who had wondered out of his house not long after the adults left. Annie walked back into the living room with Gale after checking her son.

"Fast asleep." She said, sitting down on the other end of the couch. She stretched her arm out along the back and put her hand on top of his.

He looked at her hand for a moment and then lifted his fingers to twine with hers.

She stared at him a few moments and then removed her hand.

His heart plummeted to the pit of his stomach.

She said simply. "I like our friendship as it is."

He nodded and turned, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I don't want to upset you, Gale."

"And I don't want to do anything you don't want to do, Annie." He turned back to her. "I like our friendship too." He paused and looked out the large window. The moon was shining on the water. "But I lost Katniss by never being honest with her until it was too late."

She moved closer and rested her head on his shoulder. "Then be honest with me."

He was quiet for a while, contemplating how to say what he wanted to say. He slipped his hand into hers on her lap. "I think you're beautiful, Annie. You're beautiful when you're happy. You're tragically beautiful when you go away. But I prefer the happy Annie."

"I'm never happy, Gale. I'm content sometimes, but I'm never really happy."

"You were today when you were playing with Finn. You laughed. I never knew you had such a musical laugh."

She threaded her fingers with his. "I never stay happy long." She turned her head and pressed her eyes into his shoulder. "He's always there, Gale. He never goes away. But it's only a ghost. His memory. It filters into everything. He's everywhere. I can't go a day without him sneaking in somewhere." She reached her free arm up and curled it around his neck. Her grip on his hand tightened. "I just wish it could all go away."

His hand came up and rubbed her arm. "I'm sorry." He said softly. "I don't know what else to say."

She looked up at him. "Promise me something."

"Anything for you."

"If something happens, will you take care of Finn?"

"This again?" He brushed a finger down her cheek. "The storm is back."

"Just promise me, Gale."

"As long as you promise me you'll make an effort. I don't want to get another worried call from Finn because you wandered away without a word."

A tear slipped out of her eye. "I promise."

"Good." He kissed her softly. "Now, it's kind of late and I don't know about you, but I'm exhausted."

She nodded and stood. She wandered to her room without another word.

Gale gave it a few minutes before he walked to the back of the house. He knocked on Annie's slightly ajar door. "Are you okay, Annie?"

She walked over and opened the door the rest of the way. She had a picture frame clutched to her chest. "I don't know if I'll ever be okay, Gale. But I appreciate your concern."

"You'll get up tomorrow, won't you? It's my last day. You promised me a feast I'd never forget."

She smiled and the storm clouds moved slightly. "Yes. I keep my promises."

He hesitated a moment and then leaned in and kissed her forehead. "Good night, Annie."

"Good night, Gale."

* * *

Gale was awakened the next morning by Annie singing in the kitchen. He heard Finn's voice join in on occasion, but it was mostly her. He lied there for a while just listening. Her singing was as beautiful as her laughing.

He dressed and wandered into the front of the house.

Annie had her hands in some dough and flour up to her elbows. She looked up and smiled at him, but continued her song.

He moved around the kitchen and made himself a cup of tea and took some toast smeared with jelly from Finn. He winked, "Thanks, kid." He sat down and watched his friend set aside the dough.

"Good morning, Gale." She said, coming over with her own cup of tea and sitting beside him at the table. "Did you sleep well?"

"I did." He smiled and scooted his chair closer to hers. "Did you?"

"Mm-hm. No nightmares. It's the first time in a while."

"Good."

She leaned in and whispered, "I had a dream about you."

He smiled. Flirty Annie was amusing. "What did you dream about me?"

"I can't tell you."

"Why not?"

She smiled and shifted her eyes momentarily toward her son. "Just can't. But it was nice." She kissed his cheek and then stood.

"Hey." Gale grabbed her around the waist and pulled her back. "You're like a whole different person this morning."

"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?"

"I don't know yet. But I think I like it."

She smiled and kissed the top of his head.

He let her go and watched her move around the kitchen putting away all the ingredients she'd gathered for the dough.

She sent Finn off to school a few minutes later. He was very reluctant to go. She pulled him into a hug. "We'll go to the market when you get home, okay."

He sighed, "Okay." He got his books and sauntered out the door.

He looked at her once they were alone and asked in a hushed voice, "So that dream?"

She laughed and said, "You were swimming. You didn't have a shirt on. You were walking toward me out of the water, I was on the shore. And water was dripping off you in the morning light. Before you got very far in, I ran out to you and pushed you back under. I was kissing you. And then I woke up."

He smiled at her. "That's a beautiful dream." He gave her a roguish grin, "My dream about you was a little less tame."

"Oh?"

"We were doing a lot more than kissing."

She blushed and looked away. After a moment, she stood from the table and removed the breakfast dishes.

Gale was embarrassed he's given that away. It had been a lovely dream. Waking up from it had been difficult for him. But the reality was just as good. He walked over to Annie and slipped his hand into hers. He squeezed it gently and then let go.

Gale and Annie went for a walk on the beach when the kitchen was clean again. They occasionally held hands, but only for a moment before she removed her hand from his, even if she had initiated the touch.

They went back in the house and ate a late lunch. Annie put the bread she had been working on in the morning in the oven to bake.

"That should be done about the time Finn comes home from school." She said, sitting on the couch with a fresh cup of tea.

Gale watched her for a while and then looked out the large glass doors. "I can't believe people grow up with this view."

"It's nice isn't it? I missed it so much when we were in Thirteen."

"Yeah, I bet."

She moved over to his side and leaned against his shoulder. "I'm going to miss you." She said softly.

"And I'll miss you too, Annie."

Finn came into the house not long after. Annie pulled the bread out of the oven and sat it to cool.

"To the market!" She announced, picking up her basket from beside the door.

Finn grabbed the cloth bags from a hook in the pantry and then bounded out the door. Gale and Annie walked out at a more sedate pace. He was ahead of them for most of the trip.

Annie smiled and watcher her son.

He turned around and said, "Hurry up, you two."

She looked over to Gale as the boy turned back around. She said softly, "Follow my lead."

He nodded.

She rushed forward and he went with her. She slipped her arm through Finn's and Gale did the same. They lifted him off the ground and swung him between them as the boy squealed.

"Run." Annie said to Gale and they bother charged forward for several feet.

They put him down near the opening of the market.

It was bustling as well as any day at the Hob that Gale remembered. He looked on for several long minutes.

Annie and Finn smiled beside him. She tilted her head. "Come on. We have a lot to get."

They wondered through the market, talking with several different people. Gale met so many that he lost track. He apologized that he probably wouldn't remember many names. They all said it was no problem.

There were several clusters that stared and whispered behind their hands to each other as the three passed, but Annie smiled at them. They introduced themselves to Gale. Once they walked off, the groups collapsed again and continued their whispers.

"So what would you like me to make?" Annie asked, nudging Gale with her shoulder.

He smiled down at her. "What were you planning to make?"

"I make this really great clam stew. I can send Finn to find some clams if we can't find any here. But I know a guy." She winked.

"That sounds great." He smiled and put his hand on her lower back as they walked through a thick group.

She stepped away from him as soon as they were clear. She smiled and then walked to the next stand. "Martin." She said, turning her brilliant smile on the tan man. She turned. "This is my friend Gale. Gale, this is Martin."

"Ah, this is the friend you were telling me about."

She told Gale, "He makes the tacos."

Gale held out his hand. "They were amazing, Martin. Thank you."

"Just doing my job. Can I offer you anything?"

Annie leaned forward. "Did you get any clams this morning?"

"I did. And no one ever asks for them." He reached under the counter and pulled out a bowl. There were only a few in it. "My boat doesn't try to get them, really. So no one really knows to ask here."

"But you have the best rates." Annie said with a small laugh.

"Of course I do. You want them all?"

"Yes, please."

Martin wrapped them up and placed them in her basket. He waved Annie close and said softly, "He's a catch."

She smiled, "He's just a friend."

"Sure. You haven't smiled this much in a while. And I would know. I've know you all your life." He smiled and passed over her change.

She shrugged and turned away. "I just need to get some potatoes and we can head back home."

Gale stayed close to Annie. Finn ran forward several times to talk with friends he saw. It made Gale smile to see him acting like a child. When they were finished with their shopping, they had to drag him away.

As they were walking back to the house, Annie slipped her hand into Gale's.

"I'm not ready for you to leave, Gale." She said desperately.

He looked down at her and squeezed her hand. "You'll be fine. I know you will."

"But what if I'm not?"

He stopped her. "We don't need to worry about this. I'm here for the rest of the day and all night."

"There's not much left to the rest of the day." She said softly, looking down.

He put a finger under her chin and lifted her eyes back to him. "We'll make the best of it. Let's go make that stew."

They all gathered together in the kitchen. Finn floated around with Annie. The two worked in tandem very well.

"I make this a lot." She said as she handed Gale an onion to chop.

"I'm excited." Gale said as he got to work.

He sat back and did a lot of watching mother and son work.

Before too long, Annie ladled three bowls and passed them around the table. They sat together and ate. They teased and talked about trivial matters. Gale's gaze kept drifting to Annie's eyes. The storm clouds rolled in and then away again every so often as she listened to her son.

He impulsively reached out and placed his hand over hers.

She looked at him and smiled.

He squeezed her hand and then stood with his empty bowl. They all worked together once again to clean up the kitchen.

Annie looked up at the clock. "Finn, do you have any homework?"

Finn sighed, "Yeah, I have a book we started reading in English. I have to read two chapters tonight."

"Then you better get to it."

"But Gale leaves in the morning."

"I know he does. But homework is more important."

He looked over to the man to beg his help. "Sorry, buddy, I can't dig you out of this one. You need to do your homework."

"You're no help." He said and left the room.

Annie called after him, "I'll be checking on you, so don't even think of putting it off." She sat down on the couch.

Gale sat on the other end and pulled her feet onto his lap.

She smiled. "Thank you for supporting me. It's nice."

"I bet." He said softly. He looked into her eyes. "Storm's back."

"You've been watching me all night. Was it ever completely gone?"

He shook his head. "It rolled in and then back out again a few times."

"I kept thinking of his father." She said softly. "As he gets older, I'm reminded of him more and more."

"I know. I saw that when I first saw him in the Capitol last February. He's Finnick all over."

She swallowed and lifted her feet from his lap, pulling her knees to her chest and wrapping her arms around her legs. "Why, Gale?"

"Why what?"

She shook her head and looked up. "Why everything?" She looked into his eyes. "Why did I fall in love with him in the first place?"

"You tell me."

She shrugged. "I don't even remember for sure. Sometimes it's all jumbled together." She was quiet for so long, Gale thought she was done talking for the night. She finally said, "The Games."

"Hm?"

"The Games. I had thought he was handsome for years, since his own Games. Then he was my mentor and he was so kind to me. He promised me he'd get me the best gifts to keep me going. And he did. But then I lost it and I knew there was no way I was getting out of there." She squeezed her eyes shut and tears slipped out. It took her a long time before she was able to speak again. "I forgot everything and went on instinct, hoping for death. I didn't even know what was happening until long after I was taken out of there. The only thing that I knew was real were his arms holding me. I didn't let him go." She opened her eyes and blinked at Gale several times. "He was the only thing that was ever real to me for so many years. And then he was gone. So I don't know what's real anymore. I haven't for years."

"Your son's real. Dale is real." He smiled. "Martin at the taco stand is real."

She snorted.

"I'm real. I'm here for you. We're all here for you. You know that, right?"

"You're not here. You're in District Two."

"I'll only be a phone call away."

She took a breath and nodded.

They sat in silence for the rest of the night. Gale moved closer and wrapped his arms around her. They sat that way for a long time.

Gale stood. "I need to get my things together and get to bed. I have an early train." He looked down at her. "You're coming with me to the station, right?"

"Sure, if you want me to."

"I do."

She stood. "I need to get Finn to bed."

They stood face-to-face for several moments. Both seemed to be contemplating something.

Annie pushed herself up on her toes at the same time Gale leaned down. Their lips met. His arms came around her back and hers wrapped around his neck. The kiss deepened and went on and on.

Annie stopped it, but kept her arms around his neck.

Gale continued to hold her close as they looked into each other's eyes. He pressed a short kiss to her lips and then gently let her go.

"Gale…" She began, but didn't know where to go with the conversation next.

He smiled and kissed her forehead. "I'll see you in the morning."

She nodded. "Bright and early."

The pair stood awkwardly for a few moments. Then Gale turned and walked out of the room.

Annie was dazed for a few moments before leaving the room herself.


	16. Chapter 16

Annie lay in her bed for a long time that morning. She woke up to a dream reliving the kiss from the night before. But the difference was that when she pulled away this time, it was Finnick. And then he disappeared from her arms and she was alone.

She heard Gale stirring in the next room. Then she heard his feet padding softly down the hall. She got up when she heard the bathroom door click shut. She wandered across the hall.

Finn was still asleep. His face was relaxed; he looked like the little boy he was supposed to be. She stood and watched him sleep for a while.

She felt Gale behind her. She said softly, "He's so peaceful."

"He is." The man's voice said close behind her.

"I put too much on him." She turned and leaned her back against the door frame and looked up at him. "Don't I? He's not even ten and he acts like an adult."

"Not always. Yesterday he ran around with his friends. The day before, he splashed around in the water."

"But we're not always like that. You've seen me worse."

"I have. But you're better than that." He tucked a piece of hair behind her ear and rested his hand on her cheek.

She looked up into his eyes. "You're the rock that anchors me to the shore."

He looked down at her. "I'm not that important."

"But you are, Gale." Her hands slid up his chest and rested on his shoulders. "Your eyes." She smiled. "You said mine change, but yours don't. From the first time I saw you in the Capitol all those months ago until right now at this moment, you eyes are the same, steady gray. Like a rock. You're _my_ rock."

He smiled and rubbed his thumb across her cheek. "Well, I'm honored." He leaned down and kissed her forehead.

She turned her head up and caught his lips with her own. It was only for a second, but it sent heat all through Gale unlike the kiss they'd shared the night before. That was just simply for comfort. This was something more.

Gale stepped back, slightly stunned. He blinked. He felt the need to say something, but he didn't know what.

Annie's eyes were confused. "I did something wrong."

He shook his head and smiled. He pulled her out into the hallway. He leaned back against the wall and kissed her again. His hand supported her back as he pulled her close. His fingers ran through her hair.

She was up on her toes, trying to get as close to him as possible. Her hands were in his hair, pulling his face to hers. Her hands slid down to his face and she pushed him away gently.

She swallowed. "What am I doing?" She stepped out of his grasp and backed up against the opposite wall. She looked around, confused and distressed.

He reached out for her. "Annie?"

She gently pushed his hand away and escaped into her room and closed the door behind her.

Gale tapped on her door. "I'm sorry." He said softly.

The door remained shut.

"You _will_ come to the station with me, won't you? You said you would. I'd hate to leave it like this."

After a few more silent moments, a tearful Annie opened the door. "If you still want me to go, I will."

"I do. I have to be there in an hour."

"Would you like me to make you some breakfast?"

"No, I can find something." He reached up to wipe her face, but she stepped out of his reach. He dropped his hand. "I hate storms." He said simply and then turned and walked away.

Annie rested her head against the door frame for a moment. She walked across the hall and sat down on Finn's bed. She smoothed his hair from his forehead.

He squinted his eyes open. "Hm?'

"Finn, do you want to go to the train station before school and see Gale off?"

He nodded.

"Then you should get up. We have to leave in an hour."

"Okay." He croaked. "Five more minutes?"

"I'll jump in the shower and give you another ten minutes, okay?"

He nodded and rolled over away from her.

She leaned over and kissed him. She was still reeling from the kiss with Gale and feeling so guilty. But she had no real need to be. Finnick had been gone for ten years now. More than ten years.

Annie let the water wash over her for a while. She whispered, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

She thought she heard the bathroom door open and she looked around, expecting Finnick to join her. But he wasn't there. He never was. And he never would be again.

She slammed her hand against the wall and let out a wail. She sunk to the bottom of the tub and sobbed. She pounded her fist on the wall over and over. She screamed.

There was a frantic knock at the door and Gale and Finn asked at the same time, "Are you okay?"

She looked around herself wildly for a moment. She blinked several times. She said helplessly, "I'm never okay."

"Do you need anything, Annie?" Gale asked.

"I need time to go backward." She turned off the water and stepped out, grabbing a towel in the process. "I'll be out in a minute." She stepped to the sink and wiped at the mirror. "I look awful."

Outside Gale and Finn watched the door desperately, waiting for Annie to emerge.

"I know you're out there." Her voice said from the inside.

"We're not going anywhere, Mom." Finn said.

They were met with silence. The two continued to wait by the door until she finally opened it. Her eyes were red. He was holding one hand close to her body.

"Finn, get your shower." She said, walking past him into the front of the house.

"Are you okay, Mom?"

"I'm fine. Go on and take a shower. I'll make breakfast." She started banging around in the kitchen.

Gale walked in. "Annie—"

"If you ask me one more time if I'm okay, I'll stay behind." She snapped.

"All right." He sat down at the bar and watched as she quickly scrambled up some eggs and threw fresh bread slices into the toaster.

The meal passed in a tense silence. Both Gale and Finn watched Annie intently.

She slammed her fork down on the table. "I'm fine, damn it!" She stood up and threw her dishes into the sink. She looked up at the clock. "Gale, we should probably head to the station."

He nodded. "Finn will you run to the guest room and get my bag?"

The boy nodded and left the room.

"You don't have to come if you don't feel up to it."

She looked at him. "Gale…" She clenched her jaw and squeezed her eyes shut. "I can't."

"You can't what?" He asked gently.

"We're getting too close. What happened this morning, last night…It was a mistake. I'm just lonely."

Gale's heart clenched. "You feel like you're cheating on him?"

She kept her eyes cast down. She opened her mouth, but no words came out. She looked up again. "You said you wanted to be honest with me. So I'll be honest with you. I hurt every day. I look at Finn and I see him. I look at the ocean and I see him. I close my eyes… He's everywhere. But I can't stand to leave or give him up completely because if I do, the hole in life will be so much bigger." She wiped at her face in vain. More tears fell. "And if I get close to you, I feel like I'll forget what we had, as little as it was. And what we had was great when we had it."

He walked up to her and placed his hands gently on the side of her face. "I won't kiss you again. And I won't push you to do anything you don't want to do or don't feel comfortable doing. I want to be your friend. I _need_ to be your friend. I don't have any. Honesty." He said softly. He rested his forehead against hers. He whispered, "I care about you. I care about Finn. I don't want to leave with you like this."

She rested her hands on his waist. "I'll be fine."

"I hope so."

They stood like that for several moments in silence.

Finn spoke, breaking them out of the moment. "Gale, you're going to miss your train."

Gale lifted his head and looked at him. "And you're going to be late for school if we don't get going." He looked back to his friend. He wiped the tears from her face. "You okay?"

She nodded.

He kissed her forehead and then stepped away from her.

At the station, Finn threw his arms around Gale and hugged him tightly.

"I had fun, buddy." He said, looking down at the boy.

"Me too. Will you come back and visit us again?"

"I'll see what I can do." He smiled and ruffled the boy's hair. He stepped over to Annie. He brushed a hand through her hair. "I'll call as soon as I get home."

She nodded.

"You sure you're okay?"

"I will be. I think."

He leaned down and kissed her cheek. He whispered, "You said I was your rock. Remember that. I'm here if you need me."

She looked up at him desperately. "I feel like I'm drifting out into the water, Gale. I'm drifting away and there's no one to help me. You're too far out on the shore."

He gripped her shoulders. "Annie, listen to me. You're better than this. You can do this. Do it for Finn. Do it for me."

She nodded. "You better get on the train."

He kissed her forehead and then turned to Finn one last time. "Do your homework, kiddo." He said, ruffling his hair.

He shrugged the man off.

"I'm serious. And don't give your mom a hard time."

"I won't."

He looked at each of them one last time and then stepped onto the train. He found his seat and looked out the window. The pair was still on the platform. He waved.

Both waved back. Finn was smiling. Annie's look was still frightened.

As the train pulled out, he watched them get smaller. He hoped Annie would be okay.

* * *

Annie and Finn watched until the train was in the distance.

She then turned and headed off in another direction. "Come on, son. You'll be late for school."

He ambled after her. They were silent for a while and then he said, "I saw you kissing Gale on the beach. And last night, too."

She wasn't sure what to say for a moment. She looked over at him. She was nervous. "Did you now?"

He nodded. "Are you going to marry him?"

"We're just friends."

"You don't kiss any of your other friends."

"What happened between me and Gale was a mistake."

"But, Mom, I know you like him."

She snapped, "That's enough, Finnick!"

He stopped walking for a moment. She never called him that. It hurt her too much. She must be really upset. He continued on with her in silence.

She stopped outside the school. Several of his classmates still milled about outside. She stared off. "I'll see you at home later." She said softly. She turned and wandered off without another word.

Finn looked after her for a few moments. The bell rang and he hurried inside with the rest of the students.

Annie wondered the streets for a while. She looked around every corner, thinking that he might be there. Then she stopped herself. "He's not there." She said. "He's not anywhere."

A few heads turned at her voice. They shook their heads at her in pity.

She turned and walked toward the beach. She walked to the rock that marked the point where she waited for Finnick. "Come and find me." She said. "I'll be waiting."

She leaned against the rock and looked out to the water. The sun rose higher in the sky and then started its descent to the west. It was dark when she stood and walked back to the house.

"Mom?" Finn asked when she walked into the living room. "Have you eaten since breakfast?"

Annie looked at him a moment. She blinked a few times and looked away. "No, I've been out on the beach."

"All day?"

"Not all day." She said softly. "Has Gale called?"

"No. Do you want me to make you something to eat?"

"No, baby, I'm fine."

"Are you really?"

She looked at him again. She smiled, "I'm okay, Finn. Really, I am. I'll make something myself. Have you done your homework?"

"Yeah. I didn't have much. Some problems in math and reading in the book." He waved the book he held in his hand. "Just have to finish this chapter."

She walked over and leaned over the couch. She kissed the top of his head. "I love you, Finn."

"Love you, too, Mom."

As she was finishing making a sandwich, the phone rang. She let Finn answer it, knowing it was Gale. She let the two talk for a while as she ate. She walked over and took the phone from her son when he held it up for her. He wandered off to his room without a word.

"Hey, Annie. How was today?"

"Not good." Her voice was so low, she wasn't sure he could hear her. She cleared her throat and said, "I, um, kind of snapped and went away for a while."

"What happened?"

"After everything this morning… Finn said he saw when we kissed on the beach and last night."

"Not this morning?"

"No."

"I suppose that's a good thing."

"Maybe."

"Annie?"

"Gale, he…he asked if we were going to get married. He kept on asking and I broke. I called him by his full name and it…" She paused. He could hear her breathing on the line. She said, "I wondered through the streets looking for him. Then I remembered he wouldn't be lurking around a corner. So I went to our spot on the beach and told him to come find me."

"And you sat there the rest of the day?"

"Yeah." She said softly. "I can't do this, Gale. I just want to go to bed and never wake up. I want to be with him."

"You need to be with your son, Annie."

"I know." She said softly. "I know."

"You can call me any time, you know. I'll talk you through this."

"Okay." Her voice was so small; it tore at Gale's heart.

"Remember your promise to me."

"You promised me too."

"Well, you know what, my friend, our promises trump each other."

"So?"

"So, if you keep your promise to me, I don't have to keep mine to you. But for me to keep my promise, you have to break yours."

"I keep my promises, Gale." She looked up. "I left the curtain open."

"Go close it." He said gently.

"I did." She paused. "Do you really mean it about calling you any time?"

"Yes. Day or night, I don't care."

"But you'll be at work."

"I'm in my office a lot. And if not, leave a message and I'll get back to you as quickly as possible. Okay?"

"Okay. Um, I'll let you go so that you can get to bed soon. I know you have to get to work early."

"Are you okay? Will you be okay?"

"Yes."

"Then good night. And remember that you can call me if you need to."

"I will." She said softly.

"By the way, I really liked the kiss. It was nice. I know that we're just friends and we're not going to do it anymore, but I liked it."

"It meant nothing." She said and then hung up without another word.

Annie stood and went to Finn's room. He was still reading. "I'm going to bed." She said softly. "See you in the morning."

"Good night, Mom."

She wandered into her room. She took out her picture of Finnick and clutched it to her chest. She cried herself to sleep.

* * *

Gale tossed and turned all night, worrying about Annie. He had several dreams where he was told different scenarios of her death. Every time he was haunted by the look on Finn's face. He finally got out of bed more than an hour before he usually did, giving up on sleep. It would be a long day. He resisted calling Annie. He trusted she'd keep her promise.

At least, he hoped she would.


	17. Chapter 17

Over the next several weeks, Annie hung on, but barely. Every call with Gale, she talked about how weak she was and how she didn't think she could make it.

"I believe in you, Annie." He always said. "And I trust you to keep your promise."

"But I don't believe in myself." She said softly.

"You can do it."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

The weeks went on and things got a little better. Her spirits lifted and Gale was even able to make her laugh a few times.

"There that is, I missed it." He said the first time it happened.

"Well, I miss you." She said suddenly.

He took a moment before he said, "I miss you too."

"So tell me something."

"What?"

"Do you see anyone?"

"I see a lot of people. I work in a big office."

She laughed, "No, I mean in a romantic way."

"Do you want me to make you jealous or do you want the truth?"

She giggled again, "I want the truth."

He took a deep breath and let it out. "I've interacted with a few. Even, um, shared their beds with them. But nothing ever got serious."

"Going to bed with someone is pretty serious, Gale."

"Yeah, I know. But it's like you said that once, I was lonely. But the last time a woman invited to her place, I turned her down. And I did it…" He paused. "I did it so I could come home and call you. You're pretty special, Annie."

She whispered, "What does that mean?"

"I don't know yet." He said softly.

She let that hang between them a moment. It frightened her what they could turn into. She finally said, "You said you shared _their_ beds. Does that mean you never brought anyone to your home?"

"Never. I don't want to do that unless it's a commitment for something serious. Like I said, none of it was ever serious."

"That makes sense."

"So has there ever been anyone else since him?" Gale asked softly.

"No one. Everyone either thinks I'm unstable or their adorable pet. They help me look out for Finn, but I'm nothing to them. I'm just Annie Cresta, the mad girl Finnick Odair fell for."

"You're more than that. You're the girl that beat the odds. You won your Games. You survived all those years of Finnick gone to the Capitol, seeing him with one lover after the next."

"But it was fake, I knew it was. He told me."

"I'm sure you doubted at least once."

"I did. More than once. Every year, I wondered if maybe this year he'd meet a woman who was worth more than the money he was offered and more than the unstable girl waiting back home. But he always came back to me."

He could hear the smile in her voice. But also the tremble.

"I still go out there and wait for him. Like maybe one day I'll just see him coming out of the water. He dove in far off where I couldn't see him and swam around to surprise me." She sighed.

"It's a beautiful dream, Annie."

"It is, isn't it?" She sniffed. "I'll let you go."

"Remember to call me if you need."

"I will."

Gale looked at the phone for a long time after he hung it up. He wished so badly he could go to her and pull her into his arms and tell her everything would be all right. But she was an eight hour train ride away.

* * *

_Finn was swimming. Annie stood on the shore and watched. She was about to go out to meet him when she saw him pulled under._

" _Finn!" She yelled and ran into the water._

_He shot to the surface sputtering and screaming. "Mom! Mom!" He went under again._

" _Finn! Baby, I'm coming!" She swam for all she was worth, but he kept getting farther and farther away. "Finn! Finn!"_

"Finn!" Annie gasped as she opened her eyes. She blinked a few times. She was dry. She was in her bed. She threw the blanket off and ran to the room across the hall.

Finn was still lying there. She walked slowly to him and leaned over him. She watched the gentle rise and fall of his chest. His eyes moved behind his eyelids as he dreamed. A small smile played on his lips.

She let out the breath she didn't realize she'd been holding.

Finn stirred in his sleep, rolling onto his side away from her.

She wiped at a tear. There was the pull, the fear that she wasn't good enough to keep her son alive and safe. She turned back to her room and stepped over to her bed. Before she climbed in though, she hurried to the living room. She picked up the phone and dialed the number without a second thought.

Gale picked up on the third ring. "Annie?" His voice was worried.

"I had a dream, Gale. One worse than any dream of the Games or losing Finnick."

"Tell me."

"My son was drowning. He was drowning and I couldn't save him." Her voice was desperate.

"Did you check on him?"

"I did. He's dreaming about something that's making him smile."

"Good." He yawned, "How are you?"

"Not good." A tear fell from her eye. "I feel the pull, Gale. I feel it. Help me."

"I'll do what I can, Annie."

A sob rocked her body. "He looks like his father so much when he smiles. He always looks like him, but more when he smiles."

"Stay with me, Annie." He begged. Why was he so far away? "Tell me what to do."

"I'm not the one who tells people what to do. Finnick does. I just follow his lead."

"No. You can make your choices. You have for ten years."

"Have I?" She said softly. "Have I really?"

"How else did you survive?"

"I did what I thought he would have done."

"Good."

She said softly, "Finn doesn't know about him."

"What?"

"I never tell Finn about his father. It hurts me too much. It cuts deep to think about him. And I go away."

"He wants to know who Finnick was."

"Gale, I can't."

"You can. And he deserves to know. You talk to me about him sometimes."

"I tell you things I can't tell him."

"You can tell him other things. He wants it. He needs it."

She took in a shaky breath and let it out. "Can you come for another visit?"

"I'm out of days. I'm sorry. Can you come here? When's Finn's next school break?"

"Next week is the start of summer vacation."

"Then come see me. I only have two rooms, but Finn can sleep on the couch. It's pretty comfortable, I sleep there a lot."

"Are you sure you want us there? You don't let anyone in your apartment."

"I never said I didn't let anyone in my apartment, just not girls I'm only going to sleep with once or twice. You're not just anyone. You're Annie. You're my friend. You and Finn are the best friends I have. So I'm happy to open my door to you."

She smiled, feeling the pressure lifting slightly, feeling a different pull. "I'll talk to Finn and get it all settled. I'll call you with the details."

"Will you be okay until then?"

"I think so. When I have something good to look forward to, it gets a little easier. I don't have many of those, but sometimes… Thank you, Gale."

"It's nothing. Get some sleep, Annie. I'll talk to you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow."

Annie went back to her bedroom and curled up under the blanket. She drifted back to sleep fairly easily. Thinking of seeing her friend in just a few days was a bright spot. She could hold it together for a few more days.

* * *

"So, Finn," Annie said, setting a bowl of porridge in front of him the next morning.

"So, Mom?" Finn said, dumping several sugar cubes into the steaming concoction and stirring.

She smiled and sat down with her own bowl. "What would you think about spending your first week off school out of town?"

"District Twelve to see Katniss and Peeta again?"

She shook her head. "Would you like to see what Two looks like?"

His smile lit up his face. "To see Gale?"

She nodded and let out a laugh at his joy. "To see Gale."

He jumped up and threw his arms around her. "Yes, yes, yes!"

She patted his back. She gently pushed him back, "As long as you do well in school for the rest of the week. Don't get in trouble. Do your best in all your classes."

"Okay. I promise. Can I call Gale?"

"He's at work, sweetie."

"He said we could call him at work."

"You have to be out the door for school in ten minutes." She smiled, "But go on."

He squealed and ran to the phone. He dialed the work number they'd taped to the table, even though both had it memorized.

"Gale Hawthorne." He said.

"Gale, it's Finn."

"Hey, Finn. Is something wrong?" He was on alert.

"No, nothing wrong. Mom just told me we coming to see you when I go on summer vacation."

He chuckled, "She did, huh? And what are your thoughts on that?"

"I can't wait. Will we get to see where you work?"

"I think I can arrange that. What else would you like to do?"

"I don't know. I can't think right now. I'm too excited."

Gale laughed, "I know. I am too. So, get yourself to school, do well, behave, and I'll see you in a few days. Okay?"

"Okay. Good-bye, Gale."

"Good-bye, buddy."

Annie took the phone. "Hey."

"Hey."

"I'm going to call the train station today and get our tickets arranged. Talk to Dale about keeping an eye on the house. Start getting everything settled."

"Good." He paused. "I can't wait to see you, Annie. I can't wait to see the both of you."

"Well, we can't wait to see you either." She smiled to herself. "I'll let you get back to work."

"Okay. Bye."

She turned to see Finn staring at her.

"You love Gale." He accused with a teasing smile. He looked so much like his father.

"I do not." She shot back. "We're just friends. You need to get to school."

He started singing, "Mom's in love with Gale. Mom's in love with Gale."

She laughed, "Enough of that, Finn. Get to school."

He continued his song all the way out the door and sang it louder as he walked past the window.

Annie laughed, went to the window, and called out, "Finnick Cresta Odair, you will be in so much trouble if you don't stop that."

Finn ran back to the window. He pressed his face to it. "Yeah, right." He ran off laughing joyfully. His song had stopped.

It warmed Annie's heart to know that if something _did_ happen, her son approved. It didn't stop her from still feeling guilty for the feeling of warmth she got when she thought about Gale or talked to him.

"What do you think, Finnick?" She asked aloud. "Is it time? Do you approve?"

She stood a few moments, waiting for the answer. When it didn't come, she took several shaky breaths and then started her early preparations for the trip the next week.


	18. Chapter 18

Gale smiled into the phone as he picked it up, "Hello?"

Finn spoke in a rush, "Gale, I told all my friends about the trip. Mom says we're leaving on Friday. I get out of school at noon. Our train will leave at about one."

"That would get you here around nine." He said.

"Mom wants to know if that's okay."

"That's perfectly fine. Tell her I'll be waiting."

"You can tell her yourself in a second. But I have a question."

"What question?"

Finn whispered into the phone, "Do you love my mom?"

"Why are you asking?"

His answer was close to his normal volume. "Because I think she loves you."

Gale heard Annie's voice say, "Okay, that's enough of that nonsense. Give me that phone and go do your homework."

Gale was unsure for a moment what to say to Annie when she pressed the phone to her ear. He knew by her reactions to him when they kissed that there was something more than friendship between them. He felt it at least. But he didn't want to pressure her because he liked being her friend. He would do everything in his power to remain her friend, even if it meant his heart breaking again.

"Hey there. What was that all about?" He asked.

"Oh, nothing. Finn's just fantasizing."

"It's a nice fantasy."

She paused. "So, you're fine to meet us at the station? You won't be working?"

"Why did you change the subject?"

"Because we're just friends, Gale. I don't want anything more than that."

"Okay. Then, yes, I'll be there to get you. I work six to six. I'll have Sunday off, but I think I can arrange to bring you around and show you the offices and other non-restricted areas on Saturday. If you want to, that is."

"It sounds exciting. And I know Finn will like it."

"And I'll show you around a little on Sunday so that you don't get lost when I'm at work. There's a nice market a block over from me and parks and gardens. And a lot of nice people that will probably be really excited to see I have female company staying the week, even if her son's in tow. Probably _especially_ if your son's in tow."

She hesitated, "I'm sorry about Finn."

"Asking if I was in love with you?"

"Yeah."

"Why are you apologizing for that? Why would that be a bad thing?"

"I'm unavailable, Gale."

"It's been ten years—"

"Stop. I'm not talking about this. We're just friends."

"Friends who share kisses? Heated kisses?"

"I will hang up this phone."

"Sorry."

There was silence on the other end.

"Do you not trust me?"

"I do trust you." She said softly. "But, Gale, I love him."

"I know you do. But don't you think you could love me too? Somewhere in your heart, is there room for me?"

"Is there room for me in yours? Because you still pine for Katniss. I know you do."

"She's married. She has been for years."

"But?"

"But I do still have feelings for her." He admitted softly.

"Then you know how I feel. He was my husband. He's the father of my son."

"And he's dead."

"Don't start this fight with me, Gale. I can't do it."

"Okay. I'm sorry."

She was silent.

"Are you going to be okay?"

"Yeah." She said softly.

"I really am sorry. But we promised each other honesty, remember? And honestly, I don't know what's going on with us, Annie, but I'd like to talk more about it."

"We're friends. That's the way we have to stay."

"Why?"

Her voice was thick. "I can't let him go. If I do, I'll lose it."

"I'm sorry I'm not Finnick." He said flatly.

"That's not it."

"That's exactly it." He was harsh. "You're just too stuck in the past, Annie."

She didn't say anything for a long time. He waited, knowing his words hurt her, but needing her to respond.

"Don't hate me for telling the truth."

"Gale," she said softly. "I know I'm stuck in the past. But I feel like it would be cheating Finnick if you and I were together. I know he's dead. I know he's not coming back. But I also know if I try to move on, I'll start to forget." Her voice changed as she started crying. Every word was so difficult for her to say. "I can't forget. I have to tell Finn about his father. I'm not ready to tell him just yet. And he needs to know everything."

"Then you find a way to keep those memories that doesn't keep pulling you down. It's dragging at your relationship with your son and it—" he cut himself off. What he had almost said would only make it worse. He went on, "I just want you to get to a better place, Annie. For yourself, for your son, and for Finnick. Because I know he wouldn't want you to live your life like this."

"You're right, he wouldn't. I'm just not ready, Gale."

"Well, you take your time. I'll be here."

"You shouldn't lose out because of me."

"It's not losing out." He said softly.

"Maybe we can talk about this when we can see each other."

"I'd like that."

"I'm scared, Gale." Her voice trembled.

"Scared of what?"

"Losing him."

"He'll always be there, Annie."

"Yes, he's always there, but he's not. I feel him. I hear a sound and I think it's him, but it's not. It never is. That's what happened that last day you were here. I got lost in a memory. I imagined the shower door opening." She lowered her voice. "He used to… But, he didn't that time. And I remembered he wouldn't be there ever again. And I got so angry. I got angry at everything and everyone. I was angry at myself. And I get like that a lot. And that's when I go away. It's when I want to go away for good."

"But you promised me you wouldn't."

"And I promised Finnick I'd be his forever."

Gale had to set the phone down for a second. What she was saying was hurting him more than anything he'd ever heard her say. He was getting too close. He needed to back off. Needed to, but never would because he wanted her too badly.

He put the phone back to his ear. "Just hang on for a few more days, Annie. You'll be here and we can talk this out better."

There was silence on the other end.

"Annie? Annie, are you there?"

"I'm here." Her voice was small. He imagined she curled herself up into the corner of the couch as she tried to disappear.

"Hold on for me, Annie." Gale begged. "Please."

"I'll try."

"That's all I can ask."

They stayed on the phone for a while longer, but Gale heard Annie slipping away more and more with every word. She made all the moves to get off.

He begged, "Please be all right, Annie."

"I just need to sleep, Gale."

"Just sleep. And I'll see you on Friday. I'll talk to you every day in between if you need to."

"I'll need to."

"Okay. Good."

She said softly, "I really can't let him go."

He sighed, "I know."

"Don't hold it against me."

"I don't. Just get some sleep."

"We'll talk tomorrow."

* * *

Annie's spirits lifted a little over the next few days as she and Finn finished their packing. She avoided any bits of conversation with Gale that had to do with Finnick and her feelings. And he took the hint, keeping to safe topics like Finn's final days at school and some of the things they could possibly all do together when the trip to District Two was a reality.

Annie counted the few hours to the trip while Finn was at school by doing a few last minute spot cleanings of the house. Really there wasn't much. She'd been obsessively cleaning all week. It helped her keep her mind off things sometimes.

She had Finn's backpack flung over her shoulder and her own suitcase in her hand when she walked into the station. Finn was already there, bouncing on his toes and looking for her expectantly. She passed over the backpack and led the way to the counter to check in and pick up their tickets.

The train pulled up and the other passengers got out. They were allowed to board. The train eventually started rolling down the tracks. Finn kept his eyes glued to the window, eagerly watching the terrain change.

Annie watched him for a while. But her mind kept drifting back to her first ever train ride all those years before when she was taken to the Capitol for the Games. She shook herself many times and forced herself back to the present. She reached over and smoothed a hand over her son's hair. That helped.

Finn's head drifted to Annie's shoulder near the end of the trip. He had worn himself out in his excitement. She wrapped her arms around him and let him take a nap.

He snapped awake as the train slowed. They could both see Gale waiting out on the platform. Finn zoomed out the door as soon as the train stopped.

Annie followed more slowly, but with just as much enthusiasm. Finn was still talking happily about the train ride when she stepped up.

Gale immediately pulled her into his arms. He smoothed his hand over her hair. He kissed her temple. He breathed her in. "You're here." He said softly.

She turned her face up, "Yes, we're here. We made it." She stepped away from him awkwardly and looked down. She felt eyes on here. Everyone knew who she was.

He put a finger under her chin and lifted her face up again. "It's okay." He said softly. He reached out and took her suitcase from her. "Let's go." He ruffled Finn's hair with a chuckle. Then he wrapped his free arm around Annie and led them out the doors.

Finn chattered non-stop as they walked the two blocks to Gale's apartment building. They stashed her things in the spare room.

Gale said, "Are you two hungry? I know the food on the train's not great."

"I could eat." Finn said.

Annie laughed, "You can always eat. I think you're going through a growth spurt." She turned her smile to her friend. "But I'm hungry, too, actually."

"I'll take you to my favorite diner. The waitress always flirts with me." He leaned to Annie. "You can make her jealous."

"I doubt that." She said, blushing slightly.

"I don't."

They walked into the diner, Finn still babbling. He'd moved on to talking about his friends and what they were doing that summer. They sat down in a booth, the boy pushing his mother to sit beside Gale on one side as he took the other for himself.

The man smiled and stretched his arm along the back. He leaned in and whispered, "You look really pretty."

She blushed.

Kate walked over and smiled kindly. "Well, Soldier Hawthorne, you brought friends with you."

Gale smiled and introduced the two.

"Well, isn't that exciting, traveling to our District." She said, looking between the three. "What can I get you to drink? Your usual, sir?"

He smiled, "I would love a cup of coffee, thank you, Kate." He looked to the others. "They have great juices. Their tea is also pretty good." He tucked a piece of hair behind Annie's ear. "Everything is good."

Annie shrugged off his hand. "I'll just have water, please." She said softly, picking up her menu.

"May I have some orange juice?" Finn asked.

Kate smiled, "Yes you may. I'll be back with your drinks in just a bit and give you time to look over the menu."

She walked away. Annie smiled at Gale, "She's cute."

"Yeah." Gale said softly. "She's the one I turned down."

"Is she?" She looked at him for a few moments. Part of her wanted to touch him, but the other part felt it was wrong. That betrayal she'd told him about. "I hope it was worth it."

"It was." He leaned over and kissed her cheek.

Finn giggled behind his menu.

Annie blushed and looked back down at her own.

Kate returned and took their order. She flirted with Gale. Annie thought it was amusing to see him working so hard to make her jealous.

The girl walked away and Annie leaned over to whisper, "It's not working."

He laughed. "Then why say something?"

She smiled. "Just felt like rubbing in your face. But keep having fun. You're very adorable."

"Adorable? I called you pretty, I get adorable?"

"There's no need for me to say anything to boost your ego, it's already big enough." She teased.

He laughed, "That hurts. I'm not that self-centered."

"Of course you are." She patted his knee under the table. "But I still like you."

He caught her hand and brought it to his lips, "Good to know."

She gently slapped at him and pulled her hand free. "Stop it. You're not impressing her. She's not even watching."

He looked over her head. "You're right. I have to do something to call attention to myself."

She laughed, "Stop it, Gale."

"Okay, but you need to do something for me."

"What?"

Without a word, he leaned over and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. He pulled away and looked at her critically for a moment. "Was that all right? I feel like I didn't really say hello before that."

She opened her mouth to say something, but she didn't know if it was all right or not. She closed her mouth and looked away. Her son was looking at her intently. She looked between the two. "It was fine. But I asked you not to."

"I know you did."

She was quiet the rest of the time in the diner, letting Gale and Finn talk and catch up. And she was happy for it. She and Finn didn't talk much when they were at home. He talked a lot, but his conversations were pretty one-sided.

And she loved the way her son was looking at Gale. It was like he was the most important person in the world. He was looking at him like he was a god. Annie reached across the table and patted his hand.

He turned a smile on her for a moment, but went right back to Gale. He tried to suppress a yawn, but was unsuccessful.

"Well, I guess that means our meal has ended." Gale said. He put his arm around Annie's shoulders. "Are you going to let me out or am I trapped in here forever?"

She smiled and scooted out of the bench.

He grabbed her hand and squeezed it as he stood.

She smiled and removed her hand from his.

Finn was asleep almost as soon as he stretched out on the couch.

Annie stood outside the door to the extra bedroom, watching Gale turn out the few lights left on in the apartment.

He walked over and stood in front of her. He lifted his hand and gently touched her face.

"Gale…" She said, closing her eyes and leaning into his touch.

He kissed her forehead. "I'm glad you're both here, Annie."

She opened her eyes and tentatively lifted her hand. She placed it on his cheek. She slid it down and around his neck. Her other arm came up and wrapped around his back. She pressed herself up on her toes and kissed his cheek.

Gale's arms came around her back and held her close.

A sigh escaped Annie. "I'm glad too. I feel stretched in so many different directions. With you around, at least there's someone giving Finn the full attention he deserves."

"And you too." He rubbed her back. "You deserve someone giving you their full attention."

She lifted her head from his shoulder and looked in his eyes. She blinked a few times. She kissed his cheek again and then removed herself from his arms. "Good night, Gale."

"Good night."

"When were we leaving again?"

"About nine? That's okay, right?"

"Yes, that's fine. I'm glad you were able to go in later."

"Me too." He placed his hand on her cheek once more and then turned and shut himself in his room without another word.

Annie went into her room. She was so conflicted with her feelings for Gale and how to deal with them. She loved the way he touched her, so gentle. But she feared what would happen if she gave in.

She climbed into the bed. She was so exhausted from the trip and her worry that sleep came easily.


	19. Chapter 19

As they made the trek to the office complex, Gale couldn't help but let his hand wander into Annie's more than once.

She looked over at him and shook her head each time as she removed her hand from his.

Finn was full of questions about what Gale did and how everything worked. Gale answered them as best he could. He told them he mostly filled out a lot of paperwork and talked to people at all levels of the government. He also had a lot of meetings for different types of security and safety committees.

They walked into the building. Gale had to remind the people in the front office about his visitors. It had already been approved, but they needed to be asked a few questions. A background check had been performed on them when Gale originally requested permission for their visit.

Of course, they were just standard procedure. Everyone knew who Annie was and, despite a lot of people still being under the impression that she was completely bonkers, they knew she was harmless. The two were issued visitors' passes which they were told to display at all times.

Gale led them first to his office. He had to check in and get his messages before he could do anything else.

He introduced the pair to his assistant as he took the stack of messages from the younger man.

"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you both." Soldier Cole said. "Hawthorne has talked about the two of you coming for a few days."

"Talking about us, huh?" Finn asked, looking between his mother and Gale, who was still reading over his messages.

Gale spoke without looking up, "I warned them to keep their eye out for you, Finn." He tapped him on the head with his papers. "So that you'd stay out of trouble." He winked. "Come on in my office, I have to return a couple of these."

Annie and Finn followed him through the door behind the assistant's desk. Gale sat down and picked up his phone.

He smiled, "Take a look around and make yourselves comfortable. This shouldn't take long."

Annie and Finn both started looking around the office. It was a modest room. A large wooden desk sat in the middle of the room. There was a window behind it looking out onto the city. Two chairs sat in front of the desk. There was a couch along the wall just inside the door. A book shelf sat along the wall to one side of the desk. The opposite wall to the book case held a cabinet with a few whatnots on it. There were pictures scattered around with Gale's family. The walls above the cabinet held a few certificates.

Annie wandered over to the book shelf and started looking at the titles.

"You won't find anything interesting up there." Gale said from behind her. "Unless you find military strategy or weapons history interesting."

"Weapons? That's part of your work too?" She reached up and touched the spines, running her hands over them.

He stared at her fingers as they slid over the books. "Yeah. They still want to keep up-to-date on our weapons supply. They don't want us to be behind if something should go wrong somewhere."

"Do you think that will happen?"

He pointed to one particularly thick volume. "That book contains a rough overview of every documented war in history. It starts in ancient times and goes up to the events of ten years ago. I've looked through it. I've gathered that we're all doomed to repeat our mistakes because, no matter how hard we try during peace times, someone always grows weary of how things are going."

"Does it talk about the Games?"

"It mentions them." He pointed out another set of three books. "Seventy-five years of the Hunger Games reduced to only a few books. One volume for each quarter. Mostly overviews of each of the Games, but there's some more in depth biographies of a few of the notable Victors."

"Am I in there?"

He smoothed a hand over her hair. "You are." He leaned over and kissed her hair. He whispered, "There's plenty of Finnick in there too. A lot more than anyone else. He was popular. You can borrow them if you want. If you think it will help."

She shrugged. "Maybe just let Finn borrow it." She looked around. "Are you done with your calls?"

"I am." He draped his arm over her shoulder. "Let's go on that tour."

He led them from floor to floor, introducing them to all the people that he interacted with. All of them mentioned how much Gale talked about them. Gale always shrugged it off, but Annie watched his face. He looked proud, happy to be showing them off and to be showing off the place where he worked.

Annie slipped her arm around his waist as they walked down to the training ground.

He looked down at her and smiled. He wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close to him. He whispered, "How are you holding up?"

She shrugged, "As good as can be expected, I guess. Like always." She looked around at the people passing them in the halls. She dropped her arm. "Well, I suppose as good as I expect from myself. I don't think the rest of the world expects much from me."

"They watch you. They care." They continued to walk on.

Finn asked if he had to go to the training grounds.

"It's not required because of the nature of my job being mainly paperwork and development. But I take some time to use the grounds. I work with a group a few times a week."

They walked through a set of doors and out into a large yard. A group was working on some hand-to-hand exercises. Along a back wall, there were several different types of practice weapons. They stood and watched the group working for a while in silence. Finn was transfixed by the dance.

Annie noticed his look of awe. She reached out her hand and placed it in her son's shoulder. She didn't say anything, but her pleading look said all the words she couldn't. She didn't want him to be a part of the group that had lured her husband away to his death.

Gale saw the exchange. "We also have a gym. I use that more often." He led them across the yard to another set of doors.

There were a few people scattered around on the different types of weights.

"How often do you use it?" Annie asked. She watched him. She remembered the day they all played with the water and his shirt clinging to his muscular chest stomach. That must have taken a lot of work.

"I come here at least three times a week. It depends on how busy I am."

Finn demanded, "How much can you lift?"

He laughed, "I can bench press one-eighty."

"Wow."

"It's nothing. Several of the more serious soldiers, the ones that actually train for combat, can do two hundred or more."

His two friends told him it was still pretty impressive how much he could lift. He waved them off and led them out of the room. He led them to the front of the building. He pulled a card out of his pocket and scribbled onto the back of it. He handed it to Annie.

"This is the address to my apartment in case you get lost. Ask anyone, they're pretty helpful."

She smiled, "Thank you. I think we can find it."

"Good." He looked at her for a few moments. He wanted to pull her into his arms and kiss her. Instead, he turned to Finn and ruffled his hair. "See you in a few hours, kiddo. Take care of your mom."

He smiled, "I will."

He waited until they were out the door and on their way before he went back to his office.

* * *

When Gale walked into his apartment, it took him a moment to remember if he had opened the right door. He had to look at the number on the door. The sounds and scents of his home were far too domestic.

"Hey." He called, walking into the tiny kitchen.

Annie looked up and smiled, "Hi. How was the rest of your day?"

"Long." He walked over to where she stood at the stove. Finn stood beside her, chopping up some vegetables. He ruffled the boy's hair. "How was yours?"

Annie said, "Well, we found the market you mentioned and bought some things so I could cook for you while I'm here."

"You didn't have to do that."

"No, but I wanted to. Cooking helps me sometimes."

He looked in through the living room. "You cleaned, too?"

"You don't mind, do you?"

"No, I don't guess so. But you're a guest, not my maid."

"I wanted to do it, Gale."

He nodded. "Well, thank you. You're going to spoil me. I may not let you leave at the end of the week."

She laughed, "I'd miss the ocean too much of you made me stay."

"Yeah, I know."

Annie continued to stir the pot in front of her.

Gale impulsively wrapped his arms around her from behind dropped his head onto her shoulder.

"Gale." She said softly. It was supposed to be a warning, but it came out sounding more like an endearment.

He kissed her cheek and then stepped away. "Is there something I can do to help?"

"No, I got it. If you and Finn just want to relax, I'll finish this up."

"Sounds good." He walked over to a drawer and pulled out a deck of playing cards. "You up for a game, Finn?"

"Sure." He sat down his knife and followed the man into the living room.

Annie turned and watched them for a few moments before turning around to the meal. She thought about how comfortable Gale was around her. She liked how his arms felt around her. But she still felt the pull of the betrayal to Finnick.

Her eyes turned back to Gale and Finn playing cards at the coffee table. He was so kind. He was great with her son.

"Finnick." She said softly. "Do you see this?" She clamped her mouth shut. Of course he couldn't see. He wasn't there. She clenched her teeth to ward off the hysteria she felt bubbling inside her.

"Annie?" Gale asked from the living room.

"I'm fine." She said and went back to cooking.


	20. Chapter 20

Annie leaned against the wall and watched as the two finished their hand. Finn's face was set with concentration.

He sat down his hand, "Full house." He looked up expectantly at Gale.

The man folded up his hand and sat it down. "You win."

"You're not going to show me your hand?"

He turned them over. "Pair of twos, that's it."

"Are you teaching my son to play poker?" Annie asked.

He looked up sheepishly. "Maybe I am."

She let out a laugh. "I'm sure your father would have taught you long before now."

Finn smiled expectantly at his mother. "Would he?"

"Yes." She swallowed. She wanted to stop talking, but the look on his face was so determined. "He was very rotten sometimes. He used to tease me that we would never have to work because of our combined Victors pensions from the Capitol, so he'd teach you how to gamble to make extra money." Her throat tightened and tears slipped from her eyes. She swallowed, "Supper is ready." She turned to go back into the kitchen.

"Mom?" Finn asked.

She turned.

"Thank you."

She nodded and wiped at her eyes. They were streaming now. "I'm sorry." She went into the spare room and shut the door. She leaned against the closed door and slid down it as she was taken in by her depression. She curled up into a ball on the floor.

"Annie?" Gale asked softly.

She said nothing.

"I'm proud of you, Annie." He said.

"It hurts, Gale."

"I know. But it's a start, isn't it?"

There was still no response.

"Please come out."

"Just give me a minute."

"I'll set the table. And we'll wait for you."

"Okay."

Annie heard him walk away. She sat up and took several breaths. "Help me do it." She said. "I need your help."

She pushed herself up and leaned against the door for several more breaths. She opened the door and walked back into the kitchen. Gale filled a plate for her when she walked in.

Finn wanted to ask more questions about his dad, but he knew that if he pushed too hard, he could make it worse. He'd seen it happen once when he was younger. He kept asking about how his parents had met and fallen in love. She said she'd tell him some other time, but he kept on asking. She told him to go to Dale's house and then closed herself in her room.

He instead asked Gale about hunting. He asked about where he practiced with his bow because he didn't show them that.

He explained, "There's a range in one of the outer buildings."

"Where do you keep your bow?"

"It's hidden." He said with a grin and a wink.

Annie said, "Under your bed so you can shoot intruders?" She had a small smile on her face.

He smiled at her. "In my closet, actually."

"You're not afraid one of us will take it?" She asked.

"I'd like to see you try to shoot it. The tension it pretty high and you have scrawny arms."

"My arms aren't scrawny." She said defensively. "I can swim better than you."

"You can, I'm sure. But you never showed me. Anyway, that's a different set of muscles." He brushed hair off her cheek. "You want to see?"

"The bow?"

"Yeah. It's pretty. It's red oak." He was wistful.

"You sound like you're in love."

He looked at her a moment and then said, "Not with my bow."

She sat back, uncomfortable with what he was implying. She cleared her throat. "I don't think I'm a match to your bow. But thank you for the offer."

Finn asked, "Is it the same one you had at the Capitol?"

"It's different. The one at the Capitol is the official one. The one I'd use in combat. I even have special arrows with different functions. All that's at the armory, though. The one I have here is my personal one. I had it made a few years ago."

"Can we see it?" the boy asked, his voice full of excitement.

"Sure. After supper. Eat your vegetables."

Annie caught his eye and smiled. She reached her hand over and rested it on top of his.

Gale turned his hand over and wrapped his fingers around hers. "You okay?"

"I'm better." She said softly. She squeezed his hand and then removed it.

Finn watched. "You should just kiss her already, Gale. You know you want to."

"Finn." Annie warned.

"You want to, too, Mom."

Gale said, "Finn, your mom and I are just friends. There will be no kissing."

The boy was dejected. He really wanted his mother to be happy more often and he noticed that when Gale was around, she was herself more often. "You're lonely." He said softly.

"What was that?" Gale asked.

"Mom. You're lonely. I know you are. Gale makes it better. He always makes it better." He picked at his food. "All the other kids have two parents. Even if one's dead, they know about them. You only tell me bits and pieces. I want everything. And I want you to be with Gale."

"That's a lot of requests, Finn." Annie said softly. "First of all, Gale and I are friends. There isn't anything more than that. As to your father…" Her voice faltered. "I will tell you when I'm ready."

"You're never ready." He threw his fork down and stormed out of the room. He flung himself down on the couch.

Annie put her face in her hands.

Gale reached over and rubbed her back. "It's okay."

She shook her head, "No, it's not." She looked up. "What do I do?"

"You need to find a way before you lose him." He wiped tears off her cheeks. "It's hard, I know."

"I'm being selfish." She got up and started clearing the table.

He got up to help. "How are you being selfish?"

She leaned against the counter. She said quietly, "I don't want to lose him. I want to keep him close to me. I had to share him for so many years, that when he was mine, I grabbed on. I held onto the real Finnick for years while everyone saw the show."

He stepped in front of her. "I didn't always see the show. I fought with him, remember?"

"Then you can tell him what you know."

"He wants to hear it from you."

"I can't do it, Gale." She wrapped her arms around him and rested her head on his shoulder. "I can't."

His arms came around her. "You can. You told him a little already."

"And you saw what happened to me." She pressed her eyes into his shoulder. "Knowing a little from you will be enough for now." She looked up at him. "Please?"

He looked at her eyes. "Storm's rolling in." he said softly. "How can I make it go away?"

"I don't know." She said, a hint of desperation in her voice.

He kissed her forehead. "We'll weather the storm together."

She nodded. "I need to talk to my son." She unwrapped her arms from him. Annie sat down on the floor by Finn's head. She smoothed a hand over his hair.

"Why won't you tell me anything?" He asked.

"You know how much it hurts me."

"Yeah, but I deserve answers."

"I know you do, Finn. He was your father. I loved him very much. Losing him was hard. It was hard because I never fully had him for a long time. And when I finally did, it wasn't for long. I just need you to understand that."

"But I never knew him at all. It's not fair."

"I know, baby." She looked at him for a few moments as she continued to smooth her fingers through his hair. "You have my eyes, but the rest of your face is his. I always liked his nose. It was just so perfect on his face. The way it's perfect on yours."

A tear slipped out of his eye. "Yeah?"

She wiped the tear away. "Yeah."

"You don't have to tell me anymore tonight."

She kissed his forehead. "I'll make sure you know him. Bit-by-bit, whenever I can. Okay?"

He smiled, "Okay."

She kissed him again and went back into the kitchen to help with clean-up.

Gale wiped a thumb across each of her cheeks. "You gonna be okay?"

"I don't know." She looked at him. His eyes were so tender, so concerned.

And before she even knew what she was doing, she reached up and pulled his face to hers. As their lips met, Gale wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer. Her hand moved up to tangle in his hair as she opened her mouth and deepened the kiss.

Gale couldn't believe it was happening. He leaned back against the counter and let her lean against him. He slid his hand up her back and gently held the back of her head. He didn't ever want this to end.

There was a small giggle from the living room and Annie jumped away. They both looked to see Finn watching them over the arm of the couch.

"I knew it." The boy laughed.

Annie felt her cheeks heating up. She looked over to see Gale was a little red too.

"Well…" She said.

Gale turned around and went back to washing the dishes. "Sorry."

"No, don't be sorry." She said softly.

They finished washing and putting away the dishes in silence. Afterward, they sat in the living room together. Finn and Gale played a few more hands of cards as Annie watched.

She kept thinking about Finnick. She stood suddenly and said, "I'm going to bed."

"Are you okay?" Gale asked.

"I really don't know." She leaned over and kissed her son on the top of the head. Then she turned to her friend. She looked at him, wanting to touch him, but at the same time not wanting to.

He grabbed her hand and pressed a kiss to the back of it. "Good night, Annie."

"Good night." She turned and walked out of the room.

Finn said, "Maybe I shouldn't have pushed her."

"It's not your fault, Finn." He squeezed the boy's shoulder. "It's Snow's fault. Everything that your mom's going through is because of all he did."

"Why did he have to die? Why does anyone have to die?" Tears slipped down his face.

It twisted Gale's heart. Seeing Annie torn up was one thing. She fluctuated between her depression and happiness with a regularity that he understood. Finn had always been strong. He had always been too strong. Gale should have seen this coming.

Finn started sobbing and dropped his cards down on the table.

Gale reached over and pulled him closer. "It's all right, buddy. I know it's hard. You just let it all out. I have you."

He cried and cried until he was exhausted. He stretched out on the couch.

Gale pulled the blanket up over the boy's shoulders. He went about his nightly routine and then headed to his bedroom. Annie had her door slightly open. He knocked.

"Yes?" She called softly.

"Are you okay?"

She opened her door.

"You worry too much, Gale."

"No, I don't." He reached up and lightly touched her cheek. "I don't want your time here to be one bad moment after another."

"Everything was fine until I said something about Finnick."

"Well, it did get a little better. I liked how you were at dinner." He smiled, "And if you're so about just being my friend, maybe you should stop kissing me."

She smiled and looked down. "I don't know why I did that."

"Hey." He put his finger under her chin and lifted her face up. "There's nothing wrong with it. You know that, right?"

"It still feels so wrong."

"I know." He ran his thumb over her lips.

She gently pushed his hand away. "Please, don't."

"Sorry." He leaned down and kissed her forehead.

"Good night, Gale." She said, stepping back.

"Good night." He stood there for a few more seconds. Then he turned and went to his room, closing his door behind him.


	21. Chapter 21

Gale woke up to the sound of the TV playing softly in the living room. He looked over at his clock to see that it was almost nine. He sat up and stretched. He sat for a minute and reveled in the thought of a day off spent with his friends.

He walked into the living room and smiled at Finn. "Morning, kid."

"Morning. You don't mind I turned on the TV, do you?"

"It's fine. You want some breakfast?" He walked into the kitchen. He opened up his refrigerator. "Wow, you and Annie really socked up."

Finn wandered in after him. "Mom likes to cook. When she's happy, she cooks a lot."

"And when she's not?"

"I do the cooking. She showed me a few things. Dale taught me more. I figured a lot out on my own."

He ruffled the boy's hair, "I'm sorry."

"Why?"

"Because…" He turned around and pulled some eggs out of the fridge. "I'm sorry your father died. And I'm sorry with what it's done to your mom." He put some ham in a pan to fry and then started working on scrambling some eggs. "You know, I was there."

"When my dad died?"

"Yeah."

"Will you tell me?"

"Uh, yeah." He continued working as he spoke. "So we had been running for a while. We were presumed dead, but not for long. These mutts, muttations, were sent out to find Katniss. We were underground and trying to get above. Finnick was right behind me. We lost a few of our group to pods, traps. We found a ladder. Peeta and Katniss and a couple others were all ahead. I reached for the ladder and heard a commotion behind me. I looked back and they had him." He stopped.

"You don't have to go on. I can guess what happened next." The boy said meekly.

Gale turned. "Sometimes I think I could have saved him. I replay it in my head a lot. I think about all the things that went wrong in that moment. It could have been me. You could have had your dad." He swallowed the thickness in his throat at the threatening tears. He turned back around to finished cooking. "I really am sorry."

They were quiet for a while. Gale sat the pan in the middle of the table with the plate of ham he'd fried. He walked to Annie's room and knocked.

"Gale?" Her voice floated through the crack in the door.

"Yeah. I made breakfast. You hungry?"

"Not really."

He paused. "May I come in?"

"Okay."

He pushed the door open. She was still curled up on her side. He walked over and stood beside the bed. "Are you okay?"

"You ask that a lot."

"I worry about you."

She reached for his hand. "You don't need to worry about me."

He kneeled down. "I do anyway."

"Gale, I heard what you were just telling Finn. About his father's death."

"And?"

"And I think it's time you forgave yourself. There's nothing you could have done."

"There's nothing you could have done either." He kissed her hand. "Please don't stay in here all day."

"I won't. But I'm not hungry right now."

He smiled, "Is it just that you think you can make eggs better than me?"

She leaned closer, "I can do a lot of things better than you."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah." She smiled. She bit her lip and looked at him. Then she pressed a quick kiss to his lips.

He laughed. "Are you implying something?"

"Not about your kissing abilities. Not that I have much to compare it to."

He pushed hair off her cheek. "Come out here with us."

"I can't talk about him. I don't know where to start."

He continued to smooth his hand through her hair. "What if you write it down?"

"Maybe."

He kissed her hand. "I have a journal. My mother gave it to me. She thought it would help me. I haven't even tried using it."

"Help you with what?"

"You're not the only one who goes away sometimes. I just know how to hide it."

"I didn't know."

"You don't fight a war—cause deaths—and not have it affect you."

She ran her fingers through his hair. "I know."

He kissed her. "Come on, breakfast is getting cold."

Annie sat with them, but didn't eat. She drank a cup of tea Gale made for her.

"So, what's the plan for today?" Annie asked softly.

"I thought I'd show you the sights. There aren't many, but there are some nice shops and some kind people to meet."

"Sounds like fun." She looked to her son, "What do you think?"

He nodded, "Sound's good."

Gale laughed, "Good." He tucked a piece of hair behind Annie's ear. "I forgot to tell you something."

She smiled and caught his hand. "What's that?"

"That you're pretty."

"You tell me that every day."

"You're pretty every day."

She kissed his hand and let it go. She finished her tea and stood. "Shower's mine first." She kissed the top of Finn's head as she passed.

As soon as Annie was out of the room, Finn looked at Gale. "Just friends?"

"What?"

Finn gave him a no-nonsense look. "Don't lie to me, Gale."

Gale chuckled. "Well, I like your mom a lot. But I'm still competing with your father."

"So you'd marry her?"

"That's a big step. Right now, we _are_ still friends."

"Friends who hold hands and kiss?"

"Sometimes friends do that."

"I don't do that with my friends."

Gale stood and cleared the table.

"Well, all I'm going to say, Gale, is that if you hurt my mom, I will hurt you. And I'm serious."

He suppressed a laugh. He turned and looked the boy in the face. "I promise you, Finn, that whatever happens with your mom and me, I will do everything in my power not to do anything to hurt her."

"Good." He went on helping him with the breakfast dishes.

Finn hurried into the bathroom after Annie, leaving the adults alone. Gale walked over to Annie and put his hands gently on her face.

"You're going to kiss me, aren't you?"  
"Not if you don't want me to."

"I don't know, Gale. I want you to, but I'm terrified of what could happen."

He kissed her forehead and then stepped away. "Your son threatened me."

She laughed, "He's so tough." She sat down on the couch and watched him walk over to a shelf.

He picked up a book. He sat down beside her, draping his arm over the back of the couch. He held out the book. "Are you going to do it?"

"Write about Finnick?"

He nodded.

"I don't know, Gale." Her eyes clouded over.

He rested his forehead against hers. "I believe in you, Annie."

"You really think this is the best way?"

"What do you think? Will it be easier just to sit him down and talk about it? Or will it be better to write it down as it comes to you and then give it to him to read on his own and then ask questions as they come to him?"

"If I write it down, he can look back over his favorite parts. And he can revisit them as he gets older and see it in a different way." She sat back. "And if anything happens to me, at least he'll have his father." She took the book from him. "Thank you."

"Annie." He said softly. "I don't like it when you talk about you not being here."

"I'm sorry; I did make you a promise. I plan to keep it. I do. But you never know what can happen."

"No, you don't."

Finn came out of the bathroom.

Gale stood. "Okay, my turn." He leaned back down. "Oh, one more thing." He kissed her quickly and then walked away.

"Mom?" Finn asked when they were alone.

"Yes, Finn?"

"I really like Gale."

"I like him too."

"So, I know you're just friends, but if you marry him, where would we live?"

"Well, that would be a very important, very long, conversation he and I would have. You would have a say too."

"Good."

Annie reached out and smoothed her hand over his hair. "But we have nothing to worry about right now."

Gale brought them around to some of the little out-of-the-way places very few people would ever see unless they knew about them. He introduced them to his friends and other acquaintances. And he took every opportunity to touch Annie.

On the walk back that night, she slipped her hand into his and smiled tentatively at him. He squeezed her hand and threaded their fingers together.

Finn smiled and wrapped his arm around his mother's waist. He sang, "Mom's in love with Gale."

Annie laughed, "Stop it, Finn."

He sang it a little louder.

"Finn, people are looking." She warned.

He continued to sing his song and ran around to walk beside Gale.

Gale wrapped his arm around the boy and pulled him close. "That's enough, kid. Your mom said stop."

He gave a sigh, "Okay."

Gale let him go and ruffled his hair. "You're a good kind when you behave."

"I always behave."

Annie laughed, "Sure."

Finn scuffed his shoes as he walked, "Well, I behave when it's convenient."

"That makes more sense. Another way you're like your father."

He smiled. His mom hardly ever said anything about his father and now she'd told him so many things in just a few days. He risked asking, "Did he get into trouble a lot when he was my age?"

"I don't remember him much from that time. I wasn't in school yet. But I remember when he was older, he did." Her voice started to tremble.

Gale squeezed her hand.

Finn said, "If you want to stop, you can now."

"You can ask me questions." She said softly.

"No, I can tell you need to stop."

"Thank you, Finn."

"Thank _you_ , Mom."

They were silent as they made the rest of the trip to the apartment. Annie picked up the journal off the coffee table and took the pen Gale offered and headed off to bed.

Gale stopped her. He gave her a quick kiss. "Good night." He whispered.

"Good night."

He turned to Finn. "I'm heading off to bed myself. I have to get up early for work. You need anything?"

He shook his head.

"You can watch TV if you want. Read a book. Just make yourself at home, okay?"

"Okay."

He ruffled the boy's hair and walked away. He called one last good night through Annie's door and then went to bed.


	22. Chapter 22

When Gale walked into the kitchen the next morning before work to find breakfast, he was surprised to see Annie there. She stood over the stove. She flipped two large pancakes onto a plate when she saw him.

"Good morning." She smiled.

He took the plate and kissed her forehead. "Thank you. Good morning."

She grabbed his face gently. "No forehead kisses." She pressed her lips to his and then went back to the pancake batter. "Do you think you'll want more?"

"No, this is fine. Some mornings I only drink a cup of coffee and eat a couple pieces of toast." He poured syrup over them and then dug in.

"Speaking of coffee." Annie said and sat down a cup beside him.

"You are a doll." He said, taking a sip. "Perfect."

She smiled and put the batter in the fridge and sat down with him. "I'll cook for Finn and me later."

"You really will spoil me." He said softly, brushing his fingers down her cheek.

"I'm just doing everything I can to thank you. The book is helping." She caught his hand and kissed it. "I did a lot of crying last night."

"I'm sorry." He rubbed his thumb across her knuckles.

"It will take a lot of tears to get through it. But I need to for my son."

He nodded. "I'm still here, okay."

"Yeah." She kissed his hand again and then let it go.

He pulled her chair closer and rested his hand on her knee as he ate. "These are really good."

"Thank you. I haven't made pancakes in a while. I had to think about the recipe."

"Well, you did a good job."

"I'm sure the cook at your diner does better."

"No."

She smiled and leaned closer, "You just go there for the company, though, don't you?"

He laughed and kissed her cheek. "Kate has nothing on you, Annie." He finished his coffee and stood to bring his dishes to the kink.

She told him, "I'll wash those later. You go on to work."

"You sure?"

"I am."

"You're not my maid, Annie."

"I know. But I want to do something. I have to."

"What are you and Finn going to do today?"

"Probably revisit some of those stores you showed us yesterday and take a better look around." She stood and stepped in front of him. "What would you like for supper tonight?"

He smiled down at her, "Surprise me." He gave her a soft kiss.

She put her hands on his chest. "We're just friends. I like kissing you." She blushed. "But let's just stay friends who do that. Is that okay? I mean for now. Maybe in a few months we can revisit it."

He smiled and kissed her again. "Okay."

She smiled and patted his chest. "Get to work, Gale. You're going to be late."

He took one more kiss before heading out the door.

As soon as he was gone, Annie took out the journal and sat at the kitchen table. She wrote in it until Finn woke up several hours later. She made breakfast. That afternoon, they trekked to a couple of the shops and bought a few things for themselves that they really didn't need.

They made their way back to Gale's apartment and Annie started making supper as Finn watched TV. She put something in to bake and then sat in a chair in the living room, writing in her journal.

"What's that you're writing, Mom?" he asked.

"It's something for you." She said simply, but said no more.

Gale came in and called, "Honey, I'm home." as he walked into the living room. He smiled at the two.

"I'm not your honey." Annie said with a smile.

He walked over to her and leaned over her in the chair. "Do I get a kiss anyway?"

She turned her face up.

He looked at her for several seconds.

"Well?" She asked.

"I was looking at the weather." He kissed her and then flopped onto the couch beside Finn. He playfully punched him in the shoulder. "You have a good day, buddy?"

"Yeah. Mom and I did some shopping."

"Shopping is good."

"I guess."

"You guess?" he reached over and pulled the boy into a headlock.

Finn laughed, "Hey!" He struggled. "Come on, Gale, let me go."

Annie said, "Don't hurt him, Gale."

"Don't worry, Annie." He rubbed his knuckles on the boy's head.

He squealed and struggled some more. "Stop, Gale." He begged, laughing.

"What was that?" Gale asked.

"Please stop." The boy begged some more.

"Gale." Annie said. There was a bit of an edge to her voice.

Gale let Finn go and reached a hand out to Annie. He smiled reassuringly. "It's fine."

She slipped her hand into his and squeezed it. "Yeah."

An alarm went off in the kitchen and Annie went to see to it. Gale and Finn sat in front of the TV, mindlessly watching it, until Annie told them supper was done.

Gale told them about his day as they ate. He had several meetings and then had several more phone calls to deal with between them all. He told them he was happy with the prospect of actually coming home to someone rather than an empty apartment after such a hectic day.

Finn said, "We could always stay. You and Mom could get married."

"No." Annie said, shooting that down even before Gale could make a joke out of it.

"I just like the idea of us as a family." The boy said as he picked at his food.

"I know you do." Annie said softly. "But Gale and I are just friends for now."

"For now?" Finn said, hopeful.

"You never know what the future holds." She said with a smile.

"So that means you _might_ marry Gale?"

"If, at some point in the future, Gale and I both decide that we want to be more than friends, then we might get married. But for now, we are friends and nothing more. So please stop demanding anything else."

He nodded, but he was much happier than he had been in a while. His mother had admitted to a possibility of his biggest dream coming true. He could have a real father, not just a ghost he didn't even know. And the father would be Gale.

* * *

The rest of their week in District Two passed in much the same way. Every morning, Annie got up and made Gale breakfast and then sat with him until he had to leave. Finn and Annie wandered the city while Gale was at work and then the three spent their evenings together in the apartment, playing cards or watching TV or just talking.

Every available moment, Annie scribbled in her journal. As her memories flowed onto the pages and out of her mind, she started to feel lighter. She still cried a lot. Sometimes Finn and Gale would catch her and ask if she was okay. She would simply nod and continue with her writing.

On the night before they left, Annie closed herself in her room after supper. What she decided to write about that evening was difficult and she needed to be alone to get all the words out. Gale knocked to check on her several times. She promised she was, but really, she felt herself slipping away with every word she wrote.

The house was quiet as she wrote the last word. The journal was filled. There were only a couple pages left. But she was done. All the important events from the moment she first saw Finnick until the last moments spent with him were written down. She was drained. There were still a few events that she hadn't written down, but mostly they were not things Finn needed to know about.

She stood and walked out of her room and straight into Gale's. She stood by his bed a moment and looked down at him. She reached out and ran a hand over his hair.

Gale opened his eyes at the touch. He looked up. "What's wrong, Annie?"

Her chin trembled and tears welled in her eyes. "I'm done."

He gently pulled her onto the bed with him, wrapping the blanket and his arms around her, holding her close.

Annie held onto him tightly and cried on his shoulder until she fell asleep.

He rubbed her back for a long time even after she fell asleep.

She shifted to her side away from him. He rolled over and wrapped his arms around her again, resting his head against hers. He fell asleep and slept better than he'd ever slept before with her safe in his arms.

* * *

Annie woke up the next morning when Gale's alarm went off. He gently unwrapped his arms from around her, trying not to wake her. But it was no use.

She rolled over and looked at him.

He froze as though he had been doing something wrong. Then he smiled. "Hi."

"Hi." She smiled back. She stretched.

Gale was taken in by her form. He'd never really taken the time to have a good look at her because he didn't think she'd appreciate it. But as she stretched her arms and her shirt lifted, showing off a bit of her stomach, he couldn't help but be transfixed but how perfect she was.

Annie saw the lust filling his eyes and then lifted the blanket back up over her.

He swallowed, "I'm sorry. But you are flawless."

She shook her head. "Far from it. I have so many scars."

He smiled, "Maybe one day we can show scar-for-scar."

She blushed and turned her head away. "Not happening, Hawthorne."

He crawled across the bed and hovered over her.

She turned her face. She asked softly, "How's the weather?"

"Clearing up, I think."

"Until I get home tonight and you aren't there." She ducked under his arms and left the room.

Finn saw him mom dart across the space between the doors. He was shocked for a moment and then elated. This was a step in the right direction. He suppressed a giggle and then rolled over to pretend to sleep for a while longer.


	23. Chapter 23

Gale made breakfast that morning. He and Annie skirted around each other awkwardly for a while, but soon relaxed. Gale took every chance he could to touch her. Annie allowed him, taking comfort in his presence for these last minutes.

Finn watched all of this. He said, "Mom, I saw you leaving Gale's room this morning."

Both adults froze. They looked between him and each other.

"So what does that mean?" He asked.

"Nothing." Annie said. "I just…decided…that I needed to have someone's comfort. Nothing happened that you need to worry about."

"So this doesn't mean a wedding?"

"No wedding." Gale said. "Just friends helping each other out."

"Exactly." Annie said. She put her hand on top of Gale's as they finished eating. She got up to clear the plates.

"I'll get the dishes later." Gale said softly.

Annie nodded. She looked at him. "I can't believe it's over already."

"Me neither." He pulled her onto his lap. He smoothed a hand over her hair and her cheek. He kissed her softly and leaned his forehead against hers. "Wow, I didn't think it would be this hard."

"I didn't either." She said softly, wrapping her arms around his neck. She sat back. "Thank you for everything, Gale. I don't know what we'd do without you."

"It's a terrifying thought." He kissed her again.

She stood up. "Finn, go get your things."

He left the room.

Gale stood and pulled her into his arms again and pressed a more urgent kiss to her mouth.

Annie pushed herself up on her toes and returned the kiss with as much insistence. She pulled away reluctantly. "Thank you for all your help this week. I'm giving him the journal to read on the train."

"Good. Are you going to be okay?"

"I think so."

He took a deep breath and let her go. "Let's get you on that train, shall we?"

Gale carried Annie's suitcase. His other hand clutched hers. Why was this so painful? They'd see each other again. They talked about Annie and Finn coming back for another week at the end of summer and Gale making a visit to Four in the winter. It wasn't really a long time in the scheme of things. And he'd be busy with work.

What he really worried about was Annie. She'd been fine all this week, but what would happen when she was back home, surrounded by all the things that reminded her of her dead love? Would she spiral back into the depression? Would she be able to accept it?

They shared a few more kisses on the platform. Annie looked up at him. "I feel like I'm drifting away again."

"Me too." He said softly. "But we'll be okay. I know we will."

She nodded.

"Call me as soon as you get home. If I'm not in my apartment, try the office."

"I will."

"I need a picture of you and Finn for my office. Do you think you can get one? Maybe the two of you on the beach?"

She smiled, "I'll see what I can do." She kissed him once more and then looked at her son. "Finn, tell Gale good-bye."

The boy launched himself at Gale.

Gale leaned over and kissed the top of Finn's head. He whispered, "Look after her. Call me if you need me."

"I will." He looked up. "You really do love her, don't you?"

Gale just smiled and ruffled the boy's hair. "Talk to you later, kid."

Finn smiled. He knew the truth. He climbed on the train and waited as his mom gave Gale one last hug.

They found their seats and settled in for the trip. They watched Gale as the train moved. He looked lost, Annie noted. A tear slipped down her cheek, "As lost as I feel."

"What, Mom?" Finn asked.

"Nothing." She reached into her suitcase and took out the journal. She sat it on her son's lap.

"What's this?" he asked.

She looked at him a moment before she was able to say, "Everything I think you need to know about the real Finnick Odair from the moment I met him to the last time I saw him. The last part was really hard to write." She smoothed her hand over his hair. "Take your time with it. Get to know the man I knew. And if you have any questions, you may ask them."

He looked at the book and picked it up like it was something precious and fragile. It contained first-hand memories of his father. It wasn't some old tape made at the Capitol. It wasn't just people who believed the façade he had to create for himself for all those years. This was the real man. He hugged the book to his chest and looked out the window.

Annie watched him, fighting her tears, trying to be strong. But she was losing the battle. Tears streamed down her face and she wished for Gale's arms to hold her and tell her it was okay. That made it worse. To wish for Gale instead of Finnick was still such a deep betrayal to her.

She stood and made her way to the bathroom. Thank goodness the train was almost empty.

"Don't hate me. Please, Finnick, don't hate me. I'm sorry." She wrapped her arms around herself, trying to hold herself together as she was breaking into a million pieces all over again. "Why did you leave me to deal with this alone? Oh, god, it hurts."

Annie sat on the floor of the bathroom for a long time. She didn't know how long. Finn came and knocked on the door quite a while later.

"Mom, are you okay?" His voice made him sound like such a small boy.

She slowly made her way to her feet and opened the door. Her son had tears falling down his cheeks. She stepped out and pulled him to her. "It's all right, baby. I'm fine."

"You've been in there for a couple hours. People were complaining about having to find another bathroom."

"I'm sorry. I just needed to escape."

"Let's go sit." He led her back to their seats. He wiped at his eyes. "Did you really not love Dad at first?"

She smiled. "I thought he was arrogant, full of himself. And it only seemed worse after he won the Games. But then I was Reaped and he was my mentor and I saw who he really was. He was confident and a fighter. He did what he had to do to survive. He told me just to believe in myself. To keep fighting until the end. When it was all over, the ones who died valiantly would be remembered. The ones who just let everything happen were forgotten. The winners were immortalized."

"Did he love you from the start?"

She swallowed and looked out the window for a long time. Just when Finn thought she wouldn't say anything, she did. "He used to tease me. He said I was so breath-taking the day of the Reaping that he knew if I made it out, he would make me his." She smiled wistfully through her tears. "I don't know if that means he loved me then or not. I knew he loved me when I won and I was…insane. He sat with me a lot and just let me rave or sit quietly staring off."

Her voice grew so soft, Finn had to strain to hear. "When I was quiet, he'd wrap his arms around me and tell me he understood what I was going through. And when I started raving again, he'd scream his own anger at the loss of so much innocent life." Annie was sobbing again. "I'm sorry, Finn, I can't say anymore right now."

"That's fine." He sniffed and wiped at his face. He opened the book again and continued.

Annie walked the length of the train after that. She couldn't sit still. She brought sandwiches from the dining car.

Finn ate as he read. Tears still streamed down his face to splash on the paper, but there was a small smile on his lips.

She whispered, "I did the right thing."

He looked up, wiping his eyes, "What?"

"Nothing." She pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them.

Finn shook her awake as they pulled into the District Four train station. They walked home, both silent, dazed. They walked into their house.

"Still in one piece." Annie observed.

"Yeah." Finn said, "I'm going next door for a while."

She nodded and sat down with the phone. She looked up at the clock. "Yep, still at work." She dialed the number. The assistant picked up.

"Soldier Hawthorne's office. This is Soldier Cole, how may I help you?"

"Hello, Soldier Cole. It's Annie Cresta-Odair, do you remember me?"

"Yes, ma'am, I do. I'm sorry, Hawthorne is on an important call right now."

"Well, when he's available, will you tell him I called? Tell him we made it home and he can call me when he gets off work."

"Will do, ma'am."

"Thank you, Soldier Cole. Have a good day."

"You too, Mrs. Odair."

She put the phone down and looked at the covered glass doors. She stood up and went out onto the beach.

Finn found her there later. He still had the book clutched to his chest. He curled up on the sand and put his head on her lap.

Annie smoothed her hand over his hair.

"You knew he wasn't coming back." He said softly after a while.

"That's right."

"How?"

"I just had a feeling." She was crying again. "And he knew it too."

"When did you find out you were going to have me?"

"The day they told us he died."

"Not the day he really died?"

"No. We were getting the news that only one body was in that building. My heart soared because I thought that maybe he would really come back to me, to us." She shook her head. "But I still had that voice in the back of my mind telling he wasn't coming back. I pushed that voice away. I didn't want to believe it."

They were silent again. They stared out into the ocean.

Finn suddenly asked, "Did you and Gale have sex last night?"

Annie sputtered. She laughed, "What do you know about that subject?"

"I know it's how babies are made."

She smiled. "Who told you?"

"My friend Eddie's older brother."

"Well, it's a very big step for two people who care about each other a lot to take. And while Gale and I care about each other, there will be no sex between us. Friends don't do that."

"Eddie's brother said he's done it with girls who were just friends."

"Well, that's very reckless. You can hurt people that way. You can hurt yourself that way. You should wait until you're with someone you really care about. It would be best if it was with someone you love."

"So do you love Gale?"

She turned Finn's head so that he was looking at her. "Why are you being so curious?"

"Because we never really talk. You're always in your room or out here and you don't talk to me. You said I could ask questions."

"I was prepared for questions about your father and me. Not Gale and me."

"You didn't say they had to just be about Dad."

"Okay." She took a moment to think about what to say. "No, I don't love Gale. At least not the way you are asking. He's my friend. He's good to you."

"I think you should marry him."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah."

She leaned down and looked at him. "You're the only man for me, Finnick Cresta Odair."

"Thanks, Mom. But I think you need Gale."

She laughed. "You may be right. But I'm not marrying Gale. I still love your father too much."

"But Gale loves you. I know he does. He doesn't want to admit it because he knows how you still feel about Dad."

"Finn, I can't love Gale."

"But why not?"

"I've told you."

Finn stood up. "Dad's dead. Gale isn't. You don't make sense, Mom." He stormed off.

Annie watched as her son walked to the house. She heard the front door slam as she turned back to stare into the ocean. She stayed there until it was dark.


	24. Chapter 24

The phone rang as Annie walked up to the house. She heard Finn answer it. She opened the door and watched him for a while as he talked.

"No, we were on the beach and we got into a bit of a fight."

"About what?" Gale asked.

"You. I know you love each other. I don't know why you don't admit it."

"Finn." Annie warned.

"And she's back from the beach, I take it." Gale said. "Look, Finn, I really do like your mom. But there is a lot more to it than us admitting anything."

"My dad?"

"There's that. Your mom still loves him. That's not something you easily get over."

"I know. But it's not fair."

"I'm sorry to tell you, buddy, but there's a lot about life that isn't fair."

"Yeah. Here's Mom." He handed off the phone and then went to his room, slamming the door.

"Gale." She said softly.

"What happened, Annie?"

"He's just… I know what he wants, but I can't give it to him."

"I know. I don't want to replace Finnick. I can't."

"And I don't want you to." She took a shaky breath. "Gale, I feel like I'm betraying him every time I think about you."

"I don't think he'd want you to be alone like this."

"Are you going to tell me something? Because I feel like some big revelation's coming."

"You already know. I don't have to say it out loud. And it would only make it worse if I did."

"I don't know if it would make it worse. But I don't feel the same. I can't."

"You could, Annie. I know you could. I know it's hard. Do you think I don't still wonder about what could have happened with Katniss? The things I could have changed? Hell, I think about all the things I could have done so that Finnick were still with you and I was gone. It would have been better all around. But he's gone. And he's not coming back."

"I still hope for it, Gale. No matter how impossible it is, I still think he'll meet me on the beach. Or in our special place. In the shower. Walk through the front door and pull me into his arms and spin me around." She was quiet.

"Annie, stay with me. You did so well while you were here."

"I know I did. That was because of you."

"Is there something wrong with me?"

"There isn't."

"I'm just not Finnick."

"That's not it, Gale."

"Of course it is." He paused to let all the anger that was bubbling within him melt away. "Annie, I may not be the man you loved then, but I can be the man you love now and for the rest of your life."

"I don't know. I really don't."

"I care about you."

"I just want to be your friend, Gale."

"And I'll be that for you for as long as you need. But my other offer has an expiration date."

"Don't be angry with me." She begged, clutching the phone close to her ear. "I need you to help me be strong and I can't be when you're angry."

"I'm not angry, Annie. I'm frustrated and disappointed. Mostly with myself."

"You're a great man, Gale. Don't doubt yourself."

"Easier said than done."

"You're my best friend."

"And you're mine."

There was silence on the line, both trying to process the implications they were making with their conversation.

Annie said, "I should make some supper."

"Yeah, me too."

"I had fun last week."

"I did too. I miss you." He paused. "It was great holding you last night."

"I appreciate it." She took a few breaths and then said, "I miss you, too."

Finn wandered back into the living room when he heard the phone go back into its cradle. "I'm sorry, Mom." He said softly. "It's none of my business what goes on with you and Gale."

Annie walked over to him and pulled him to her. She kissed his cheek and rubbed his back. "I do like Gale a lot. But I don't want to replace your father in my heart. I can't. And I know it doesn't make any sense to you, but that's the way it is. Gale is a good man and he can be a good role model for you." She took his face in her hands. "He doesn't have to be married to me for him to be that for you. And maybe the two of you can spend time alone together doing the things fathers and sons usually do."

"Could I ask him to teach me to shoot a bow?" He smiled expectantly at her.

She smiled back and wiped at her face. "We'll just have to see about that one."

"Dad would have taught me how to use a trident. I think that, in the scheme of things, a bow is much safer."

She laughed, "Why are you so smart? Where did that come from?"

"The way I understand it, I have a couple of really smart parents."

She nodded. "You do. Even if your father channeled it differently." She kissed his forehead and then went off to make supper.

Finn followed. "Why did you give me his name?"

"It's a strong name, like the man who bore it. I thought if I gave you his name it would be easier. But the more time went on, the harder it actually was. Every day you grow more and more like him. That doesn't help much either."

He sat and thought for a few seconds. He took a deep breath and said, "I want people to start calling me Finnick. Is that okay?"

She nodded. Her throat was tight. "Yeah, if that's what you want."

"You don't have to. I'm fine with being Finn to you. And I'll only ask people you won't see much. And my teachers, well, I'll have a talk with them so that they only call me Finn at parent-teacher meetings."

She smiled. "Thank you, but you don't need to go to all that trouble. You _are_ Finnick. And if you want people to call you that, it's your decision."

He hugged her.

She looked at him. "You're getting so tall. Your father was tall."

He smiled and kissed her cheek.

The phone rang. Finn launched himself at it. "Hello?"

"Hello, Finn, it's Katniss."

"Katniss, hi. Mom and I just got back from District Two today."

Annie went back to making supper as her son brought the phone to the bar and talked.

"I heard about that. Did you have a good time?"

"I did. Gale's so much fun." He looked at his mom and smiled. "And I think him and Mom are about to pledge their undying love for each other. And get married and then have about ten more kids."

Annie ripped the phone out of his hand. "Hi, I'm sorry, my son thinks he's a comedian. Also a match-maker."

Katniss laughed. "Well, I was calling to see how you were doing. You both seem in good spirits."

"We're getting there. Gale came up with this idea for me to write down memories of Finnick and give it to Finn since it's hard for me to actually talk about. And he's been very grateful. He's asked a few questions. And now he wants me to marry Gale, obviously."

"Because she's in love with him, Katniss." Finn screamed at the phone.

Annie threw a wet rag at him. "Stop it."

Katniss laughed again. "Well are you?"

She paused, "Um, I…We're friends. That's it. And if I love him, it doesn't go beyond that."

"She's lying." Finn yelled again.

"Don't you have somewhere else you can be?" She asked.

"Nope. It's dark. You don't let me go anywhere after dark."

"Then go to your room and read a book or something. Give me some privacy."

He sauntered down the hall singing, "Mom's in love with Gale."

"Well, that's my son; more and more like his father every day."

Katniss chuckled, "I'm glad that you and Gale have each other."

"Me too. He's really been a life saver." She continued to cook as they talked. "Did you orchestrate this all those months ago when you put us on the same floor?"

"I would never do such a thing." She paused, "Well, maybe not entirely intentionally."

"Katniss!" She said, shocked.

"Well, I thought the two of you would be a good match. I've seen Gale very little since the war ended and haven't spoken to him at all in ten years. But he was so lost. And I knew you were too. You were only getting worse as Finn got older. I thought he could balance you out. I didn't mean anything by it. And I'm glad you got a good friend out of it and he got two."

"Thank you. Finn needs a stable man who isn't feeble and forgetful or people who think I'm completely insane."

"So are you going to marry him?"

"Katniss…In my heart I'm still married to Finnick. Anything else feels wrong. I love Gale, he's a good friend, but that's all he can ever be."

"As long as you both know that."

"We do. We agreed." She paused. "He wants more."

"Yeah?"

"He pretty much told me he was in love with me. He never came right out and said it, but it was implied pretty heavily."

"Well, there you have it."

"And there's something else."

"What?"

"I climbed into bed with him last night."

"You what?"

"Nothing happened, I just cried myself to sleep on his shoulder. But…it was nice. I'd forgotten what it was like to have someone hold me while I slept."

"Wow."

"Yeah. The other part of that is that Finn saw me leaving his room this morning. That's probably why he thinks there's more there."

Finn called from the hall, "You forgot the part where you kissed him. All week."

"Annie!" It was Katniss's turn to be shocked. "You kissed him?"

"Yeah." Annie said, embarrassed.

"Well, no wonder your nine-year-old wants to marry him." She laughed. "How was it? Was it nice?"

She gave a girlish giggle, "It was."

"But you're still just friends?"

"For now. Like I said, I still feel married to Finnick. I sometimes still hope he'll come back to me."

Katniss said gently, "He's not, Annie."

"I know he's not. But I still don't want to believe he's gone. Even all these years later."

"I feel the same way. About all of them: Prim, Finnick, Boggs. It's hard. But life goes on. Finnick wouldn't want you to lock yourself away forever."

"I guess not." She started to slip away. She took a moment and pulled herself back up. "I need to go, Katniss."

"Okay. But think about what I said."

"I will."

She hung up the phone. She turned to her son still lurking in the hall. The set of his mouth was so Finnick. She gave him a sad smile, "Eavesdropper."

He laughed maniacally and launched himself at her. "You still love me."

"I'll always love you, Finn." She kissed his forehead. "Help me finish supper."


	25. Chapter 25

A letter arrived in the mail for Annie a few days later. She laughed when she saw it was from Gale. She opened it and started reading.

" _I wanted to send you a letter because sometimes I just feel like writing stuff down instead of saying them aloud. Sometimes it's easier. I guess you know that now._

" _I'm proud to say you're my friend. I'm proud of you and the progress you've made in the time I've known you. I know it will still take a while, but you're on a good road. And in the long run, your son will appreciate it._

" _Another reason I decided to write you is because saying the words doesn't seem to be working. Simply saying that I care about you isn't enough. I care about everything you do, Annie. I care about you getting better. I care about way you're treated. And I care about the way you treat others._

" _Truthfully, Annie, I think you're not a great person. You let me kiss you. You let me hold you. You let me tell you everything about me and you only give me bits and pieces. I want all of you and I know you can't give me that now, but I want it. It's what I hope for. It's what keeps me calling you._

" _And if you worry that I only want you for you, just know that I want Finn, too. I'm there for everything. I don't want to take Finnick's place. I was telling the truth about that when I said it before. But I do want to be the father your son needs. Dale is a good man, but he's old. He'll be gone soon and then where will you be? Everyone else just pretends. They're only nice on the outside. But I was there and I saw the looks in their eyes. They pity you, Annie._

" _I don't pity you. I love you. There, I said it. I love you with everything that I am. I love the way you laugh and the way you smile. I love the look of affection you get in your eyes when you look at Finn, even when he's misbehaving. I love that far-off look you get when you remember Finnick. I love the way your hair glistened in the sun the day we played in the water._

" _But most of all, Annie, I love that you have chosen to keep going on, despite every time you've wished you didn't have to. You're strong. And your strength gives me strength._

" _Please call me when you read this, even if I'm at work. I need to hear your voice."_

Annie sat back and wiped at her face. Then the implications of the letter started sinking in. He wanted to spend his life with her and Finn. He was willing to take on all her insecurities and instabilities.

But she still couldn't let him. Finnick was still there, ever-present in every aspect of her life. And it still felt wrong in so many ways to let herself open up to Gale. Finnick was still her husband. She'd made that commitment.

She heard a click of the door and turned. She stood, expecting him like always. But she had been hearing things. The door didn't open. No one came in. She was still all alone. Finn had gone over to his friend Eddie's house for the afternoon.

She sat back down and sobbed. "Where are you?"

Her despair quickly turned into anger and she picked up the letter. She wadded it up and threw it across the room. That being unsatisfying, she picked up something with more substance, a conch shell Finn had recently found on the beach. She chucked it at the glass doors and laughed at the shattering sound of the glass.

She picked up more things and started throwing them around the room at random. Windows shatter. Nick-knacks broke. Shelves of books were pushed over. Annie screamed her rage over and over.

Dale walked in the house just as she picked up a picture frame. He grabbed her, pinning her arms to her sides. "Calm down, Annie. Sh, calm down, girl. It's okay. It's okay."

"It's not okay, Dale. He's gone."

"He is."

"He's coming back."

"He's not."

"I feel him. I feel him everywhere."

"I feel Mags everywhere too. But they're not here anymore."

She went limp. "Please let me go, Dale."

"You're not going to throw anything else, are you?"

"I'm not."

He loosened his grip, but he didn't let her go. "What happened?"

She looked around wildly for a few seconds before saying. "I got a letter from Gale."

"You got a letter from Gale? Did he tell he didn't want to talk to you anymore?"

She shook her head. "He told me he loved me."

"So why get upset about that? That's something to be happy about."

She shook her head again. "Finnick." She said simply.

"I knew Finnick all his life, Annie. I've known you all your life too. And I know better than anybody what it's like to lose your spouse. So I know Finnick would want you to be happy."

"I'm not happy without him." She was crying again. "I never was."

He wiped the tears off her face with his wrinkled hand. "Now, listen here, girl. You are better than that. I saw how you were when Gale was here. That's the best you've been in years."

She pushed away from him. "Being around Gale makes it better."

"So why tear up your house because the man you admit makes it better told you he loved you?"

She looked around, lost. "I need Finnick. I want to go to Finnick."

He put his hands on her face, "No. Don't talk like that."

"Finn's old enough that he won't be a burden on anyone else. Gale can take him. He said he would."

"I'm not going to hear you talk like this. Promise me you won't do anything drastic."

"I won't. I promise."

He nodded. "I'll help you clean up this mess, Annie." He let go of her and started picking up things.

Annie watched him for a while. "I'll do this, Dale. You can go home."

"You still going to be here later?"

"I have nowhere else to go."

"I'll stop by to see you." he looked around. "And I'll make a call for someone to come here and replace your windows."

"You don't have to do that."

"But I will anyway." He kissed her forehead. "Maybe it would help if you called the man." He smiled and left the house.

She looked around, not sure where to start. In all the mess, she found the letter. She spread it out and looked at it. She folded it up and put it in her pocket. She tackled the mess.

* * *

Gale was worried when he didn't get a call from Annie that day. Had she gotten the letter? Did she not want to see him or speak to him ever again? Should he not have said all those things?

He picked up the phone several times and then put it back down. He didn't want to push. He couldn't.

Several days passed with no word. He tried every night, but no one answered. He was starting to get even more worried. He tracked down Dale's number and called him one morning while he was at work. The old man answered on the forth ring.

"Hello, Dale. It's Gale Hawthorne. Do you remember me?"

"Yes, I remember."

"Is Annie okay? She hasn't called me or answered any of my calls in a few days."

"She was fine when I saw her an hour ago. We had breakfast together."

"Did she say anything about not answering the phone?"

"She said she didn't want to talk to anyone. She's still trying to work through some things. She told me about your letter."

"So she didn't take it well?"

"No, she didn't. She tore up her living room. She broke some windows."

"Oh, god." He sighed and put his head in his hand. "But she's okay? Really okay?"

"She's fine. But I see her how she was on her darkest days. She's barely there, Gale. She told me more than once that she wants to be with Finnick."

"Will you tell her to call me?"

"I'll tell her. I don't know if she'll listen."

"Thank you."

Gale went about his day in a haze. He checked in with Cole between all his meetings to see if there was a message from Annie. There wasn't.

"Anything I can do, sir?"

He shook his head. "Just keep your ear to the phone. And if Annie calls, come get me."

She didn't call the rest of the day.

He left for home as soon as he was able. He practically ran to his apartment. He picked up the phone and tried Annie's number. The phone clicked as it was picked up.

It was Finn. His voice trembled as he said, "Hello?"

"Finn, is something wrong?"

"I was out fishing and I came back and found this really scary note from Mom."

"What did it say?"

"It says, 'The ocean looks so inviting. The waves flowing in and out. If I go to meet the waves will I sink below them or float forever? Help me, Gale. I just want the pain to go away.'"

"Where is she?"

"I don't know. She wasn't on the beach. I looked. I called her name over and over. She didn't answer." He was hysterical.

"Finn listen to me, I'm on my way there. Go to Dale's house. Call the peacekeepers and tell them what you told me. I'll be there as quickly as I can."

"Okay."

"It will be all right."

"What if she's dead, Gale?"

"She's not. Go to Dale's house and call the peacekeepers. I'll be there in a few hours."


	26. Chapter 26

As soon as Gale hung up with Finn, he called the train station to book a seat on the next available trip to District Four.

"Our next train to District Four leaves at seven tomorrow morning, sir." The woman informed him.

"That's the next one? There isn't one leaving tonight?"

"No, sir, there isn't. I'm sorry. Would you like a ticket for tomorrow?"

"No, thank you." He hung up without another word and started calling around to the few people he knew who owned cars, trying to find someone who could loan him one for a couple days.

Most of them asked, "Do you even know how to drive?"

"Yes, of course." He answered in exasperation every time.

"Well, how long do you need it?" was the next question.

"I don't really know."

No one had a car that could be loaned out for an indefinite amount of time. They needed their cars because they weren't in walking distance to their jobs.

He finally struck gold when he called Commander Cabot to appeal to her. Perhaps she would be able to authorize him borrowing one of the fleet cars.

After he hurried through his explanation, she said, "Well, Hawthorne has a heart after all."

"I've always had a heart, ma'am. I just never thought it wasn't appropriate to show it off when there was work to be done. Can you help me out?"

"I can. And not with a fleet car, those aren't good enough. I have one you can borrow. It was my fathers."

He ran quickly through his mind and remembered that her father had just passed on a few months before. He breathed out, "Thank you, ma'am."

"I can have my husband follow me in our car. How long do you need to take off?"

"I don't honestly know."

"Well, I think you can easily take a week if you need it. I'll move around the meetings you need to attend. Just give me the number where I can reach you. And call me when you have the situation stable."

He rattled off Annie's number. "Thank you so much, ma'am."

He rushed around for the next several minutes, throwing together a bag and waiting for Commander Cabot to get there. He called Dale's house and talked with Finn.

"They're out looking, but they said I couldn't go." The boy complained.

"They just know you're better off there waiting for her." He said calmly, even though he didn't feel calm. He wanted to know Annie was all right.

"Are you coming, Gale?" His voice was so tiny.

"As soon as I can get a car here, I'm on my way."

Finn let out a tiny sob. "What will happen to me if she's—"

"Finn, stop thinking like that. I think she's just hiding. She never would just… At least I hope she'd wait until she actually spoke to me or someone else."

"I hope so too."

"Just stay calm, buddy. I'll be there in a few hours. I'll get your mom the help she needs. And maybe they'll even find her before I get there."

"Okay. But please hurry."

"I will." He promised. "I'll be there."

After a few more seconds talking, he walked over to the window and saw two cars pull up.

"My car is here, Finn. I have to go. But I'm coming your way and I will be there in a few hours."

"Good-bye, Gale. Hurry." He begged again.

He locked up his apartment and ran down the stairs, meeting Cabot on the stairs.

She handed him a key. "My dad got this just last year."

"I appreciate you trusting me with it."

"Of course I do. I've been in a car with you driving. You're better than my husband."

He smiled gratefully. "Thank you again."

"Convince her to come back with you so you don't have to rush to another district every time something goes wrong."

He nodded.

She leaned into the car and explained how everything worked. Then she pointed to a screen in the dash. "That is a navigation system."

"Navigation?"

"It's part of the reason I wanted you to borrow this. I can't have you getting lost and losing one of my best employees. Our fleet cars don't have them."

"Thank you." He was anxious to get going, but he calmly followed her directions and punched in the destination.

She patted his shoulder. "Remember to call me, Hawthorne. Keep me apprised of the situation."

"Yes, ma'am. Thank you again."

She closed the door and stepped away to get in the car with her husband.

Gale drove away slowly. When he got to the highway, he increased his speed. He stopped every hour to call and check on the situation in Four. There was still no sight of Annie. He guzzled even more coffee than normal, getting another cup every place he stopped. The sky started to lighten as he pulled into the driveway to Annie's house.

He bolted from the car and knocked frantically on Dale's door.

Finn answered and threw himself at Gale.

He kneeled down in front of the boy. "I need to ask you something."

"What?"

"Did your mom ever show you the place that was special to her and your dad?"

"She never showed me." He said slowly, thinking. "But she did tell me. It's hidden, she said. A mile up the beach from the rock where she used to wait for him. It's a cave in the face of what looks like a giant boulder. She told me if you just look straight up, you wouldn't know it was there. You have to climb up and find it. The opening is just wide enough for one person to climb through."

"I'll go find her." Gale pressed a kiss to the boy's forehead. "I love you, Finn."

Fresh tears fell down Finn's cheeks. He just threw his arms around the man's neck.

Gale picked him up and carried him inside. He sat him down. He kissed the top of his head. "I'll be back. You rest." He walked over to Dale and shook his hand. "Thank you." He said simply and then rushed out the door.

He hurried out to the group outside Annie's house. He asked for the person in charge. It was a very stern-looking woman not much older than himself. She introduced herself. He immediately forgot her name.

He spoke in a rush, "I know where Annie is. But I have to be the one to talk her down."

"We can't simply trust you to know where she is. I don't even know you."

"I'm an old family friend. And Annie and I are… involved."

"That still doesn't prove why I should trust you."

"Then send someone follow me and once you have the proof, come back to call off the search party."

She looked around at the others for a while and then nodded. She called a few names and then said, "Follow him. Come back when you know something."

There were four people that followed Gale. He ran for all he was worth down the beach. Even with the unfamiliarity of the sand, he quickly pulled ahead of them. The empty beach soon became a forest. He had to dodge trees and jump over the roots in his way. He heard the sounds of the people behind him huffing and puffing. They fell even farther behind.

And then he came to the boulder. He called up, "Annie!"

There was no answer.

He started to look around for a way to start climbing. He called again, "Annie, its Gale."

"Gale?" Her voice floated softly down to them.

He turned to see the others had made it. "Did you hear?"

They all nodded.

"Well, get back and call off the search party. And make sure someone tells Finn. That's most important."

They all nodded again and slowly turned.

"Go faster!" he yelled. He turned back to the boulder. He called up, "I'm coming up, Annie."


	27. Chapter 27

Gale picked his way slowly up the face of the rock. It was hard going at first, but as the sky started to lighten, it got a little easier to see the hand and foot holds. He found the opening and hoisted himself in. He panted from the effort.

"Annie?" He said as he crawled in.

The small space was illuminated by a small fire in a corner. Annie was lying on a pile of blankets in front of it. She lifted her head and looked at him a moment. She blinked a few times. Her mouth opened to say something, but then she closed it and she put her head back down.

He sat near her. The roof of the cave was just high enough for him to sit comfortably with a little clearance. When he was settled, he said, "Finn is worried sick."

"I couldn't take it anymore." She said softly.

"Couldn't take what?"

"Being in that house and surrounded by everything. Seeing him in our son's face."

"So you came here? That makes sense. How many times did you and Finnick make love on those blankets?"

She rolled over and looked at him hard. "That's not fair."

"You want to talk about fair? You left a suicide note for your nine-year-old son to find. And you disappeared. He thought you were really dead."

She rolled back over to stare into the fire. "I just can't do it, Gale."

"Can't do what?"

"I can't go on. No one has ever let me do it. They always stop me. They think they're doing me favors, but they're not. None of them are. They don't know. None of them do."

"What are you talking about?"

Annie sat up suddenly and thrust her wrists under Gale's nose. "This is what I'm talking about."

It took Gale a few moments to focus on what she was showing him. All along her forearms were scars from slashes across her wrists. He reached out and took her arms in his hands. "Oh, Annie." He said softly. "Why?"

"The first time I actually tried it was the day I found out I was pregnant. It was the same day that building was destroyed and we were told Finnick and the rest of you were dead. I didn't want to bring a child into this world or go on living without him."

"But someone found you." He said softly, running his thumbs over the scars.

"That time. And the time I tried it when I found out he really was dead. And every time I felt like it was too much. When Finn was crying and I couldn't figure out what was wrong." She pulled her arms out of his grip. "You never noticed them before?"

He shook his head. He reached up and caressed her cheek. "I was too busy looking at your face."

"You're not going to yell at me for it?"

He was taken aback. "Why would I do that?"

"Dale did. That's why I stopped slashing my wrists. Because he could see that. And Finn was getting old enough to notice too." She sat up on her knees. "But what no one knows is that I never really stopped." She pushed down her shorts.

Gale was left speechless by what he saw: several slashes along her thighs, these much fresher than the ones she'd just shown him on her wrists.

He reached out to touch her, but she batted his hand away. She pulled her shorts back up and retreated against the wall. She pulled her knees up to her chest and wrapped her arms around them.

He asked, "Doesn't it hurt when you go swimming? When you get the salt water in them?"

"It does. But that's kind of the point for me: the physical pain makes the other pain more manageable."

"That's an awful way to be, Annie." He scolded.

"You've never felt like this."

"You think so?" He looked at her for a several silent seconds. "I've thought about it, too."

She looked up, a question in her eyes.

He nodded. "I thought it would be better for all involved if I just wasn't here to hate anymore."

"'All involved'? You mean Katniss?"

"Yeah. I created the bomb that killed her sister and so many innocent children." He swallowed at a lump in his throat. "But then I always thought about my mother having to explain to my sister what I did. And having to tell my brothers." He shook his head. "It didn't make the pain go away. I still wanted to be gone." He looked into her face. "But I don't anymore."

"What changed?"

He smiled, "You and Finn." He moved closer to her. "Seeing you in the Capitol if February changed me. It was like there was something better for me." He reached out a hand and smoothed down her hair. "I hate having to leave you because I know this sort of thing is coming. I don't want you to hurt yourself."

She looked into his eyes, pleading. "I can't do it anymore, Gale. I need you to take care of Finn for me."

"Take care of Finn?"

She wiped at her eyes. "It hurts to breathe."

"Annie, please stop talking like this."

"Maybe seeing me in the Capitol changed your mind about ending it, but it helped me to form my decision to finally really do it. Because I know you'd take good care of my son."

"You can't put this on that boy's shoulders. You talk about hurting when you breathe and seeing Finnick everywhere. Think about your son. Think about putting him through that."

"He'll have you."

He grabbed her by the shoulders. "And I'll have no one. Like always, I'm left alone."

"Not alone. Not completely."

"No, but I'll see you every time I look at him. And you wouldn't have died for a cause. You would have ended your life for selfish reasons. Because you can't live without your precious Finnick anymore. A man who died to make the world better for your son. Yes, it's wrong that he's gone and so many of us are still here—that _I'm_ still here—but you can't do this. You can't do it to Finn. And you can't do it to me. We both love you. We both need you."

Tears were streaming down her face as he spoke.

"Please, Annie." He said softly, his voice cracking. "Please, I can't do it alone."

She looked at him for a few seconds. Then she sat up on her knees and took his face in her hands. "I'll need your help. I always will. It doesn't just go away."

"I'm here."

"You won't always be."

"I won't always be here physically. But I'm here for you if you need me."

She nodded and kissed him softly.

Gale tasted the tears on her face. He deepened the kiss and pulled her closer to him.

Annie's arms came around him. She kissed him for several seconds, tasting the coffee he'd had to drink all night. She pulled away slightly. Her lips still brushed his when she said, "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"I won't always be thinking of you." She said almost desperately.

"I know."

She tugged at his shirt, slipping her hands up his chest.

He pulled the shirt off and claimed her mouth again as she made a tentative exploration of his naked torso. He smoothed his fingers through her hair.

She pulled back and removed her own shirt. She pushed him down on his back and kissed him some more. Gale moved his hands slowly over her as she trailed kisses across his jaw and down his neck.

He asked softly, "Are you sure about this?"

She looked at him. "Are you?"

He gently caressed her face. "The last time I did this I was really drunk."

"The last time I did this I was saying good-bye to my husband."

He wiped at her cheeks. Then he pulled her back to him and they kissed some more.

The rest of their clothes were soon removed and they lay together, just taking everything in. Their hands explored the new, unknown territory.

Gale leaned in and kissed Annie gently. She rolled onto her back and pulled him on top of her. He pushed himself up.

"I wasn't kidding when I said I was drunk last time I did this."

"I didn't think you were."

"The truth is I was drunk the other times I did it too. So I don't know how well this will go."

"Let's just see." She pulled him back to her.

"I love you, Annie. I really do."

"I know you do." She took charge of his mouth and wrapped her legs around his waist.

It hurt Gale a little that she didn't tell him she loved him, but he knew where her heart was. When she touched him and kissed him, he knew. There was no more talking after that as they started moving together. Their bodies said all that needed to be said.

Her hands moved slowly all over his body. She wanted to know every inch, to feel every muscle. Her legs wrapped around his and her hands came to rest on his hips.

He lifted his mouth from hers and looked into her eyes as he grew closer. Their lips grazed as they still moved. The only noise either of them made was their breathing.

And then they were both trembling together. Her eyes were wide as she felt the sensations moving through her. It had been so long since she'd felt like this. Tears sprung to her eyes. She never thought this would happen for her again. She blinked the tears away quickly. She pulled Gale in for another kiss as they both stilled.

He looked down at her. "Wow." He breathed out.

She smiled through her tears. "Yeah. Wow."

"I love you." He said again.

"I…" she trained off, unable to respond in kind at the moment.

He kissed her again. "Don't worry about it." He rolled away and looked at the ceiling of the cave. He worked on getting his breathing back to normal.

She slipped her hand into his.

Neither said anything for a long time.

When Annie got her breathing and heartbeat back to normal, she curled up into his side.

His arms came around her. He smoothed his hands over her back and kissed her hair.

She pulled a blanket over them and quickly drifted off to sleep.


	28. Chapter 28

It was only a short time later that Annie woke up and shook Gale. He squinted his eyes open.

"We have to get back." She said as she dressed. "Finn."

He nodded and started pulling on his own clothes. He pulled her to him for a quick kiss between each article.

She climbed down first and called up to him when she was down.

"You're not angry that this happened, are you?" he asked softly, slipping his hand into hers.

She was silent for a while as they walked.

"Annie?"

She looked up at him. "I'm not angry. It's still a little confusing, though. Does that make sense?"

"Yeah."

"Maybe we shouldn't have done it there. And not because of Finnick, but because it might not have been completely the right time."

"Maybe not."

"Finn's probably asleep, though, right?"

"He was awake all night waiting for me, for you. He's probably exhausted." He looked down at her. "He's fine."

She nodded. "I feel guilty that I've neglected my son for all these years. And then to fill a need with you."

He leaned over and kissed her. "I needed you to understand just how _there_ I am for you. Don't feel guilty about that."

She nodded again. She took a deep breath, "I want to move to District Two. I need to. I can't do this without you anymore."

"I can't either." He said softly. "But I don't think you need to completely move to Two. You and Finn need the sea."

"No, we don't. We can learn to live away from it."

"You shouldn't have to. We'll discuss it, but I think we should spend a few weeks of every year here. As much as possible."

She smiled up at him. "I promised Finn he'd have a say in this if it ever happened."

"And I think he definitely should."

They walked in silence, hand-in-hand, for the rest of the trip. Annie let herself into Dale's house. It was silent. Dale was asleep on the edge of his chair, his hands drooping between his knees, his feet crossed at the ankles, his chin resting on his chest. Finn was curled on the couch under a blanket.

She walked over and kneeled at Finn's head. She smoothed his hair back.

The boy blinked his eyes open. It took a minute to focus and then he threw himself off the couch at her. "Mommy." He sobbed on her shoulder.

"I'm so sorry, baby." She said over and over as she squeezed him close to her.

Gale stood awkwardly just inside the door.

Dale awoke with a snort and took in the situation in front of him. He stood and walked over to Gale. He held out his hand. "Thank you."

He slipped his hand into the old man's. "Why are you thanking me?"

"You brought her back. I knew you would. And I knew it would take a while to convince her. Even longer if it had been anyone else."

Gale just nodded.

"You take good care of them."  
"I plan on it."

Dale went into the kitchen and started assembling some things to cook breakfast. "You are staying, right?" He asked the room in general.

"If you don't mind." Annie said, standing. He arm was draped over Finn's shoulders and his arms were still wrapped around her waist.

"I don't."

Gale met the pair half-way and ruffled the boy's hair.

He looked up. Tears still glistened on his cheeks, but he was smiling brightly. "Thank you, Gale."

"I only did what I had to, buddy."

He let go of his mom and beckoned the man closer.

Gale kneeled down. "What is it?"

"Where are we going to live?"

He smiled. "Your mom wants to move to District Two."

"That's what she told me."

"What do you want to do?"

"I really like it here. But I liked it with you in Two."

"What if we figured out a way to live in both places?"

"Like come here in the summer or something?"

"I like the sound of that. I think we can make it work." He kissed Finn's forehead and then stood. He pulled Annie to him and kissed her softly.

She smiled up at him. "How's the weather?"

"A little overcast, but not so bad. Clearer than it was when I first saw you." He kissed her again and then stepped away.

They spent the rest of the morning with Dale. They ate breakfast while Finn hid yawns.

Annie ran her hand over her son's hair and rubbed his back throughout the meal. She leaned over and kissed his temple. He didn't shrug her off like he normally did. She smiled and wondered how long that would last.

Gale stole kisses from her all morning. But it wasn't really stealing when she kept looking at him and smiling so sweetly.

Finn returned to Dale's couch to sleep some more. And though both of them were pretty tired from their own sleepless night, Gale and Annie walked along the beach for a while. Annie led them to the rock where she used to wait for Finnick.

She let go of Gale's hand, kicked off her shoes, and stepped into the water.

He watched her for a while as she just stood there. She was so still. Then he saw her shoulders droop and start shaking. He heard her sniff. She dropped to her knees in the waves.

Gale walked out to her and kneeled behind her. "Annie?"

She leaned back against him. "I can't do this. I thought I would be fine."

"You will be."

"I just miss him so much."

"I know."

She turned around and wrapped her arms around his neck. "How soon can we leave?"

"We don't need to run away."

"It's not running, Gale."

He kissed her. "Let's get some rest. We can start packing."

She looked at him and smiled. "It won't all fit in your apartment."

He wiped at her cheeks. "We'll get a bigger place. Somewhere with an extra room so that maybe Dale can come visit."

"Or your mother."

He rested his forehead against hers. "Yeah, I need to work on that."

"You do. I want to meet them all. I've seen them around Twelve when I've visited Katniss and Peeta, but they were never as important then as they are now."

"So are we getting married?"

She sat back on her heels and looked at him. "Do you want to?" There was a tremor in her voice.

"I'm not going anywhere, you know. At least, I don't plan on it."

"Finnick didn't either. Not really."

"There's no war. None in sight. We'll be fine." He kissed her. "You're stuck with me, honey."

She smiled. "'Honey.'"

He laughed and kissed her again. "I love you. Marry me."

"I guess I can."

"You guess?"

She giggled, "Yes. Yes, I'll marry you." She kissed him again and pushed him into the waves.

They were getting soaked. Gale laughed. "I have some calls to make."

"Calls?"

"My Commander wanted to know what was happening. A call is overdue."

She nodded. "Then you need to call your family."

"And Katniss and Peeta."

"Would it be okay with you if Dale presided over it?"

He smiled. "I'd love it if he would." He kissed her again. "Do you think we could get it done in a couple days?"

"I think so. As long as we can get our guests from Twelve here."

"I can convince them to. All I have to tell my mother is that I'm getting married and she'll drop everything."

Annie laughed and pushed herself up. "Well, come on, then. Let's get this all started before I change my mind." She started running toward the house with a happy giggle.

Gale let out a laugh and ran after her, grabbing her around the waist and swinging her around. He put her down and turned her around. He took her face in his hands. He kissed her softly. "I love you." he whispered.

"I love you." She whispered back and kissed him.

Finn sat down with Gale that evening after supper. He looked at the man very seriously and said, "Gale, we need to talk."

"Okay, Finn." He matched the boy's seriousness.

"I'm going to keep my eye on you for the rest of my life. If you _ever_ do anything to hurt my mom, I swear to you, I will hurt you back."

He nodded, "Yes, sir."

"And I'm fine with having younger brothers and sisters, but not too many."

"I agree. But your mom and I will discuss that further when the time is right."

"Good."

"Anything else?"

"I think that's it."

"Okay, so now it's my turn."

"Your turn?"

"This is going to be a big change for all of us. You're going to be moving and you'll have to make new friends and get used to a new school. It's going to be tough, but I don't want it to overwhelm you. And I don't want you to use that as an excuse to skip school. I expect a lot out of you. Do you understand?"

"Because of your job and who you are?"

"That's part of it, but only a small part of it. Your parents are two of the greatest people in our country's recent history. And as you get older, they may start looking at you more seriously than they ever have before."

"Okay."

He squeezed the boy's shoulder. "I didn't mean to scare you. It's just something to think about."

He nodded. "Do I have to call you Dad?"

"I don't think that's necessary."

"Good. I thought you were going to make me."

"I'd never do that. Your dad was someone very special. I don't ever want to take his place."

"But I never knew him."

"I know. But you will know of him. You already know from your mom and I'll tell you things if you want to know."

He smiled and then wrapped his arms around Gale's neck. "I love you, too, Gale."

He smiled and patted the boy's back. "I didn't say it."

"You said it last night and I didn't say it back. So now I am."

He kissed Finn's forehead. "I love you."

Annie leaned over and kissed both of them on top of the head. "And I love you both."


	29. Epilogue

The wedding took place a few days later. Hazelle, Rory, Vick, and Posy all arrived the day before. Katniss and Peeta arrived in the early morning hours as they had taken a later train. The women bustled around Annie, doing everything to get the last bits of the wedding put together. It was to be done in the District Four style.

Hazelle pulled her son aside just before he left the house for the wedding. "I have something for you." She held out a diamond ring.

He recognized it instantly. It had been in the family for several generations. "That should be Posy's."

She shook her head. "She and I talked about it on the train. It's yours, Gale. Yours and Annie's to pass on to the next generation."

He took it from her and then pulled her into a hug. "I don't know what to say. Thank you, Mother."

She patted his back. "You are very welcome, son." She kissed his cheek. "Now go get married."

Gale laughed and then walked out to the beach with the rest of the guests. He took his place with Dale at the lapping water's edge. He whispered quickly to the man about the addition of the ring. He looked out past the crowd and broke into a smile.

Annie walked slowly to them from the house. Finn held her hand and smiled. He almost dragged her in his rush to get her to Gale. She laughed and they broke into a run for the last few feet. She leaned down and kissed her son's cheek. Then she turned to Gale and slipped her hands into his.

As the ceremony proceeded, Annie's glee became contagious. Gale was grinning from ear-to-ear. They whole party was. There were some tears, mostly from the bride. And even more when Gale produced the ring and slipped it on her finger. It was a little big, but not so much that she'd easily lose it.

They shared a kiss. Then they turned and walked back to the house. There was a small fire burning in the fire place. Gale had explained the significance of the toasting for District Twelves to Annie. She had insisted that it be included as part of their wedding.

The guests watched from the doorway. Once the toasting was completed, they shared another kiss. The guests applauded and then flooded into the house.

Finn threw himself at Gale with a laugh. Gale picked him up and swung him around.

"Welcome to our family, Gale." He said as his feet hit the ground.

"Welcome to mine." He said, ruffling the boy's hair.

For the rest of the afternoon, Annie and Gale rarely left each other's side. Gale took every opportunity to kiss her and touch her and tell her how much he loved her. And she took every chance to return his kisses and touches and endearments.

Katniss said, "I like seeing this."

"What?" Gale asked.

"You're the happiest I've ever seen you, Gale."

He nodded. "I am. Thank you." He looked to his new wife and tugged gently on her hand.

She turned from her conversation with her new sister-in-law and shared a smile with her new husband. She kissed his hand and then turned back to Posy.

"So, when are you going back to District Two?" She asked.

"We're going to pack up the car tomorrow and head back. But we're not giving up everything here completely. This is going to be our summer house, more or less."

"That's a good plan. I understand winters in Two can be brutal."

He smirked, "We passed a few brutal winters Twelve."

"We did." They both paused a moment in remembrance. Then Katniss said, "You should come see us. We'll teach your boy to hunt."

"You'll have to talk to Annie about that."

Annie turned again, "What?"

"Katniss wants to teach Finn to hunt." Gale explained.

Her face darkened. "I'll have to think about it."

He reached up and smoothed a hand over her cheek. "It's just squirrels, honey."

She turned her hand and kissed his palm. "I know. We can talk about it later."

He nodded.

A while later—on a rare moment away from Annie—Gale sat down with his brothers and Finn. The three were getting along very well. Mostly the boy watched his new uncles and listened to their conversation. He contributed very little, but they listened to him whenever he spoke.

Gale asked if any of them needed anything. They said they were fine and he moved along to his other guests. He found Annie again in the crowd and kissed her as everyone watched and cheered.

He whispered in her ear, "It should be getting old by now."

She giggled, "Give it a few days and it might."

He kissed her again and then pressed his mouth close to her ear again. "What can I do to get you alone for a couple minutes?"

She whispered back, "If you can make them all leave, we can have the entire night."

He laughed and rested his forehead against hers. "God, I love you."

"I love you, too."

They shared another kiss.

Katniss slapped him on the back, "Hey, there are other people here."

He laughed and turned around and grabbed her around the waist. "Do you want to be next, Mrs. Mellark?"

"You'll have to take that up with my husband, Mr. Hawthorne." She said with a laugh.

He laughed again and kissed his friend's cheek. Then he went around the room, kissing everyone in attendance. It became a game. He had to chase Vick around the house. But eventually he wrestled the young man to the ground and planted a kiss on him as everyone laughed and applauded.

When finally everyone started to disperse, Gale became more liberal with his kisses to his new wife. Finn, Hazelle, and Posy were set to stay next door with Dale. The others were invited to stay in a few of the other houses with other Victors.

"Remember what I said about brothers and sisters." Finn said sternly as the couple bid him goodnight.

Gale laughed. "That's nothing you need to worry about just now."

"I know; it takes a few months."

Annie looked at him, "You know more than you should."

"Blame Eddie's brother. He's the one that told me about babies and stuff."

She sighed, "I know."

Gale said, "You and I will talk about the things Eddie's brother told you. I want to make sure you have the right facts. Man-to-man, all right?"

He nodded. They hugged him and watched as he walked out of the house and went next door.

Annie kissed him softly and said, "You're pretty near perfect."

"I'm nowhere near perfect." She scooped her up into his arms. "But I'm glad you think so."

She laughed and kissed him.

He carried her down the hall to her bedroom.

"Well, the reason I think you're perfect is that you didn't need me asking you to have that talk with Finn."

He put her down on the bed. "I was on the receiving end of a mother trying to talk about that with her son. I know it's uncomfortable and you might not have all the answers. I mean, I won't either, but at least I have some first-hand experience of what it's like being a boy his age."

"I'm glad he has you, Gale."

"I'm glad I have him. And I'm so very happy I have you." He leaned over and kissed her. It was soft at first, but quickly deepened.

"I love you so much." She said as he stretched out beside her.

"I love you."

She smiled and bit her lip. She kissed him again. "Show me how much you love me."

"Oh, I plan on it." He kissed her. "For the rest of my life."


End file.
